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    It's my boyfriend and my housewarming tonight.

    I'm looking forward to seeing friends, but every time I do I can't stop thinking about how our friend who died this May should be there.

    I don't want people to know feel sad as I don't want anyone to feel like I should be over it already. I want to tell the world but feel I should keep it private. I miss him so much.

    (This isn't a question.)

    Tell your boyfriend and a few close friends. Try to have fun at the housewarming, and whilst you cannot get over your friend's death yet (perfectly normal, people grieve differently), try to accept it. Do not try to suppress it though.

    My best friend died November 2009 and I remember feeling terrible that Christmas. I wanted to just sit and speak about him, I wanted everyone else to feel sad and angry like I did, but at the same time I didn't want to be the 'downer'.
    Nobody can tell you how you should or shouldn't feel when someone dies, they also can't tell you how long it will take for you to come to terms with what's happened. Death is something you never 'get over', but just something you learn to live with.

    Don't hold it all in, speak to your boyfriend.
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