No Relationship but slept together again...

A relationship that ended because of far too much complication just got complicated again. She won't and can't go out with me as shes destined to marry some 1 else or shes scared of commitment. Anyway last night she came over to stay for a night and I askd if I could hold her and straight away she refused. Then we had an argument over her using my laptop and not trusting in her. After a heated 20mins she finally calmed down as I apologied and let her use it (she wanted to delete some pics of herself which she sent to me and then told me to delete them which I told her in the past I did but I obviously didnt).
So she deleted the pics and was using it and then after she went to sleep I asked if I could give her a massage which she allowed me to. When I went on her neck she told me not to as its her weak spot. So I tried working on it on purpose few times but each time she told me to back off, then I kissed her neck and she turned and kissed me but then said no again.
We must of kissed 2-3 times and she done the same thing saying no.

In the end I got deeper and we went all the way and then as soon as it was done I regreted it cause I didnt want to go that far as I broke the pact and I could hear her saying '****' as we both went too far.

This morning she slept till 2-3pm and now she aint talking that much.
I dont want to bring it up as I know how she didnt want this to happen.
I feel bad as she did try stopping me on a umerous amount of time and told me to go in my own bed to sleep but I was persistant and got her in the end but I had no self control then.

How do I get her respect back?

Reply 1

Jennybean

Anonymous

She won't and can't go out with me as shes destined to marry some 1 else or shes scared of commitment.

Sorry, do you mean she is actually engaged to someone else or that she thinks you're not 'the one'? I think you mean the latter, in which case the fact that you don't even know why you're not together, coupled with the fact that although she doesn't want to be with you she is still staying the night at your house (???!!?!?) means she's just playing games with you. Some people get off on that kind of attention, there's nothing to make a guy want you more than being forbidden fruit; telling you not to kiss her and cursing "at herself" as you guys went all the way undoubtedly just made you want to kiss her more, and gave the sex an illicit edge in your mind, am I right? The fact is, if she really wanted nothing more to do with you she wouldn't be round at your house on the flimsy pretext of deleting photos off your computer. You can win her respect by stopping pandering to her every whim. Stop humiliating yourself by asking to hold her - no doubt she's laughing about you behind your back. If you cut her off she will realise she can't muck you around and the space will let both of you see whether you want to be together for real. Oh and as an afterthought, maybe she does want to be with you and has used the whole "I'm destined to marry someone else" line as a way of prompting you into declaring undying love. If you do think she's the one and you'd like to marry her, perhaps try telling her this and see how she reacts? That might sound like conflicting advice but I don't know much about your relationship, so two different approaches there for ya.

Reply 2

username47781

You really need to stop sleeping with her.

Reply 3

Marie05

Anonymous

We must of kissed 2-3 times and she done the same thing saying no.

she didnt want this to happen.
she did try stopping me on a umerous amount of time and told me to go in my own bed to sleep but I was persistant and got her in the end but I had no self control then.

isnt this rape?! :eek:

Reply 4

username47781

Marie05

isnt this rape?! :eek:

Flippin heck missed that bit where she said no, seriously to the OP i think you better back right off and leave her alone, unless you want to be on a rape charge.

Reply 5

Sam Beckett

You practically raped her or at least manipulated her and you were persistent like a verucca.

She shouldn't respect you; you don't deserve it

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Sam Beckett

You practically raped her or at least manipulated her and you were persistent like a verucca.

She shouldn't respect you; you don't deserve it

I didn't rape her, are you mad. I jut kept massaging her neck when she said no it was a weak spot and when she told me to go I said I wudnt but then after when I did she turned and she kissed me her self. I never actually forced anything but just was persistant as I know how she works (this is not the first time).

She does have another guy in her life that her fmaily wants to marry her and she now and again contacts him, before was pretty much every day.
She also has a soft spot for this other guy (he lives in her area). She deeply cares for him but again according to her she wont accept him. They are always together and he flirts with her now and again. She told me 4 months back that nothing will happen, which I think is true but when she got back from her vacation she told me they would harldy speak but in 5 days they spent 4 days meeting up to either buy stuff or just hang out at her new place.
She told me nothing happened but then yestersday (2 weeks later) she tells me he wanted to kiss her on the balcony, as he was staring into her eyes and then she looked (and accorrding to her) she was like you need to go home.

Last night I was with her and I was suppose to sleep in my own room but I wanted to stay, I spoke for a while then, I couldnt help but stroke her hair but this time she came to me and she kissed me pasionatly and then told me how wrong it was but carried on and then she went all the way on me but as soon as she reached her 'high', She told me to leave.

I did but then I came back as I felt guilty and just wanted to be next to her and mayb try and make her realise I just want her in my life but before I got a chance she raised her voice and said to respect her and to go sleep in my own room.

I went this morning as I couldn't really sleep and I stroked her hair but when she awoke again she told me to go and we will speak later.

Reply 7

username47781

You are making things alot worse, you need to stop and control yourself.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Carl1982

Flippin heck missed that bit where she said no, seriously to the OP i think you better back right off and leave her alone, unless you want to be on a rape charge.

It wasn't a no as in NO!.
It was more of a No this is wrong (which she mentioned last night).
She wanted it but because of sins and esculation she was saying the No.

Oh and that guy she has a soft spot for, shes not talking to him this month as they agreed for religious reasons. However she says she misses him and that shes looking forward to after this month. She didnt say because of him but its soo obvious.

Reply 9

username47781

Seriously just keep away from her, otherwise this is gonna blow up big time and if it does i would not want to be you.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

Before she came London, I was not giving in soo easily but because shes soo beautiful and she makes me happy in person, I give in.
So many people hit on her, even when shes with me but she doesnt show off or pride her self.
I dont know if she doing all this for attention and she knows I would spoil her and spend money on her or because she just want to be mates even after we were dating for just 3month but ended it because of the reasons above.

Reply 11

Even without all the sex stuff, she sounds like a nightmare. Nothing good will come of it and you'll probably just end up getting hurt. Just move on. :smile: