This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

Is it right to go out with someone if you're in love with someone else?

Cutting a really long story short:

I fell in love with this girl and gave up everything for her and although she says she loves me, she prefers to be with another guy that she had dated for 2 years before me. I tried getting her back but last night she told me she wants to be with him forever so even if i go after her i would probably end up kissing her and there is like a 40% chance i can get her back because when we are left together for more than 10 seconds we just both want to kiss each other. I know she is dating this guy now but i would not feel guilty in kissing my ex as this guy split us up and made her cut all contact off with me so i lost my best mate aswell... i kinda lost all my mates for her aswell so i don't really have much left now.

Well i now know that we wont ever get back together because i can't put myself through trying to get her back and if i don't get her back i'll be so depressed that i'll do something stupid. So i'm gonna have to move on and i think i'm ready to, this girl was my first love and i don't think i'll ever stop loving her, so is it really that bad if i date someone else with these feelings? I really want another relationship and it would help me in so many ways, it's just that i'm so fussy i don't think i'll ever find the 1 special person again.

Reply 1

username47781

20

Why are you wasting your time with a girl who is clearly interested in the other guy, there is plenty more girls out there who are single and not attactched, she can't possibly love you if she wants the other guy, she is just using you.

Reply 2

suffolkguy88

Sounds like the same situation I was in mate!
At the end of the day, I realised, that even if its just the two of you together it feels like everything. Its not. If she is not prepared to let go of someone before you. Then at the end of the daymate its her loss. Maybe one day she'll regret that she went back with the guy before her and she'll miss not being with you. Hopefully by then you would off found someone even more lovelier (Is that a word) and you can say to her that unfortunatley she missed her opportunity.

Good luck know its tough mate :smile:

Reply 3

Ywiss

15

You're basically asking whether it's right to treat someone the way she treated you. She was in love with someone else, but went out with you, and now you're asking whether you could go out with someone else whilst still loving her. So in order to answer your question, you should ask yourself how you felt after you found out she loved someone else. Could you make someone else feel as bad and depressed as you felt yourself?

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Ywiss

You're basically asking whether it's right to treat someone the way she treated you. She was in love with someone else, but went out with you, and now you're asking whether you could go out with someone else whilst still loving her. So in order to answer your question, you should ask yourself how you felt after you found out she loved someone else. Could you make someone else feel as bad and depressed as you felt yourself?

You couldn't be so wrong.

How am i treating a possible new gf as bad? She treated me really bad, it's a long story but no one has treated me that bad and i only want her because it's the first girl i loved and still love. Whilst i still love my my ex i would never ruin her relationship as i want her to be happy nor would i treat anyone bad. It's not a matter of treating someone bad, it's a question whether a new relationship would work as if i do still love my ex forever then basically you're saying i can't have a gf again?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

suffolkguy88

Sounds like the same situation I was in mate!
At the end of the day, I realised, that even if its just the two of you together it feels like everything. Its not. If she is not prepared to let go of someone before you. Then at the end of the daymate its her loss. Maybe one day she'll regret that she went back with the guy before her and she'll miss not being with you. Hopefully by then you would off found someone even more lovelier (Is that a word) and you can say to her that unfortunatley she missed her opportunity.

Good luck know its tough mate :smile:

Cheers, i think that's good advice :smile:

Hopefully i will meet someone as i had my first proper relationship with my ex.

Also, i think maybe it's possible to still love someone but not be in love with them :confused:

Reply 6

Juwel

18

Just recognise that she's in a loving relationship. Any feelings you have for each other are hence futile; immaterial. So wish her and her man luck, and get on with your life. You'll find someone who means it when she says she cares about you.

Reply 7

Evil-Tuna

2

Anonymous

Cutting a really long story short:

I fell in love with this girl and gave up everything for her and although she says she loves me, she prefers to be with another guy that she had dated for 2 years before me. I tried getting her back but last night she told me she wants to be with him forever so even if i go after her i would probably end up kissing her and there is like a 40% chance i can get her back because when we are left together for more than 10 seconds we just both want to kiss each other. I know she is dating this guy now but i would not feel guilty in kissing my ex as this guy split us up and made her cut all contact off with me so i lost my best mate aswell... i kinda lost all my mates for her aswell so i don't really have much left now.

Well i now know that we wont ever get back together because i can't put myself through trying to get her back and if i don't get her back i'll be so depressed that i'll do something stupid. So i'm gonna have to move on and i think i'm ready to, this girl was my first love and i don't think i'll ever stop loving her, so is it really that bad if i date someone else with these feelings? I really want another relationship and it would help me in so many ways, it's just that i'm so fussy i don't think i'll ever find the 1 special person again.

I was gonna write a reply but this is too soppy.

Reply 8

Ywiss

15

Anonymous

You couldn't be so wrong.

How am i treating a possible new gf as bad? She treated me really bad, it's a long story but no one has treated me that bad and i only want her because it's the first girl i loved and still love. Whilst i still love my my ex i would never ruin her relationship as i want her to be happy nor would i treat anyone bad. It's not a matter of treating someone bad, it's a question whether a new relationship would work as if i do still love my ex forever then basically you're saying i can't have a gf again?

But can't you see? You're asking whether you could treat your new gf the same as your ex-gf has treated you - it's the fact that she loved someone else and wanted to be with them that hurt you so badly. No way am I suggesting that you never have a gf again, but the answer to your question, "Is it right to go out with someone if you're in love with someone else?" shouldn't even be debatable.

Reply 9

JollyJo

this is gonna sound rather heartless, and i'm sorry, but you gotta get over her an move on. if she treated me like that she'd be out of my love life quicker than u can say **** off. think about the other guy she's datin and say's she loves, and even if she says she loves both of u, there's no way she actually loves either of u. if u love someone truly, it hurts to even think of being with someone else, and if u do it's time to break up with them.
try and stay away from her, to give yourself time to get over her, cos even if u did get back with her, how canu be sure she's not doing the same to u as she's doing to him.
sorry mate but she sounds like a right bitch, find yrself someone with a better heart.

sorry so harsh, but needed saying

Is it right to go out with someone if you're in love with someone else?

Related discussions

Articles for you