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Very unhappy at university
I've been at university for a week now and I'm hating it. I am very tearful, nervous, feeling sick, worn out, fed up, and depressed. I haven't been able to make any friends as there is no one else on my block. I do share a room with a stranger, but there is no one else on the block. I absolutely hate it! I've been to a few lectures and I hate them. I can't concentrate, I want to enjoy them and give them ago but I'm so depressed I can't seem to do it. I have caught the flu as well so I feel like crap!
I have rang the support bservices so many times but no one is answering the phone. I've contacted the accommodation office but he won't move me. I am very home sick. I hated home but god, I hate this place. I'm really not enjoying it.
Is anyone else feeling like this?
I have rang the support bservices so many times but no one is answering the phone. I've contacted the accommodation office but he won't move me. I am very home sick. I hated home but god, I hate this place. I'm really not enjoying it.
Is anyone else feeling like this?
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Give it another week, or two. You might enjoy it after you have settled in.
If not, then you should reconsider your options.
I have a friend who started uni last year, she didn't make any friends, and she feels quite lonely and depress most of the time. She didn't tell me about it until later on, she can't change universities now because she just started her 2nd year now.
I hope you don't get into that situation. Best of luck.
If not, then you should reconsider your options.
I have a friend who started uni last year, she didn't make any friends, and she feels quite lonely and depress most of the time. She didn't tell me about it until later on, she can't change universities now because she just started her 2nd year now.
I hope you don't get into that situation. Best of luck.
What exactly are you unhappy about? Have a huge think, it could be something quite specific, not little things.
I didn't really find uni that awesome until half way through the year when I met heaps of cool ppl and made friends. Give it time
I didn't really find uni that awesome until half way through the year when I met heaps of cool ppl and made friends. Give it time
Which uni is this?
They should have a student welface officer you can talk too.
Never give up!
They should have a student welface officer you can talk too.
Never give up!
wesetters
Erm no, it isn't a right. It'd be a kind gesture from the management of the accomodation.
S/he's a paying consumer is s/he not?
Princess_Peach
S/he's a paying consumer is s/he not?
But there may not be any more places in a different hall.
Plus, as far as I know, it's not your right to demand a room change, as it would mean unsettling someone else...
Anyhows, in response to the OP, give it time
Making friends does not happen overnight... Have you joined any clubs/ societies, as that's another way of making friends 
What about speaking to your personal tutor if he/she thinks that the situation is really getting to you, then he/she willbe able to fast-track an appointment for you to student welfare,or maybe approaching somebody who looks friendly and asking if you could borrow something or do they know where the nearest shop etc is ?
There will be lots of places to go for advice. It sounds like you are sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself (I've been there..travelling on my own, arrived in a new country, got food poisoning and had the most isolating few weeks of my life). You've got to get out and seek help rather than sitting back and waiting for it to fall into your lap.
Your personal tutor is there to help you ease in to university life. You really should go and see him or her. If they aren't available then speak to one of your lecturers (they will point you in the right direction if nothing else). If student support aren't answering the phone then go down there in person and speak to them. Probably your university has a counselling service, go meet up with a counsellor and have a chat about things (you'll probably meet 20 other students in the waiting room all feeling miserable too).
I'll bet that there are a lot of other people to go for help. Your uni probably gave you a big pack with details, dig it out and have a look through. Often there are confidential phonelines so you can call up and have a chat. If you don't like your course speak to someone in your faculty. Discuss the work that you will be doing in the future and if it doesn't suit you then you can always change courses.
Get involved in clubs or societies to meet people. You aren't going to meet anyone when you sit at home, so go out and do stuff. Go along to one session to try it out and if you enjoy the activity then you can learn something new and meet people.
Take a look through your contract and see what your rights are when wanting to move rooms. It may be that he won't move you because you only just got there and he wants to see if you settle in. You do need to give it time. If you're still not happy in a couple of weeks then go back. Be persistant and they will move you. I know at my university they have a big accommodation notice board with all the people wanting to change to live other places offering their room up. At the end of the day it is not in the best interests of the university to have their students unhappy and dropping out. The support is there, you just need to more actively seek it.
EDIT: Oh and you said you share a room. Talk to your roommate, find out how they are doing, get to know them. I'm not saying they are going to be your best mate but they will probably be grateful for someone to hang out with too.
Your personal tutor is there to help you ease in to university life. You really should go and see him or her. If they aren't available then speak to one of your lecturers (they will point you in the right direction if nothing else). If student support aren't answering the phone then go down there in person and speak to them. Probably your university has a counselling service, go meet up with a counsellor and have a chat about things (you'll probably meet 20 other students in the waiting room all feeling miserable too).
I'll bet that there are a lot of other people to go for help. Your uni probably gave you a big pack with details, dig it out and have a look through. Often there are confidential phonelines so you can call up and have a chat. If you don't like your course speak to someone in your faculty. Discuss the work that you will be doing in the future and if it doesn't suit you then you can always change courses.
Get involved in clubs or societies to meet people. You aren't going to meet anyone when you sit at home, so go out and do stuff. Go along to one session to try it out and if you enjoy the activity then you can learn something new and meet people.
Take a look through your contract and see what your rights are when wanting to move rooms. It may be that he won't move you because you only just got there and he wants to see if you settle in. You do need to give it time. If you're still not happy in a couple of weeks then go back. Be persistant and they will move you. I know at my university they have a big accommodation notice board with all the people wanting to change to live other places offering their room up. At the end of the day it is not in the best interests of the university to have their students unhappy and dropping out. The support is there, you just need to more actively seek it.
EDIT: Oh and you said you share a room. Talk to your roommate, find out how they are doing, get to know them. I'm not saying they are going to be your best mate but they will probably be grateful for someone to hang out with too.
JimmyJ
What do you mean, "He won't move you".
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
With all due respect, it does not work like that at all - there are procedures that have to be followed.
With regards to your situation, I would honestly re-think about being at university and maybe consider taking a gap year - it sounds like you are having a terrible time; have you spoken to your parents about this?
Why've they put you in a block with only one other person? I think that's awful!
It's easy for people to say stuff like "give it time, you'll make friends" but it must be **** lonely living in such an empty block. Rosetinted's advice is the best on this thread, but I'll give you the hugs
It's easy for people to say stuff like "give it time, you'll make friends" but it must be **** lonely living in such an empty block. Rosetinted's advice is the best on this thread, but I'll give you the hugs
JimmyJ
What do you mean, "He won't move you".
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
If it's anything like my uni,it's more of a case of, there is no where else to move people!
I'm good mates with my housemates because we all moved in as freshers last year. However, I have to retake my first year and I find it really hard to just start talking to people as I'm very shy. I'm living with all lads and would love to have some female friends. The girls I lived with last year moved in to halls, one left because she fell out with everyone and one just decided to quit uni altogether. The ones I do know I don't see much as they have their own groups of close mates. It's really easy for people to say "just start talking to people in lectures" but it's hard for me to actually do. Even if I did, I'd feel a bit stupid explaining that I'm retaking. Plus everyone seemed to be in groups of mates within the first two lectures.
Will the accommodation people not even put you on a waiting list for other halls. Most places have people dropping out before xmas and usually have spare rooms. I think my uni puts people who have to share a room on the waiting list for a single room automatically.
Try to find out if theres someone/somewhere you can go to talk to someone face to face rather than by telephone. There should be a student guidance place on campus.
Will the accommodation people not even put you on a waiting list for other halls. Most places have people dropping out before xmas and usually have spare rooms. I think my uni puts people who have to share a room on the waiting list for a single room automatically.
Try to find out if theres someone/somewhere you can go to talk to someone face to face rather than by telephone. There should be a student guidance place on campus.
Don't give up, because you will only have to start again some where else, why on earth have you been put in an empty block with only 1 other person? I was really worried because I decided not to live in Halls and found the 1st couple of days to be quite worrying, also because no one else from my School was doing med at KCL this year, however met some really nice peeps at 1st freshers event, went on my own so was seriously stressed.
You can email your personal tutor if you are too scared to speak to he/she face to face, really you will feel better if you take the 1st step.
You can email your personal tutor if you are too scared to speak to he/she face to face, really you will feel better if you take the 1st step.
Oh, get over it, If there's no people in your block then join a club, that way you make friends, did you live in the same places as your friends from secondary school, cos I didnt, Mine lived upto 30miles away!! you can have friends and go out without living in the same halls as people.
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
Oren
Oh, get over it, If there's no people in your block then join a club, that way you make friends, did you live in the same places as your friends from secondary school, cos I didnt, Mine lived upto 30miles away!! you can have friends and go out without living in the same halls as people.
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
Oooo...harsh!!! But seriously, just give things time...join societies and groups and go to parties. I know that it's hard to talk to people sometimes, but I'm guessing that plucking up the courage to do that would be a lot less painful than spending 3 years at uni in isolation!
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