I feel kind of bad.... Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#1
I'm going to try and not make this long so I apologise if it does end up being an essay.

I was getting to know this guy, we are both 19, we were seeing each other for around 2 months. We were not officially together so he could do what he wanted I suppose. He would tell me all these things saying I was special and all that other **** some men seem to tell you. I honestly really liked him....

I found out around two weeks ago that he had been sleeping with another girl aswell as me. I was pretty upset as he had been telling me he wanted to be with me. I gave him the chance to be honest with me about it but he wasn't completely honest with me.

In the end I told him I forgive him but I don't think I really meant it? I told him I will only carry on this thing we have if he messages this other girl basically telling her to **** off and he did. She was pretty upset by this and I got abuse over facebook for it.

He invited me on a ''date'' around a week ago (even though he's never asked me to go on a date before, as in took me out for a meal) I said yes to him. Around an hour before the date I started thinking that actually I don't want to go and for some reason I was still pretty hurt about the whole him sleeping with another girl, so I didn't tell him I wasn't going, I basically stood him up......

I spoke to him today and he was very upset with me, he said that I have made him get rid of that other girl for what? and that he is now all alone because of me.

I know we weren't exclusive and I know everyone makes mistakes but it hurt me and I don't want to put myself in that position.

I don't know what to do now, I feel like the badder person for standing him up now and making him pie off that other girl. I feel bad about it all.
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emilysawyer_x
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#2
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Nope, you made the lying ******* lose both of you so you could find someone loyal that could commit. Nothing wrong with that in my eyes.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by emilysawyer_x)
Nope, you made the lying ******* lose both of you so you could find someone loyal that could commit. Nothing wrong with that in my eyes.
There's plenty wrong with how she behaved. He told her what happened, he invited her out, she agreed and then stood him up. Let's get out thinking caps on.
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Unknown_user
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Personally I think if he really liked you after you stood him up he wouldn't have said oh you made me lose my chance with that other girl. Kinda shows what he really wants..
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tillytots
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Sounds like a **** tbh. I wouldn't bother with him
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thomashigginson
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#6
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In the end, you did what you thought was right and to be honest that's all you can do. If you were hurting, then I'm sure a lot of people would've done the same thing. I'm not saying that it's right or wrong because everybody will see the situation differently. But don't feel bad if that's what you wanted to do x
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HotCoco.
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I think you were both wrong in this situation. He should of been completely honest. But you should not have told him everything was fine and you forgave him when you still had issues. You both lied. Just be honest and tell him how you feel and that's why you did what you did. Communication is key.


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ringlet
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you should've told him you weren't going, you made yourself look like a ****. He made an effort and you threw it back in his face..
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Rock Fan
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm going to try and not make this long so I apologise if it does end up being an essay.

I was getting to know this guy, we are both 19, we were seeing each other for around 2 months. We were not officially together so he could do what he wanted I suppose. He would tell me all these things saying I was special and all that other **** some men seem to tell you. I honestly really liked him....

I found out around two weeks ago that he had been sleeping with another girl aswell as me. I was pretty upset as he had been telling me he wanted to be with me. I gave him the chance to be honest with me about it but he wasn't completely honest with me.

In the end I told him I forgive him but I don't think I really meant it? I told him I will only carry on this thing we have if he messages this other girl basically telling her to **** off and he did. She was pretty upset by this and I got abuse over facebook for it.

He invited me on a ''date'' around a week ago (even though he's never asked me to go on a date before, as in took me out for a meal) I said yes to him. Around an hour before the date I started thinking that actually I don't want to go and for some reason I was still pretty hurt about the whole him sleeping with another girl, so I didn't tell him I wasn't going, I basically stood him up......

I spoke to him today and he was very upset with me, he said that I have made him get rid of that other girl for what? and that he is now all alone because of me.

I know we weren't exclusive and I know everyone makes mistakes but it hurt me and I don't want to put myself in that position.

I don't know what to do now, I feel like the badder person for standing him up now and making him pie off that other girl. I feel bad about it all.
I am afraid you made your bed, you lie in it. You stood him up, he seemed keen now and course he is gonna be hurt. Learn from it in future next time you have a date.
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S1elyak1
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He did nothing wrong apart from lying to you about it, he should just have been honest with you it's not like you two were official or anything. What you did was bad though if you still had issues with what he had done you should have spoken to him about it instead of accepting his apology and then standing him up. I can see why both of you are hurting but communication is key. I suggest you text him, ask him to meet up with you somewhere quiet where you can both talk it out. I would also suggest a conversation about what you both want as well.
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SmashConcept
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Nothing really bad happened here, you'll both get over it :yy:
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innes1999
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(Original post by amylouisenic)
you should've told him you weren't going, you made yourself look like a ****. He made an effort and you threw it back in his face..
Totally agree with this^ absolute joke of a lassie! you probably embarrassed this guy by telling him you know about him with that girl you made him apologise, and then you stood him up, way to keep it classy


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joker12345
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You're wrong to feel 'kind of bad', you should feel very bad. You weren't exclusive. Sure, it hurt you that he slept with someone - you could have just ended it. Instead you unreasonably demand he is rude to someone who did nothing wrong (assuming she was single). He really liked you, so complied with your unreasonable demand. He then tried to progress your relationship. You THEN didn't even have the decency to tell him you weren't interested, you just didn't come.
His ONLY mistake was not being 'completely honest', whatever that means, when you asked.
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Anonymous #1
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So how do I make it right seeing as I'm wrong?
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Schrödingers Cat
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I spoke to him today and he was very upset with me, he said that I have made him get rid of that other girl for what? and that he is now all alone because of me.
This makes me think he doesn't care about you that much and you were just another girl.

Good move with this one, men get away with this **** too easily.
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Enoxial
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm going to try and not make this long so I apologise if it does end up being an essay.

I was getting to know this guy, we are both 19, we were seeing each other for around 2 months. We were not officially together so he could do what he wanted I suppose. He would tell me all these things saying I was special and all that other **** some men seem to tell you. I honestly really liked him....

I found out around two weeks ago that he had been sleeping with another girl aswell as me. I was pretty upset as he had been telling me he wanted to be with me. I gave him the chance to be honest with me about it but he wasn't completely honest with me.

In the end I told him I forgive him but I don't think I really meant it? I told him I will only carry on this thing we have if he messages this other girl basically telling her to **** off and he did. She was pretty upset by this and I got abuse over facebook for it.

He invited me on a ''date'' around a week ago (even though he's never asked me to go on a date before, as in took me out for a meal) I said yes to him. Around an hour before the date I started thinking that actually I don't want to go and for some reason I was still pretty hurt about the whole him sleeping with another girl, so I didn't tell him I wasn't going, I basically stood him up......

I spoke to him today and he was very upset with me, he said that I have made him get rid of that other girl for what? and that he is now all alone because of me.

I know we weren't exclusive and I know everyone makes mistakes but it hurt me and I don't want to put myself in that position.

I don't know what to do now, I feel like the badder person for standing him up now and making him pie off that other girl. I feel bad about it all.
You wont believe a thread similar to this was posted where the girl slept with someone else and it wasn't exclusive.

BUT everyone said, "It wasn't official" and here its opposite. :facepalm:
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Firenze26
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Wait, was he actually sleeping with a girl while telling you he wanted to be with you? Because if he did, I don't think he has the right to tell you you hurt him because he was sleeping with someone while claiming to want to be with you.

I may have sounded a bit cold so sorry to anyone I may have indirectly offended

Change:

Sorry, I read the whole thing again, should've read it properly first. Anyway, so he did what you asked and broke up with the girl for you and you stood him up after all that......

He did kind of attempted to make amends and you stood him up.... But then again, he was technically cheating on someone (am I one of the only ones who noticed that the guy was flirting with her while sleeping with another technically making him a cheater?)

Wow, I thought this was some right and wrong matter not a grey and grey matter........ This is hard, anyway, in my opinion, just avoid him or something. Too much drama. He was wrong for sleeping with someone and lying to you but you were kind of wrong for making him break-up with someone and standing him up.

Again, i may sound a bit cold and immature so sorry to anyone I may have directly or indirectly offended.

P.S.

Sorry for the horrible grammar
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WeedCanKill
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This thread epitomises why I want to kill myself
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Uw0tm8_
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#19
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Why did you say things you don't mean and then expect him to fully commit to you, only for you to go and stand him up
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AbdulKoyes
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You two weren't exclusive! :/
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