The Student Room Group

Would you think twice before befriending a rich uni student?

I'm posting anonymously to avoid accusations of bragging - I would NEVER disclose this info about myself in real life or even under my internet persona.

Bluntly said, my parents are quite well off. I come from another country where my family owns 4 flats and 2 houses, 2 cars, several acres of land (inherited from my grandparents) and latest models of phones. However both my mom and dad come from lower income families and had to work their arses of to achieve that wealth. They were able to afford international fees without compromising their life quality, and now they are decreasing their workload to ease their way into retirement.

Even though I'm an only child, my parents (especially my dad) tried to teach me the values of modesty and compassion. For example, I don't have my own car, no do I want to, I use public transport whenever I can, I always try to get lowest offers on things I buy, I give away stuff I don't need anymore to charity rather than throwing them away, I pack my own lunches and try not to eat out or spend too much on booze, etc.

But still, my mom buys me stuff from designer brands which I don't particularly oppose, and even though I try my best to not disclose the fact that I'm rich to my friends, I sometimes unintentionally reveal some things that could hint that I am. For example, while talking about properties I said that my family had a summer house in my home country, to which my friend reacted as follows: "Wow you must be really rich to have more than one property." I told her that we sold it eventually (which is not a lie, the only thing I didn't mention was we sold it to buy something even more expensive and that we have more than 2 properties already). Most, if not all, of my friends come from lower income families. Usually I don't enjoy the company of rich people because they come across as spoilt and superficial to me.

Long story short, if you come from an underprivileged family (or just not as well of as mine is), would you think twice before befriending me?

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Not really. I'd probably prefer to befriend a middle class/rich student than a poor one if they didn't look down on me.
Reply 2
It's not about the money. If I like you I'll befriend you, if i don't, I won't.
Not at all, I think is rather be mates with someone from the 'upper classes' so to speak purely because (from personal experience) they're far more measured and just plain nice!
I don't think wealth is something that you should be embarrassed by, but you do have the right attitude regarding your money -flashing your cash around only ever makes you look like you're boasting!


Posted from TSR Mobile
if you're down to earth then I doubt anyone would refuse your friendship purely on the basis of your wealth... there are some people at uni who just don't understand that others don't have as much money and it can be hard to be friends with those people (and expensive) but others are just normal people who are wealthy and that is fine
Original post by Anonymous
I'm posting anonymously to avoid accusations of bragging - I would NEVER disclose this info about myself in real life or even under my internet persona.

Bluntly said, my parents are quite well off. I come from another country where my family owns 4 flats and 2 houses, 2 cars, several acres of land (inherited from my grandparents) and latest models of phones. However both my mom and dad come from lower income families and had to work their arses of to achieve that wealth. They were able to afford international fees without compromising their life quality, and now they are decreasing their workload to ease their way into retirement.

Even though I'm an only child, my parents (especially my dad) tried to teach me the values of modesty and compassion. For example, I don't have my own car, no do I want to, I use public transport whenever I can, I always try to get lowest offers on things I buy, I give away stuff I don't need anymore to charity rather than throwing them away, I pack my own lunches and try not to eat out or spend too much on booze, etc.

But still, my mom buys me stuff from designer brands which I don't particularly oppose, and even though I try my best to not disclose the fact that I'm rich to my friends, I sometimes unintentionally reveal some things that could hint that I am. For example, while talking about properties I said that my family had a summer house in my home country, to which my friend reacted as follows: "Wow you must be really rich to have more than one property." I told her that we sold it eventually (which is not a lie, the only thing I didn't mention was we sold it to buy something even more expensive and that we have more than 2 properties already). Most, if not all, of my friends come from lower income families. Usually I don't enjoy the company of rich people because they come across as spoilt and superficial to me.

Long story short, if you come from an underprivileged family (or just not as well of as mine is), would you think twice before befriending me?


Depending on what university you go to I can guarantee you still won't be the richest person there! In my opinion you are better acting yourself from the outset - find friends that like you for who you are :smile:

Phil


Posted from TSR Mobile
I wouldn't even consider the money. As long as you're not stuck up, which you don't sound, and you're a decent person, then it makes no difference to me.
Tbh my dad is really well off like extremely well off. But I don't tell anyone or brag about it because it's his money and not mine. I'd prefer to make my own money myself rather than sponge off of him and be a rich kid. Personally I would befriend you don't care if you're rich or poor just as long as you're a decent person.
Reply 8
No, as long as you're humble about it and you're a down-to-earth person it's fine. I don't think many people would pick their friends on the basis of their economic class.
I only befriend rich people, as they are more likely to prove useful.
Original post by Anonynous
I only befriend rich people, as they are more likely to prove useful.


Lol


Posted from TSR Mobile
I would be more inclined to befriend a rich person because then they can buy the rounds on a night out
I go to Durham University and come from a low income background. Despite my initial reservations I've been really surprised that money just isn't a factor in friendships, or even really mentioned. I don't really know (or am inclined to find out) the financial situations of my new friends, and they certainly don't bother me about mine :smile: the only time there's a noticeable disparity is when they start talking about experiences they've had that I would never be able to afford, so it's difficult to relate to some people or make conversation sometimes. Or sometimes people who have obviously been comfortable make remarks about people on benefits or the 'locals' that really irritates me.
No . . . I don't really care how much money my friends have. If we like each other then it's all good.

Posted from TSR Mobile
Really don't care about how wealthy the backgrounds of my friends are - not going to start now that I've just started uni! Although, would never be friends with anyone stuck up about wealth. I think most people I've come across are pretty much the same about this!
Original post by Anonymous
I'm posting anonymously to avoid accusations of bragging - I would NEVER disclose this info about myself in real life or even under my internet persona.

Bluntly said, my parents are quite well off. I come from another country where my family owns 4 flats and 2 houses, 2 cars, several acres of land (inherited from my grandparents) and latest models of phones. However both my mom and dad come from lower income families and had to work their arses of to achieve that wealth. They were able to afford international fees without compromising their life quality, and now they are decreasing their workload to ease their way into retirement.

Even though I'm an only child, my parents (especially my dad) tried to teach me the values of modesty and compassion. For example, I don't have my own car, no do I want to, I use public transport whenever I can, I always try to get lowest offers on things I buy, I give away stuff I don't need anymore to charity rather than throwing them away, I pack my own lunches and try not to eat out or spend too much on booze, etc.

But still, my mom buys me stuff from designer brands which I don't particularly oppose, and even though I try my best to not disclose the fact that I'm rich to my friends, I sometimes unintentionally reveal some things that could hint that I am. For example, while talking about properties I said that my family had a summer house in my home country, to which my friend reacted as follows: "Wow you must be really rich to have more than one property." I told her that we sold it eventually (which is not a lie, the only thing I didn't mention was we sold it to buy something even more expensive and that we have more than 2 properties already). Most, if not all, of my friends come from lower income families. Usually I don't enjoy the company of rich people because they come across as spoilt and superficial to me.

Long story short, if you come from an underprivileged family (or just not as well of as mine is), would you think twice before befriending me?


lol you're not rich. Only a few properties, 2 cars and lands?

You're MIDDLE CLASS. Middle class is awesome as both the working class and the high class (by high class I mean those with 6+ cars, yachts, businesses.. etc) befriend you.

You're the buffer in the society, you understand the issues of the working class and the aristocracy of the high class.

When people find out you're middle class, they'd befriend you cuz they think you have good connections. Your life is really easier like this.
Thanks everyone for their responses! :smile:

Original post by Masoudy
lol you're not rich. Only a few properties, 2 cars and lands?

You're MIDDLE CLASS.


Well I'm relieved to hear that. In fact that's what I thought before coming to the UK, but to the majority of my friends here having more than one property does seem like a big deal. In my country it's not unheard of at all, many middle class families have two houses, one for summer holidays and the other for the rest of the year.
All of my best friends in university were rich yet we were all still up for a good laugh and none of us were stuck up. It was strange at first as we all tried to not openly speak about our backgrounds but I think one night during the first month we did whilst we were drinking and in the end it turned out that we all came from fairly well off backgrounds and it meant that we had a lot in common. We then spent the rest of the night drinking and talking about all of the awesome holidays we'd been on. It was really interesting and educational learning about people's experiences and what they've been through during their lives.

I did have poorer friends during university but I found these were the types that would ask to borrow money on because they had wasted their loan and then they'd spend it on going out as opposed to buying the things they really needed like food. I learnt my lesson very quickly and refused to help anyone else who was poor when it came to money. I would only help out my more well off friends who I knew would pay me back by the agreed date.
Reply 18
Original post by Anonymous
I'm posting anonymously to avoid accusations of bragging - I would NEVER disclose this info about myself in real life or even under my internet persona.

Bluntly said, my parents are quite well off. I come from another country where my family owns 4 flats and 2 houses, 2 cars, several acres of land (inherited from my grandparents) and latest models of phones. However both my mom and dad come from lower income families and had to work their arses of to achieve that wealth. They were able to afford international fees without compromising their life quality, and now they are decreasing their workload to ease their way into retirement.

Even though I'm an only child, my parents (especially my dad) tried to teach me the values of modesty and compassion. For example, I don't have my own car, no do I want to, I use public transport whenever I can, I always try to get lowest offers on things I buy, I give away stuff I don't need anymore to charity rather than throwing them away, I pack my own lunches and try not to eat out or spend too much on booze, etc.

But still, my mom buys me stuff from designer brands which I don't particularly oppose, and even though I try my best to not disclose the fact that I'm rich to my friends, I sometimes unintentionally reveal some things that could hint that I am. For example, while talking about properties I said that my family had a summer house in my home country, to which my friend reacted as follows: "Wow you must be really rich to have more than one property." I told her that we sold it eventually (which is not a lie, the only thing I didn't mention was we sold it to buy something even more expensive and that we have more than 2 properties already). Most, if not all, of my friends come from lower income families. Usually I don't enjoy the company of rich people because they come across as spoilt and superficial to me.

Long story short, if you come from an underprivileged family (or just not as well of as mine is), would you think twice before befriending me?


yes.

i have found that rich people have befriended me because they think i can act as some sort of streetwise consultant. a sort of ghillie for the urban environment.

then i've found after they no longer need to be in that environment they detach from any communication.

it does become apparent to me that many rich people do not make friends with poor people unless its for necessity at the time.

even if they genuinely like me i can tell they see me as a sort of "fun character" and a "fond memory" to look back on.

this was a stereotype of rich people that i new and was aware of but hadn't experienced it first hand. but now i have and i will forever second guess intentions from a rich person.
Reply 19
WHen I was in Malta I befriended a girl from my country. Only when we were about to leave I found out she's top 50 richest person in our family. It hasnt changed a thing between us. Shes a cool person, so is her bro who i was friends with as well and I dont care if shes rich or not. She doesnt feel superior to me or anything and I like her the way she is (although I do get jealous sometimes)

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