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Why's my GF being so hostile? watch

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    I hadn't heard from her all day as she must be quite busy ... so I sent her a message about 10 mins ago. I told her that BlackBoard had screwed me over with this submission for next week and she suddenly gets all pissed off telling me she "hates people who don't take education seriously" and that I should take "initiative".

    First of all the deadline is next week ... I submitted it today thinking I could prevent myself from being stressed out - and I'm 100% I've done a good job ... but BlackBoard managed to send my submission before I was able to give in my submission form with the word count and references.

    I'm going to email my tutor tomorrow and notify him about the issue ...

    But why is my GF being so uptight with me? Why is she being so rude too?
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    (Original post by Monsieur Gamma)
    I hadn't heard from her all day as she must be quite busy ... so I sent her a message about 10 mins ago. I told her that BlackBoard had screwed me over with this submission for next week and she suddenly gets all pissed off telling me she "hates people who don't take education seriously" and that I should take "initiative".

    First of all the deadline is next week ... I submitted it today thinking I could prevent myself from being stressed out - and I'm 100% I've done a good job ... but BlackBoard managed to send my submission before I was able to give in my submission form with the word count and references.

    I'm going to email my tutor tomorrow and notify him about the issue ...

    But why is my GF being so uptight with me? Why is she being so rude too?
    She's probably just very stressed, and she might be annoyed about the preventable mistake, which would make her more stressed? woo
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    Its her time of the month.
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    Sorry sorry, who's BlackBoard?
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    There is no way for us to know why she is behaving this way from what you have told us; practically every factor of your relationship with her could be a possible source of her dismissive attitude. You can probably answer your own question here: can you think of any reason that she may have to behave in this way? Is she simply venting her frustration about something else, or is it a little more personal.

    You are the best possible person to find out this information.
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    (Original post by hellodave5)
    She's probably just very stressed, and she might be annoyed about the preventable mistake, which would make her more stressed? woo
    I don't see how it was 'preventable'? ... I completed the assignment a week before deadline, decided to submit it electronically and Black Board decided to screw me over. I can't retract what I've submitted, nor can I submit anything else ... so I guess I'll have to email my tutor to notify him of the problem.

    I know she's stressed, she's got some exam tomorrow ... but I just thought I could lighten her day up with a small chat ... but all it turned to was a sour argument about how I "don't care enough about university".

    I worked my socks off to into Uni, to get onto the course I've always wanted to do ... I've sacrificed parts of our relationship (i.e the closeness in terms of distance we used to have has been increased four fold) ...

    Whenever she's struggling at University, if it's her lack of friends or the stress of her revision and she comes to me to ask for support, I'm ALWAYS there, no matter the weather, no matter how much work I'm doing - I'm there .... but whenever I need some support - just a little to brighten my mood - it's always "I'm too busy to talk", "Can we speak tomorrow", "Do your work".

    It really sickens me how much love, how much compromise, how much attention I put into this relationship, and how much I get I get in return.
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    (Original post by afterallthistime)
    Sorry sorry, who's BlackBoard?

    BlackBoard is a web-based system which allows students from certain Universities to submit their essays/coursework/assignments in electronically rather than paper hand-ins. It's also used by staff of every course.

    It was down a few weekends ago and everyone was in uproar about it ... now this bug/glitch whatever has landed on me and caused me to send off coursework with the necessary submission form with it - the submission form has my references and word count on it ...
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    (Original post by Monsieur Gamma)
    I don't see how it was 'preventable'? ... I completed the assignment a week before deadline, decided to submit it electronically and Black Board decided to screw me over. I can't retract what I've submitted, nor can I submit anything else ... so I guess I'll have to email my tutor to notify him of the problem.

    I know she's stressed, she's got some exam tomorrow ... but I just thought I could lighten her day up with a small chat ... but all it turned to was a sour argument about how I "don't care enough about university".

    I worked my socks off to into Uni, to get onto the course I've always wanted to do ... I've sacrificed parts of our relationship (i.e the closeness in terms of distance we used to have has been increased four fold) ...

    Whenever she's struggling at University, if it's her lack of friends or the stress of her revision and she comes to me to ask for support, I'm ALWAYS there, no matter the weather, no matter how much work I'm doing - I'm there .... but whenever I need some support - just a little to brighten my mood - it's always "I'm too busy to talk", "Can we speak tomorrow", "Do your work".

    It really sickens me how much love, how much compromise, how much attention I put into this relationship, and how much I get I get in return.
    What uni's are you both at? Did she used to be like that, at all? Anxiety disorder?
    I know, blackboard can be funny sometimes. I suppose it isn't preventable if you didn't make a mistake on it, apologies.
    You could ask her straight, when she is in a good mood (hopefully she has those), if she feels there if a problem and if so what it is.
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    (Original post by VannR)
    There is no way for us to know why she is behaving this way from what you have told us; practically every factor of your relationship with her could be a possible source of her dismissive attitude. You can probably answer your own question here: can you think of any reason that she may have to behave in this way? Is she simply venting her frustration about something else, or is it a little more personal.

    You are the best possible person to find out this information.

    Retrospectively I can see why she'd be stressed out. She's having to revise thoroughly over the last weeks to catch up on an exam she failed last week ... the next exam is tomorrow.

    She's also been complaining about not having any friends to hang out with at Uni.

    I don't see ANY reason why she'd be venting on something that has happened between us ... we've been fantastic over the last 3 months and beyond.
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    (Original post by hellodave5)
    What uni's are you both at? Did she used to be like that, at all? Anxiety disorder?
    I know, blackboard can be funny sometimes. I suppose it isn't preventable if you didn't make a mistake on it, apologies.
    You could ask her straight, when she is in a good mood (hopefully she has those), if she feels there if a problem and if so what it is.
    No need to apologise, I'm sorry for coming across as angry I'm just seriously frustrated with my work submission AND now the fact my GF is mad at me ...

    She's usually in a good mood, so I can definitely ask about it ... she's coming over tomorrow night.

    She's studying in London, I'm in Bristol.

    She's always been anxious ... not only in our relationship - with her friends too.

    She's recently had to break things off with her close friend, for reasons she's divulged to me - and of course I've been there to support her.
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    Perhaps she's feeling annoyed about the fact she's got a lot of stress with university (by the sounds of it) and your only problem is that BlackBoard is playing up. Of course BlackBoard isn't the extent of your problems, but that's how she might see the situation and therefore is feeling a bit bitter about it.

    Since you've made a thread about it, it must be uncharacteristic of her so just try and forget about it. Sounds like she's just letting her stress out on you, which isn't exactly fair but that's life.
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    (Original post by Uw0tm8_)
    Its her time of the month.
    That might be emphasising her stress, yes.

    I've forgotten when she gets them though, so I can't be too sure she's on them.
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    (Original post by mollyxrose)
    Perhaps she's feeling annoyed about the fact she's got a lot of stress with university (by the sounds of it) and your only problem is that BlackBoard is playing up. Of course BlackBoard isn't the extent of your problems, but that's how she might see the situation and therefore is feeling a bit bitter about it.

    Since you've made a thread about it, it must be uncharacteristic of her so just try and forget about it. Sounds like she's just letting her stress out on you, which isn't exactly fair but that's life.
    It's really stressing me out ... she's coming over tomorrow for a long weekend, hopefully that can help her ... she was absolutely fine yesterday ...
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    (Original post by Monsieur Gamma)
    No need to apologise, I'm sorry for coming across as angry I'm just seriously frustrated with my work submission AND now the fact my GF is mad at me ...

    She's usually in a good mood, so I can definitely ask about it ... she's coming over tomorrow night.

    She's studying in London, I'm in Bristol.

    She's always been anxious ... not only in our relationship - with her friends too.

    She's recently had to break things off with her close friend, for reasons she's divulged to me - and of course I've been there to support her.
    Hopefully just a rough patch bro!

    I'm new to the long distance at uni thing so can't offer much advice. I'm in Sheffield and my girlfriend (did degree with me) is now in Leeds. I find it helps to plan to see each other every 2 weeks or so (alternate). The coach up and down to and from London (from Sheffield) isn't much... so I imagine it's doable from Bristol too.

    Get her to keep in touch with her friends, keeps up the good ole well-being.

    Tell her to slow down and relax... even if she is wanting to go for it - she will burn out. Best to take it relatively relaxed, steady and constant to a point you can be happy (can't keep up being unhappy and stressed for 3 years, really).

    Is her anxiety really bad? If so, a counsellor might help a lot - free with uni.

    What courses ye both doing and grades ya got? JW - might be to do with it a little
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    (Original post by hellodave5)
    Hopefully just a rough patch bro!

    I'm new to the long distance at uni thing so can't offer much advice. I'm in Sheffield and my girlfriend (did degree with me) is now in Leeds. I find it helps to plan to see each other every 2 weeks or so (alternate). The coach up and down to and from London (from Sheffield) isn't much... so I imagine it's doable from Bristol too.

    Get her to keep in touch with her friends, keeps up the good ole well-being.

    Tell her to slow down and relax... even if she is wanting to go for it - she will burn out. Best to take it relatively relaxed, steady and constant to a point you can be happy (can't keep up being unhappy and stressed for 3 years, really).

    Is her anxiety really bad? If so, a counsellor might help a lot - free with uni.

    What courses ye both doing and grades ya got? JW - might be to do with it a little
    She's in her last year of Maths ... I'm in my first for Criminology.

    I got Straight As at A-level.

    It's pretty bad, from what she's told me ... she used to cut herself, especially when she broke up with her ex.

    The reason why this stresses me out so much is because I love her to bits ... I'm always there for her - like I said no mater how much work I've got to do, I'm always all ears ...

    I give her so much space because I know she has revision/work to do ... but I just wanted to know how she was doing and she just got all rude with me!
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    (Original post by Enoxial)
    Shes defo cheating.
    No, definitely ... nice try though.
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    (Original post by Monsieur Gamma)
    It's really stressing me out ... she's coming over tomorrow for a long weekend, hopefully that can help her ... she was absolutely fine yesterday ...
    Don't let it stress you - you've got nothing to worry about. Sounds like she's had a bad day and is taking it out on you. Pretty sure all will be well when you see her tomorrow
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    (Original post by mollyxrose)
    Don't let it stress you - you've got nothing to worry about. Sounds like she's had a bad day and is taking it out on you. Pretty sure all will be well when you see her tomorrow
    I really hope so .. I was going to give her a surprise too
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    (Original post by Monsieur Gamma)
    She's in her last year of Maths ... I'm in my first for Criminology.

    I got Straight As at A-level.

    It's pretty bad, from what she's told me ... she used to cut herself, especially when she broke up with her ex.

    The reason why this stresses me out so much is because I love her to bits ... I'm always there for her - like I said no mater how much work I've got to do, I'm always all ears ...

    I give her so much space because I know she has revision/work to do ... but I just wanted to know how she was doing and she just got all rude with me!
    See how it goes. I'm sure all will be fine.
    Hopefully she hasn't got anything against you - could do with checking when you can... sounded slightly resentful! But that could be the mood talking.
    If its a consistent thing with stress, recommend she sees someone about it. Apparently it helps a lot for those who are stressed long term or have clinical anxiety (quite a lot of students it seems)!
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    (Original post by hellodave5)
    See how it goes. I'm sure all will be fine.
    Hopefully she hasn't got anything against you - could do with checking when you can... sounded slightly resentful! But that could be the mood talking.
    If its a consistent thing with stress, recommend she sees someone about it. Apparently it helps a lot for those who are stressed long term or have clinical anxiety (quite a lot of students it seems)!
    I'm telling you, there's nothing I can think of from the last 3 months that would suggest she has something against me :/

    I hope it's just the stress talking indeed ... I don't know how I could even mention to her that she should go see someone about it without sound patronising and make her mad ...
 
 
 
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