Anyone else feel you don't really make friends at societies?
People always say 'join a society you'll make lots of new friends'. I'd say that was quite the opposite! Societies are run by second/third years who already have friends in the society as they were there last year. Hardly any first years even join societies in comparison to second/third years.
I'm trying my best but I feel I am going literally no where. In my societies people tend to come in and do the activity of the society and that's it. Nothing else.
Has anyone else experienced this with societies? I just want to know when it gets better! And if it does!
I'm trying my best but I feel I am going literally no where. In my societies people tend to come in and do the activity of the society and that's it. Nothing else.
Has anyone else experienced this with societies? I just want to know when it gets better! And if it does!
That's how societies have always been for me
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Original post by yabbayabba
Do you still go? Do you not mind having no 'friends' there?
I go because I enjoy the activities, not all societies are all that social
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Yes and no.... I joined a few in first year and one of them I was quite successful in, however lack of effort from both sides meant it fizzled out. Others I just turned up for the activities and didn't make any friends.
I struggle with making friends anyway so perhaps it's my fault rather than societies....I think it does depend on the society though as they are, as said, run by 2nd and 3rd years who get all their friends to join, but sometimes it makes it cliquey and other times they are welcoming and opening to new people.
I struggle with making friends anyway so perhaps it's my fault rather than societies....I think it does depend on the society though as they are, as said, run by 2nd and 3rd years who get all their friends to join, but sometimes it makes it cliquey and other times they are welcoming and opening to new people.
If that's the case then your society is poorly run. I ran a society at university and I made sure that inclusion was paramount. People who didn't turn up or put the effort in were kicked out and on organised events people would not be allowed to split off into groups. We went out as a society and stayed as a society together all night. The freshers really enjoyed it and we made sure they felt included from the first day.
Presumably, the society must have worked for the second/third years if they made friends?
I think it can depend on the nature of the society. If it's very activity focused, it might not be the best place to meet people. Are there not many events that are just social? If there aren't, perhaps you could suggest organising a social? Christmas meals are always popular.
I have to say your experience is very different to mine and that of my friends, but I never really joined "activity" focused societies and mostly just went on the social nights out.
I think it can depend on the nature of the society. If it's very activity focused, it might not be the best place to meet people. Are there not many events that are just social? If there aren't, perhaps you could suggest organising a social? Christmas meals are always popular.
I have to say your experience is very different to mine and that of my friends, but I never really joined "activity" focused societies and mostly just went on the social nights out.
Original post by Pseudocode
If that's the case then your society is poorly run. I ran a society at university and I made sure that inclusion was paramount. People who didn't turn up or put the effort in were kicked out and on organised events people would not be allowed to split off into groups. We went out as a society and stayed as a society together all night. The freshers really enjoyed it and we made sure they felt included from the first day.
Your society sounds nice
I'd say the second and third years are not really friends friends either. They talk in the society and that's it. And when we do go out... We all talk in that moment but after that that's it. I'd class them as mere acquaintances, not necessarily proper friends.
I feel at university everyone is an acquaintance and not really a proper friend...
Even at tutorials and lectures no one really speaks to each other.
I'm confused, maybe it's just my experience?
I feel at university everyone is an acquaintance and not really a proper friend...
Even at tutorials and lectures no one really speaks to each other.
I'm confused, maybe it's just my experience?
I'm a first year and have had mixed success- Most, it's because I enjoy the activity but I have made a lot of friends in the Christian Union Scoiety
Original post by >Username<
People always say 'join a society you'll make lots of new friends'. I'd say that was quite the opposite! Societies are run by second/third years who already have friends in the society as they were there last year. Hardly any first years even join societies in comparison to second/third years.
I'm trying my best but I feel I am going literally no where. In my societies people tend to come in and do the activity of the society and that's it. Nothing else.
Has anyone else experienced this with societies? I just want to know when it gets better! And if it does!
I'm trying my best but I feel I am going literally no where. In my societies people tend to come in and do the activity of the society and that's it. Nothing else.
Has anyone else experienced this with societies? I just want to know when it gets better! And if it does!
Every society I have ever been in all went to the pub together after each practice. People would exchange numbers and agree up for beers and/or extra practice on other days as well.
There would also be monthly socials (ie pissups) and tours/trips etc.
Either your societies are ****, or you're not participating in them fully?
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