Join TSR now for chat about life, relationships, fashion and more…Sign up now

Friendless and kind of depressed. Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Turned 19 recently, was forced to defer a year due to unforeseen circumstances, i'll be going university next year.

    I currently have about 3 or 4 "friends" who I go out with on the odd ocassion but now I come to think of it, none of them actually like the things I do and whenever I make plans with them they always come up with some ****ty excuse.

    I do most things on my own now, pretty much always alone and when im not studying or holding down a part time job i'm out by myself. I can't stand being locked up all day so I go out for walks, go cinema by myself quite often, even go on nights out by myself sometimes too (crazy as it might seem to some).

    Recently I went to a club by myself, made a group of friends who I spent the night with, even met a really cool girl who I could have pursued things with . Most people who I encountered thought it was really wierd I came alone though and I can see why, but what am I supposed to do ?

    I spend so much time inside now it's kind of driving me mental, I know people are going to say just focus on studying but when your cooped up inside for days it's hard to focus on anything.

    I don't know where I can go to meet people or make friends which isn't going to consume too much time. I have friends at work who I go out with every now and then but i'm not really close with any of them. I feel when you reach a certain age too, it becomes harder then ever to make friends and I guess it doesn't help that I look about 22 when im 19.

    I told my friends a week ago about a club night tommorow which is meant to be pretty crazy and they said they'd get back to me, they still haven't.

    Any advice on how I can help myself out of this situation or just cope with it ?

    Merry christmas TSR
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Hello
    I think you should try and develop a relationship with your workmates, as they are likely the people you spend quite a bit of time with. Staying cooped up inside is definitely not advisable and there is no reason why socialising more should be of a detriment to your studying! You could also try finding hobbies (I'm sorry that's cliche) such as sport/fencing etc and then you'll build a base of friends with similar interests. I think it's just a matter of going out more, being spontaneous and open to people who you may have not considered to be the type of people you would be friends with. Text your friends again about tomorrow night, but if they don't reply, go anyway and have a damn good time talking to new people- don't let your friends inadequacies hold you back from getting out there and meeting new people.

    Hope this was of some help, merry christmas!
    Online

    21
    ReputationRep:
    I've coped with it for 21 years. There really is no point running after a finish line that moves further and further away from you.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Lularose83)
    Hello
    I think you should try and develop a relationship with your workmates, as they are likely the people you spend quite a bit of time with. Staying cooped up inside is definitely not advisable and there is no reason why socialising more should be of a detriment to your studying! You could also try finding hobbies (I'm sorry that's cliche) such as sport/fencing etc and then you'll build a base of friends with similar interests. I think it's just a matter of going out more, being spontaneous and open to people who you may have not considered to be the type of people you would be friends with. Text your friends again about tomorrow night, but if they don't reply, go anyway and have a damn good time talking to new people- don't let your friends inadequacies hold you back from getting out there and meeting new people.

    Hope this was of some help, merry christmas!
    They're actually not my workmates anymore , but I still go out with them every now and then, we go out like every other month or so but it's always to a resturant or cinema or some other teenager cliche as they're muslim and can't do alot or stay out late. Hence why I can't really develop our friendships that much.

    I'm not really the sporty type, though I go gym often but I've thought about going creative writing classes or similar, the only thing is these things cost money and time and I don't have that much of either at the moment.

    I was going to go alone today but I don't think I will last time I was quite tipsy so I didn't really give a damn what anyone thought but I got so many people giving me wierd looks and telling me why would I even come out when I told them I was there alone .

    Sorry for kind of striking down all your advice
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    They're actually not my workmates anymore , but I still go out with them every now and then, we go out like every other month or so but it's always to a resturant or cinema or some other teenager cliche as they're muslim and can't do alot or stay out late. Hence why I can't really develop our friendships that much.

    I'm not really the sporty type, though I go gym often but I've thought about going creative writing classes or similar, the only thing is these things cost money and time and I don't have that much of either at the moment.

    I was going to go alone today but I don't think I will last time I was quite tipsy so I didn't really give a damn what anyone thought but I got so many people giving me wierd looks and telling me why would I even come out when I told them I was there alone .

    Sorry for kind of striking down all your advice

    May I know what's your religion?
    Out of curiosity that is
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Im in the same boat as you being 18 and also recently moving to a new area.. im at home probably 95% of the time and uts also driving me mad. Masturbation is also taking over unfortunately.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Staying inside and never getting outside will obviously depress you..I guess you're friends have busy lives probably

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by HSafirah)
    May I know what's your religion?
    Out of curiosity that is
    I'm not religious myself.
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    They're actually not my workmates anymore , but I still go out with them every now and then, we go out like every other month or so but it's always to a resturant or cinema or some other teenager cliche as they're muslim and can't do alot or stay out late. Hence why I can't really develop our friendships that much.

    I'm not really the sporty type, though I go gym often but I've thought about going creative writing classes or similar, the only thing is these things cost money and time and I don't have that much of either at the moment.

    I was going to go alone today but I don't think I will last time I was quite tipsy so I didn't really give a damn what anyone thought but I got so many people giving me wierd looks and telling me why would I even come out when I told them I was there alone .

    Sorry for kind of striking down all your advice
    No worries, hope you sort it out
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Me too. Let's be alone together :five:
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: December 26, 2014
Poll
If you won £30,000, which of these would you spend it on?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Quick reply
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.