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Gf and other guys...
Ok, I need to hear what other people think about this...
My gf told me couple of weeks ago she was going 4 lunch with this guy... fair enough... I guess... but she told me he fancied her and always makes a pass at her etc. I wan't too appy bout her going with him so she goes off on one... Is it just me or am I wrong for being a little bit jealous?
She the tells me he invited her to go to a party AS A COUPLE this weekend just gone. OMG... She told me today that she had a really nice night with this guy and some other guy, and spent the whole thing dancing with them, and yet again when I showed discomfort at this, she went off on one? This week she is on an army cadet course and she told me that there are 42 BOYS AND ONLY 6 OR 7 GIRLS... She also told me there was some guy she was on a course with before who is "soooo nice and so great" OMFG... Am I wrong for being jealous, worried or suspicious? Hs anyone else been in a situation like this?
My gf told me couple of weeks ago she was going 4 lunch with this guy... fair enough... I guess... but she told me he fancied her and always makes a pass at her etc. I wan't too appy bout her going with him so she goes off on one... Is it just me or am I wrong for being a little bit jealous?
She the tells me he invited her to go to a party AS A COUPLE this weekend just gone. OMG... She told me today that she had a really nice night with this guy and some other guy, and spent the whole thing dancing with them, and yet again when I showed discomfort at this, she went off on one? This week she is on an army cadet course and she told me that there are 42 BOYS AND ONLY 6 OR 7 GIRLS... She also told me there was some guy she was on a course with before who is "soooo nice and so great" OMFG... Am I wrong for being jealous, worried or suspicious? Hs anyone else been in a situation like this?
Well, maybe you should tell her that really funny story about your attractive and intelligent friend <generic female name> who you like to go and get drunk with and then later entertain in your room. If she gets mad then maybe she'll realise where you are coming from, if she doesn't care then she clearly trusts you, which is nice. 
Reply 3
Sounds like she's getting to you on purpose. Tell her to stop it.
Reply 4
You are not wrong for feeling jealous and suspicious. I agree with the previous poster that she is trying to get to you on purpose, but disagree that you should tell her to stop. Instead you should act like you don't care when she mentions it and in fact encourage her behaviour. This will achieve two things, firstly it will 1) show her that she is not getting to you and that you cannot be messed around and 2) it will also make her start to doubt as to whether you like her, which means she will start to be more attentive to you. So overall her plan will backfire, she will realise that what she is doing is pointless and in the future she will be more considerate to you because she will have doubts as to whether you like her.
She wants to test you to see how much she can treat you like a doormat. It isn't fair. I assume you are happy with her and don't want to end things, but I would suggest a severve talk with her, threatening that you won't take it anymore. You are't saying she can't talk to guys (!) just that she shouldn't lead them on. Don't sink to her level by making up a girl's name. Be serious and mature, hopefully then she will realise how silly her game is. I've been that girl, I can probably tell how your gf's mind is working.
I can relate. My ex gf used to be like that. Would mention in passing convo how she met a guy at a club and started dancing, how she was just making 'friends' but the next day he told her he liked her etc etc etc. When i questioned her about it she would go off on one and complain i was making out she was a slut or something.
Jesus, just cant win! :P
You are totally right to be jealous, and if shes gonna be that risregardful of your objections... maybe shes not the one for you? Least thats what i figured.
Jesus, just cant win! :P
You are totally right to be jealous, and if shes gonna be that risregardful of your objections... maybe shes not the one for you? Least thats what i figured.
whoever said if she doesnt care then she trusts you this isnt necessarily the case - she might genuinely not care!!
It does sound like you ought to be asking questions, have a chat with her when one of these things hasnt been mentioned so she knows youre concerned but not just as an upshoot after she's told you.
I would just like to say in the girls defence that ive been there, just being mates with a guy and spending time with them (i get on better with guys) who then made a pass at me and i knocked him back but my bloke still went up the wall and blamed me, even though i did nothing to lead him on. i also wouldnt lie or keep it from my boyfriend so maybe she just wanted you to know the truth. (this is a possibility, not necessarily the case but look at it and see if maybe one of you missed something?)
It does sound like you ought to be asking questions, have a chat with her when one of these things hasnt been mentioned so she knows youre concerned but not just as an upshoot after she's told you.
I would just like to say in the girls defence that ive been there, just being mates with a guy and spending time with them (i get on better with guys) who then made a pass at me and i knocked him back but my bloke still went up the wall and blamed me, even though i did nothing to lead him on. i also wouldnt lie or keep it from my boyfriend so maybe she just wanted you to know the truth. (this is a possibility, not necessarily the case but look at it and see if maybe one of you missed something?)
Reply 8
I would say you have a right to be jealous also, lay it down, tell her you will not be messed around, if she just simply went for a drink and a chat i would not bat an eyelid.
But the fact he has admitted his feelings to her and the fact she had a nice night with him as well suggests she can't be that happy in your relationship, which i will stress is not your fault.
Not only that shes saying how much she likes this guy on the army course, i would ask questions asking whether she still wants this because the way she is talking she is more interested in the other guys than you.
I also wonder if she is even ready for a relationship yet the way she is acting.
But the fact he has admitted his feelings to her and the fact she had a nice night with him as well suggests she can't be that happy in your relationship, which i will stress is not your fault.
Not only that shes saying how much she likes this guy on the army course, i would ask questions asking whether she still wants this because the way she is talking she is more interested in the other guys than you.
I also wonder if she is even ready for a relationship yet the way she is acting.
Reply 9
What a joke. She shouldn't be spending time alone with a guy who keeps making moves on her when she has a boyfriend, and she shouldn't be rubbing your face on it and deliberately making you jealous.
Sounds like she has absolutely zero respect for you.
Sounds like she has absolutely zero respect for you.
Reply 10
All sounds very deliberate to me hun.
Do the same back.
Do the same back.
Reply 11
yeah, have sex with someone else before she does, then dump her.
you win
you win
Hmm, maybe she's just trying to be honest. Everyone else seems to be jumping to the conclusion that she's playing with his head, but could it possibly be that the reason she is telling him is cos she doesn't want to feel like she's hiding things from him. Perhaps the reason she told him the other guy likes her is because she's trying to make sure he knows the feelings are not reciprocated... that's what I'd do anyway! If she were talking about a girl on her course being really nice, would he be worried - I think not. It IS possible for men and women to just be friends.
Reply 13
blue_foil
Ok, I need to hear what other people think about this...
My gf told me couple of weeks ago she was going 4 lunch with this guy... fair enough... I guess... but she told me he fancied her and always makes a pass at her etc. I wan't too appy bout her going with him so she goes off on one... Is it just me or am I wrong for being a little bit jealous?
She the tells me he invited her to go to a party AS A COUPLE this weekend just gone. OMG... She told me today that she had a really nice night with this guy and some other guy, and spent the whole thing dancing with them, and yet again when I showed discomfort at this, she went off on one? This week she is on an army cadet course and she told me that there are 42 BOYS AND ONLY 6 OR 7 GIRLS... She also told me there was some guy she was on a course with before who is "soooo nice and so great" OMFG... Am I wrong for being jealous, worried or suspicious? Hs anyone else been in a situation like this?
My gf told me couple of weeks ago she was going 4 lunch with this guy... fair enough... I guess... but she told me he fancied her and always makes a pass at her etc. I wan't too appy bout her going with him so she goes off on one... Is it just me or am I wrong for being a little bit jealous?
She the tells me he invited her to go to a party AS A COUPLE this weekend just gone. OMG... She told me today that she had a really nice night with this guy and some other guy, and spent the whole thing dancing with them, and yet again when I showed discomfort at this, she went off on one? This week she is on an army cadet course and she told me that there are 42 BOYS AND ONLY 6 OR 7 GIRLS... She also told me there was some guy she was on a course with before who is "soooo nice and so great" OMFG... Am I wrong for being jealous, worried or suspicious? Hs anyone else been in a situation like this?
ok the 1st bit i sa little weird. if someone kept making such obvious passes at me i would stay well clear as hes obviously desperate. but the rest of it is just your paranoia. why shouldnt she have male friends? you said she was dancing with *them* ie not at all coupley, just as a group. so what if her amry cadets thing is mostly male? its not like shes having kinky group sex with them. again with the guy who is "soooo nice and so great", would you be worried if she said that about a girl?
Reply 14
little_red_sox
All sounds very deliberate to me hun.
Do the same back.
Do the same back.
That's not a healthy and mature attitude to have towards a supposedly adult relationship.
Reply 15
agreed two wrongs don't make a right
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