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    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    Basically one of the girls i live with always needs a man in her life. she gets so attached and i know that they are not going to lead to anything long term as they are all just based on sex. also she always brings them up in every other sentence even with people she doesn't know. for example i will be with my friends having a normal conversation then (in some lectures she sits with us as we have some shared modules) randomly brings him into the conversation and its just so annoying and irrelevant.
    i really don't know what to say to her, its like she has a lack of self esteem and only is strong when she has a man in her life? i feel completely the opposite never had a boyfriend but am so confident with being independent. i think she may be on the verge of breaking up with the guy she is now and she is going to want pity but i knew it was never going to work out considering she met him in the dodgiest nightclub and we are in uni he isn't etc...
    any comments?

    Have you ever thought she might be depressed,I know that sounds too forward but I know a girl in my circle of friends who is just like this girl who was brave enough to admit it.Its hard to tell because depressed people often are attached because they are afraid to loose that one friend.Maybe she is lonely ,but if this guy is just using her for sex imagine how she is going to feel if he dumps her,as you said she always mentions him in conversations.She'll have even lower confidence and this could lead to some real emotional problems.Trust me I know some girls like this.
    She might just be trying to impress you and strengthen your friendship by irrelevantly bringing him up in talk.BTW Im a guy at Uni and I've seen this stuff happen.
    • #2

    I have a friend at uni who is exactly the same... she always has a guy on the go or obsesses over guys who she has just met. I can sympathise with you, it does get annoying when you're trying to have a laugh/normal conversation and they keep bringing up the fact that *insert name here* hasn't replied to her snapchat even though he opened it 3 hours ago! You have to try and see it from her POV though, people like this are quite often insecure and suffer from low self-esteem. I just try and keep it real with her, if said guy is being an obvious arse to her, I'll tell her in a the least offensive way. Like, "Oh well, there are plenty more guys out there, don't waste your time on this guy, he's obviously playing games, you can do better" etc.

    I know a couple girls like this. I figured it because theyre hugely insecure and need the attention because they had a lack of it growing up/from past relationships. You just got to let them get on with it, set a good example of being independent and maybe drop the occasional hint every now and then!

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