Turn on thread page Beta

boyfriend has gone all weird at uni... watch

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    my problem is that i love him so much, and i hate that it seems he doesn't love me back. i know i'm not the first, and definately not the last, but damn it sure does make you feel down.
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    lol its like this guy is weird... when he becomes your husband (if ever) dont be surprised when he says he wants a divorce.... If i was in your shoes I would ask him why this sudden change? I mean, everything needs a decent talk before any break ups can happen... Just punch him and set him straight

    if a person doesnt love you back then that is the worst thing that could happen (that same thing happened to me and i tell ou i was a very depressed guy after that)... i mean, he doesnt deserve your selfless love if hes just gonna be a prick like that
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Sam Beckett)
    He's seen fit girls, he wants fit girls.
    Have you seen her profile pic? Yowzah lol.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    he said that he had been thinking it for a while, which is absolute bull ****. i know this because i know how happy we were in the many months before, and when we went on holiday.

    i mean, does this look like a couple who would break up in a month?

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...andclare01.jpg

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...0/PIC_0058.jpg

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...0/IMG_0122.jpg

    i mean, no. he isn't like that, and i know he wouldn't lie to me.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Maybe it's just the settling phase he's going through at Uni, but i would have thought he would appreciate you a bit more.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by pumpkin7)
    he said that he had been thinking it for a while, which is absolute bull ****. i know this because i know how happy we were in the many months before, and when we went on holiday.

    i mean, does this look like a couple who would break up in a month?

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...andclare01.jpg

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...0/PIC_0058.jpg

    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y14...0/IMG_0122.jpg

    i mean, no. he isn't like that, and i know he wouldn't lie to me.
    Classic guy excuse he's using, i think there's a bigger issue he has.
    • #1
    #1

    Have you explained how you feel?
    Maybe emphasize (if you haven't already!) that the first few weeks of being separated for uni is obviously going to make things feel completely different & you both knew it would be hard - but might not be best to make any rash decisions etc. & maybe you should try & give each other some space to think things over before making things final?

    If he's not prepared to talk to you maturely about this after 2 years together then screw him, he's not worth fighting for.

    But for your peace of mind, you'll want to know you've given it your best shot.
    Word of been-almost-there (ok, we both had started at uni at the same time - but it was the whole dramatically new situation = him suddenly behaving weirdly & being "confused") advice - if he says it's over then leave him to it, don't try & be friends while there's still one sided pining, it'll just complicate things, even more so if other things happen while "friends" :rolleyes: .
    Added benefit of the leave them to it & withdrawing the pleasure of your attention completely (though it took me a while to realise ) is they might then realise exactly what it is they've lost = decision making back in your hands...
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by Sam Beckett)

    Do I detect the faint aroma of emo in the air? *sniff* *sniff*
    Sam grow up.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Carl1982)
    Maybe it's just the settling phase he's going through at Uni, but i would have thought he would appreciate you a bit more.
    i mean yeah. i got him all his stationary and folders and stuff; a kettle, an iron, a load of new clothes and underwear, a load of food to last him a few weeks, all his wash stuff (he would have been very smelly without me) and stayed with him all week.
    i've also taught him to drive, if he has wanted a lift anywhere, i've taken him, i went with him to collect a land rover which he brought (5 hours to tow back bleugh)... i've done so much for him.. it just seems such a waste.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    You look good!

    You'll have no trouble getting another, better boyfriend. Joo can do it!
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by pumpkin7)
    i mean yeah. i got him all his stationary and folders and stuff; a kettle, an iron, a load of new clothes and underwear, a load of food to last him a few weeks, all his wash stuff (he would have been very smelly without me) and stayed with him all week.
    i've also taught him to drive, if he has wanted a lift anywhere, i've taken him, i went with him to collect a land rover which he brought (5 hours to tow back bleugh)... i've done so much for him.. it just seems such a waste.
    I'm wondering if it's the people he's hanging out with, i wonder if they are having an influence on him and telling him the grass is greener on the otherside, obviously not suggesting it is, but it could be why he's being so withdrawn and making all those excuses. Next time you talk to him or actually see him i would question him about what he really wants.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Have you explained how you feel?
    Maybe emphasize (if you haven't already!) that the first few weeks of being separated for uni is obviously going to make things feel completely different & you both knew it would be hard - but might not be best to make any rash decisions etc. & maybe you should try & give each other some space to think things over before making things final?

    If he's not prepared to talk to you maturely about this after 2 years together then screw him, he's not worth fighting for.
    i've asked him to give it a chance but he won't. he said he likes the freedom, yet he says he is on the prowl for someone else... he's already made a bloody rash decision and he jsut says to leave it a long time.. gah. we knew it would be hard, we knew it, and we swore we would get through it.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Carl1982)
    I'm wondering if it's the people he's hanging out with, i wonder if they are having an influence on him and telling him the grass is greener on the otherside, obviously not suggesting it is, but it could be why he's being so withdrawn and making all those excuses. Next time you talk to him or actually see him i would question him about what he really wants.

    mm, i don't know. his one friend is engaged and knew how happy me and my boyfriend were, so i know he has had nothing to do with it, and when we 'broke up', he was only friends really with this one person. it's only in the few weeks we have been apart that he has branched out to the other people on his floor.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    ...the guy after 2 years treats you like this? Sorry nope you dont deserve it.
    • #2
    #2

    In your relationship do you dominate on most of the decisions by any chance? Because if thats the case he may just be enjoying being able to make all his own decisions and not be so tied down to your schedule/choices...
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    NO thats true whatever the reasoning behind it, no girl deserves to be treated like that, i just hope you two pull through somehow.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    i forgot about this; i went to visit my friend down in brighton the other week, and on the way back on the coach, the bloke sitting next to me started feeling me up. to cut a long story short, the police came and arrested him when we arrived in birmingham for sexual assault.
    understandably, i felt gross after and i wanted my boyfriend (who had initiated the 'break up' a few days before) to give me some support. i mean, i tell him everything and confide in him...
    anyway, i text him asking if i could see him and he didn't reply. when i got home and went on msn, he messaged me saying 'was that a joke?'. i mean, come on.. then when i spoke to him a few days later, he told me that he thought i had made it up to, i don't know, get to him...
    why the hell would i do that?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    In your relationship do you dominate on most of the decisions by any chance? Because if thats the case he may just be enjoying being able to make all his own decisions and not be so tied down to your schedule/choices...
    everything was usually decided together, though when he wanted to go somewhere, he would turn on the puppy dog eyes and i would take him. meh
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    sounds like he just doesnt want to be tied down while at uni.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Oh god is that what he said, sorry but he is a heartless b*stard for accusing you of making that up, you don't need that idiot, he is uncaring and selfish.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: October 23, 2006
Poll
Have you ever experienced bullying?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.