Break up?

Hi all,

Posting while drunk, which is never a good idea, but anyway....

I have arrived at uni, and found several girls who are fun, sparky, attractive, and seem to like me! W"hich is great, but I still have a (younger) g/f back home. Now I have had great times with her and she is a very lovely person. But I am definitely not 'in love' or anything of the sort. Problem is, now I have met so many other ppl since getting to uni, I see that she is not really the girl for me. Unfortunately, she has been having a rough time as of late, with a relative dying :frown:

and some troubles at school. So I am very loathe to leave her, as I know she will be terribly unhappy.

Thing is, I feel like I am missing out and being hampered at uni with the knowledge that a girl is at home believing that I am happy to be with her. While the sex is great, we don't really share a massive bond and I know that sooner or later we will part. Cue horror stories of dumping a young girl?!

Reply 1

tinkerbellejess

It sounds like you know what you have to do, just break it to her gently. It's not fair on either of you to stay with her if you're not happy.

Reply 2

Sheen

hmm i think you should be honest but break it gently.
if youre gonna do it dont do it by msn or anything like that. sit down and have a chat with her

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Yup, I think I really have decided. it seems sad, but I'll have to do it at Xmas :frown:

I respect her too much to do it over msn or phone

Reply 4

tinkerbellejess

Can you not get home at a weekend at all? That really sucks!

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

I can't really, my uni has work at the weekend... :s

I don't want to break up at Xmas, 'cos it near both our birthdays as well!

Reply 6

hippieglitter

I had to break up with my previous boyfriend from home a few months into uni. Unfortunately, i don't believe in a good break up and mine was even worse. I went home for the weekend especially to do it and he didn't bother to come over so i had to do it by letter, then he hadn't told me he was away that week so he didn't get the letter til the end of the week which just happened to be on his birthday, mine was two days later. He was obviously devestated and to cap it all almost a year on he keeps telling me he still loves me.
To the OP, basically you can't keep leading her on like this and you let her hold you back from all these suposedly great oppurtunities, its not fair on you or her. Be kind, do it gently and face to face, yes she will cry, you might do too, be strong, don't let her tears keep you from believe that what you are doing is right and for the best.

Reply 7

Becca28

tbh altho its harsh i think breaking up over phone would be fairer than leading her on, if you know you're gonna break up why stick together now? she's probably meeting new people at the start of the school year as well, its not fair to keep her hanging on waiting for you if you're not gonna stay together

Reply 8

Shockley

I say you should phone her. Don't wait till xmas, you'll only ruin it. Be easy though, and tell her that you'll always be there for her to talk to (sounds like she'll need you). Good luck

Reply 9

LadyEnglish

You type pretty well for a drunk guy :p:

I'd give it a couple of weeks then break up with her. Let her deal with her own issues first. If she's not a uni wait until her half term so atleast the break up won't interfere with her school life x