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How to stop ignoring guys I like..? watch

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    Basically I have really bad anxiety, not so bad I can be considered ill but bad enough it pretty much rules my life. Anyway, whenever I like a guy I'll always go out of my way to totally avoid and ignore him, even though I'll really want to get to know him. I guess it's cause I'm so terrified of being rejected I just reject them before they even know what's happening! I've tried to make a change this year and talk to this one guy I work with, but I just freeze up, like no words will physically come out of my mouth. Does this sound familiar to anyone, and has anyone overcome it and has some wisdom to share? I've been single for 2 years and it's getting pretty lonely
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    Add them on FB and chat through that?
    You might be able to build a rapport that could help you talk to them in person sooner or later.
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    Sounds exactly like me. Just battled through it and even now, I'm still working on it. If they seem cool, I just breathe and treat them like normal people and just be myself. Forging confidence also helps.
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    (Original post by H0PEL3SS)
    Add them on FB and chat through that?
    You might be able to build a rapport that could help you talk to them in person sooner or later.
    Don't you think they'd find it a bit odd if I've been pretending they don't exist then I'm suddenly on their fb like "heeeyyyy how's it goin??"
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't you think they'd find it a bit odd if I've been pretending they don't exist then I'm suddenly on their fb like "heeeyyyy how's it goin??"
    You'll need to start somewhere, but if talking in person isn't an option, maybe start small, like a smile or something? It can present you as an approachable person, and they might start the conversation instead of you.
    It might also be worth finding something in common to talk about. If they like a certain band or book or whatever, and talking to them about it. It means you don't have to say much, and they'll do more of the talking?
    If you've had even one conversation with them, then you could add them on social media, and then you could talk to them more easily once you know a bit about them, and them you, so you won't feel anxious to talk to them in person.
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    And no. Talking to someone on FB and not in real would be AWKS, well for me It was. This guy would talk to me online like as if I knew him for 20 years but when I went back to school all he said was 'hi' and it was REALLY ANNOYING
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't you think they'd find it a bit odd if I've been pretending they don't exist then I'm suddenly on their fb like "heeeyyyy how's it goin??"
    I believe its better to GO FOR IT. Take the risk. Act first, think later.
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    Throw a squashed up piece of paper at his head in class asif you were throwing a dart, writing "Snapchat later xoxo"
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically I have really bad anxiety, not so bad I can be considered ill but bad enough it pretty much rules my life. Anyway, whenever I like a guy I'll always go out of my way to totally avoid and ignore him, even though I'll really want to get to know him. I guess it's cause I'm so terrified of being rejected I just reject them before they even know what's happening! I've tried to make a change this year and talk to this one guy I work with, but I just freeze up, like no words will physically come out of my mouth. Does this sound familiar to anyone, and has anyone overcome it and has some wisdom to share? I've been single for 2 years and it's getting pretty lonely
    Start with a Hey, what was your name again? And maybe 'ask' him about when the next 'text' would be or something. Oh and when talking to him, tell yourself hes just another normal guy and after you left and all scream your head off in the next room LOL
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    It's all within your own mind, you are the only person who can fix this.

    That being said it's always nice to have exterior support.

    So just do a bit of self-reflection, take a deep look into yourself.
    • #1
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    (Original post by H0PEL3SS)
    stuff
    (Original post by sagzy22)
    stuff
    (Original post by Cremated_Spatula)
    stuff
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    stuff
    Thanks for all your replies, very helpful now is probably a good time to point out that everyone at my workplace thinks I'm a total weirdo as I don't really talk to anyone, and when I'm asked a question about my life, usually something completely awkward will just wordvomit out of my mouth because my brain just turns to mush. I'm not friends with any of them and I don't have any of them on fb, in fact one guy totally hates me and makes excuses to have a go at me. It's quite an uncomfortable environment for me for these reasons so trying to get to know a guy is particularly challenging here :/ I'm starting to think I shouldn't bother.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't you think they'd find it a bit odd if I've been pretending they don't exist then I'm suddenly on their fb like "heeeyyyy how's it goin??"
    Honest male opinion: If you've actively been ignoring a guy when hes been trying to shoulder in slightly it wont matter what you say. At all. Hell talk about how epic your new pairs of shoes are. It wont matter. You'll get a positive response.
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    I am in year 9 going into year 10 and I have had this problem with so many guys!!! I just cant seem to get over them!
    How do you make a guy like you anyways??? Its sooo confusing!! :confused:
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    (Original post by bubblez13)
    I am in year 9 going into year 10 and I have had this problem with so many guys!!! I just cant seem to get over them!
    How do you make a guy like you anyways??? Its sooo confusing!! :confused:
    When I was your age, all I needed was an awesome display picture and screen name on msn to reel the guys in I think that's a slightly embarrassing indication of my age...
    Anyway, it's all about chemistry. If the chemistry's there, then it'll happen. Unless the guy is a total douche or he's like me and avoids everyone he likes. Don't do that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for all your replies, very helpful now is probably a good time to point out that everyone at my workplace thinks I'm a total weirdo as I don't really talk to anyone, and when I'm asked a question about my life, usually something completely awkward will just wordvomit out of my mouth because my brain just turns to mush. I'm not friends with any of them and I don't have any of them on fb, in fact one guy totally hates me and makes excuses to have a go at me. It's quite an uncomfortable environment for me for these reasons so trying to get to know a guy is particularly challenging here :/ I'm starting to think I shouldn't bother.
    Don't just give up!

    Wouldn't it be nice to atleast have someone friendly
    at your work place?

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    When I was your age, all I needed was an awesome display picture and screen name on msn to reel the guys in I think that's a slightly embarrassing indication of my age...
    Anyway, it's all about chemistry. If the chemistry's there, then it'll happen. Unless the guy is a total douche or he's like me and avoids everyone he likes. Don't do that.
    Why do you avoid them though?

    Don't just say I don't know / it's my instinct, that is clearly an excuse.

    If you want to change, you need to do a lot of thinking & put yourself out there in plenty of social situations.
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    gradually alter your personality over time - it is definitely achievable if you try
    I'm worlds of difference away from the kind of person I was 3 years ago
 
 
 
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