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Being Large and scared of meeting/dating

I am a male and recently i have wanted to start meeting new people etc, but i always get scared of being rejected by people and then just feeling stupid. I am quite large (i'm not over reacting i am big). I have dieted, then stopped, gained weight again, then dieted, then stopped, gained weight again so although i have tried its really hard. I really want to get out there and meet up with people but theres always this fear holding me back. Is there any advice you guys can give??

Reply 1

Friggerpants

1

How big we talking?

Don't worry, as far as I care, I'm not bothered if my frined is fat orr thin, I like them for their personality :smile:

Reply 2

Eb

1

Anonymous

I am a male and recently i have wanted to start meeting new people etc, but i always get scared of being rejected by people and then just feeling stupid. I am quite large (i'm not over reacting i am big). I have dieted, then stopped, gained weight again, then dieted, then stopped, gained weight again so although i have tried its really hard. I really want to get out there and meet up with people but theres always this fear holding me back. Is there any advice you guys can give??

Yes.
Firstly. Looks are not everything, trust me. I am fat. Im way fatter than all my friends and im hardly pretty either. I get a fair ammount of attention.
Basically Im shy, and, in order to overcome this, as weird as it sounds, I just pretend im confident. On the inside Im not, and can never accept compliments and stuff. But on the outside it must be attractive I supose. Plus, personality counts for a heck of a lot. Looks change :p:

Secondly. Don't expect anyone to love you if you don't love yourself. I understand why your scared, I used to walk in to rooms, were people laughing I would be convinced that it was because Im fat. It is hard, but don't let being big stop you doing things in every day life. Im talking from exprience, and being happy with yourself is a better feeling than a number on a scale or whatever.

Thirdly. If people reject you, you don't need people like that anyway :hugs:

Nice people will like you for who you are, not what you look like
Trust me, alot of the time it is how you treat yourself that pushes you away from people.
Feel better soon

Reply 3

Lush Law

15

You know that you have self-confidence issues because you're overweight. So lose some, get to a healthy size. Easier said than done I know, but you may as well do it while you're young.

It's about change of lifestyle, not just going on a 'diet'. You need to start exercising, like, totally sweat it out. Don't eat crappy carbs like while bread, white pasta etc. Don't eat fast food, crisps, chocolate, anything convenience. Don't drink fizzy drinks. Don't drive everywhere.

Just think about how amazing and so much more confident you will feel if you lose weight. It's either that, or you need to learn to accept your current size and become comfortable in yourself so that others will feel comfortable around you. Being overweight is not the end of the world, but being slim has, obviously, so many more advantages.

Reply 4

Eb

1

RR

You know that you have self-confidence issues because you're overweight. So lose some, get to a healthy size. Easier said than done I know, but you may as well do it while you're young.

It's about change of lifestyle, not just going on a 'diet'. You need to start exercising, like, totally sweat it out. Don't eat crappy carbs like while bread, white pasta etc. Don't eat fast food, crisps, chocolate, anything convenience. Don't drink fizzy drinks. Don't drive everywhere.

Just think about how amazing and so much more confident you will feel if you lose weight. It's either that, or you need to learn to accept your current size and become comfortable in yourself so that others will feel comfortable around you. Being overweight is not the end of the world, but being slim has, obviously, so many more advantages.

*takes this advice* :p:

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

President Jesus

Yes.
Firstly. Looks are not everything, trust me.

Oh, but they are. Attractive people can afford to be choosy. Ugly fat people tend to be grateful for anyone they can rustle up from a group of mingers.

Nobody attractive would ever come out with such an absurd comment.

Reply 6

Toy Soldier

3

What does it say about me, that I thought this thread was going to be about his penis?

Reply 7

Juwel

18

Here follows a sorry tale. Cue violins.

I am most liekly fatter than you. And don't say large, it's fat OK. Now, I'm too lazy and demotivated to try and lose the weight so I've accepted the futility of my position. Wanna be like me? It's your call.

Reply 8

Eb

1

Anonymous

President Jesus

Yes.
Firstly. Looks are not everything, trust me.

Oh, but they are. Attractive people can afford to be choosy. Ugly fat people tend to be grateful for anyone they can rustle up from a group of mingers.

Nobody attractive would ever come out with such an absurd comment.

OI
I never said I was attractive.
I wouldn't just settle for anyone. What gives you that impression ? Because Im not skinny and beautiful i must want my pick of the mingers?
I want to sneeze right now in your general direction.

Reply 9

TOD100

Anonymous

I am a male and recently i have wanted to start meeting new people etc, but i always get scared of being rejected by people and then just feeling stupid. I am quite large (i'm not over reacting i am big). I have dieted, then stopped, gained weight again, then dieted, then stopped, gained weight again so although i have tried its really hard. I really want to get out there and meet up with people but theres always this fear holding me back. Is there any advice you guys can give??

Mate just go for it. If people can't accept you for who you are then **** them, they're cnuts! They're not worth knowing! At the end of the day if you don't get on with someone, then you never have to see them again! Don't let size hold you back! Many of my best female friends are 'large' but it's not a problem for me! I want to know people who are friendly, up for a laugh, caring and who genuinely care for me! You can meet similar people too! Just get yourself out there and knock them dead!

Good luck pal!

Reply 10

samba

6

Anonymous

President Jesus

Yes.
Firstly. Looks are not everything, trust me.

Oh, but they are. Attractive people can afford to be choosy. Ugly fat people tend to be grateful for anyone they can rustle up from a group of mingers.

Nobody attractive would ever come out with such an absurd comment.

Yea because you come from mars and on mars everybody dates according to their prettiness level.

Reply 11

Aeris

15

More than looks, people are grateful for a warm personality.

(Came out of my fortune cookie :p:

)

Reply 12

wave_o_mutilation

1

Are you looking for friendship? If so, i wouldn't worry. People care far more about the personalities of their friends than how they look, and if they do care about your weight, they're hardly the cool people you want to meet. The only problem you seem to have is with confidence, and self esteem - and you can work on that without doing any exercise. Some of the most charasmatic, popular and coolest people i know are overweight.

Relationships are a trickier area. Many are judgemental and superficial, but again, i wouldnt worry, you'll find many who arn't if you get out there and meet people.

Reply 13

hanadeka2002

Toy Soldier

What does it say about me, that I thought this thread was going to be about his penis?

Me too,me too. :rolleyes:

OP,I know this is a cliche but if people can't accept you for who you are they aren't worth knowing. I like people for their personality, not necessarily for their looks.

Being Large and scared of meeting/dating

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