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Meeting a Partner watch

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    It's not like me to come on the internet and make posts like this, which is why it's anon. I'm a 21 year old, going on 22. As with many self-conscious people on this forum, I'm single, and yes, a virgin. I've never been in a relationship with a girl, but I've never really gone out actively looking for one.

    To be honest, I've only ever really fancied three girls. I'm a quiet person and am not really likely to approach someone. It's only really now that I'm thinking that I'm ready for a relationship.

    But, I don't really know as many people since I've left Uni. At sixth form, I had quite a wide circle of both male and female friends who I saw regularly. At Uni, my friends again were quite evenly split between males and females. I was happy just having them as friends and never really thought anything more.

    I've now come back home from Uni. My friendship group is now smaller. My Uni friends now live in different cities and we see each other rarely. At home, I only really see the males now. At work, a lot of people are my own age, but I would consider them as colleagues and not friends.

    Anyway, to the point, with my friendship group going smaller, I'm wondering how to reverse this trend. I feel ready for a relationship, but have no idea where to start looking. I was wondering where the people of TSR found their partners? Would it be worth looking into dating websites, or should I stay offline for this?

    As an aside, I'm quiet a shy and reserved person, particularly around new people and in new situations. I was wondering about people who may have been in similar situations, and if/how they overcame similar issues.

    Apologies for the slight rambling, but I'm a bit of a dating novice
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    I would just advise you to be more outgoing. Go to events you know, places where you can meet people. Not sure about dating sites as there are a number of CREEPS on there both male and female! Depends on if you have the patience to start talking to them an then meeting up. I'd much rather talk to someone face to face and get to know them personally. You could create a lie online and be completely different in person. Are there any girls at uni that you have your eyes on? You could approach them. I'm quite shy myself so I understand how you feel but you have to take the plunge sometime.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's not like me to come on the internet and make posts like this, which is why it's anon. I'm a 21 year old, going on 22. As with many self-conscious people on this forum, I'm single, and yes, a virgin. I've never been in a relationship with a girl, but I've never really gone out actively looking for one.

    To be honest, I've only ever really fancied three girls. I'm a quiet person and am not really likely to approach someone. It's only really now that I'm thinking that I'm ready for a relationship.

    But, I don't really know as many people since I've left Uni. At sixth form, I had quite a wide circle of both male and female friends who I saw regularly. At Uni, my friends again were quite evenly split between males and females. I was happy just having them as friends and never really thought anything more.

    I've now come back home from Uni. My friendship group is now smaller. My Uni friends now live in different cities and we see each other rarely. At home, I only really see the males now. At work, a lot of people are my own age, but I would consider them as colleagues and not friends.

    Anyway, to the point, with my friendship group going smaller, I'm wondering how to reverse this trend. I feel ready for a relationship, but have no idea where to start looking. I was wondering where the people of TSR found their partners? Would it be worth looking into dating websites, or should I stay offline for this?

    As an aside, I'm quiet a shy and reserved person, particularly around new people and in new situations. I was wondering about people who may have been in similar situations, and if/how they overcame similar issues.

    Apologies for the slight rambling, but I'm a bit of a dating novice
    I met my first ever girlfriend at Uni I'm 20 btw We were both loners,she was incredibly shy .I was always over thinking every step of the way
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    You sound like a male me, I am at the point of wanting a relationship, I though am not intending on using dating sites although I swear my friend is going to set up an account on my behalf . My method is to try to expand my social circle and be more out going. I am still a working progress.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As an aside, I'm quiet a shy and reserved person, particularly around new people and in new situations. I was wondering about people who may have been in similar situations, and if/how they overcame similar issues.
    I went out 2-3 nights a week. Approached and spoke to 30+ people on a night out. Ive done this for about a year.

    Its the hardest thing you will ever do. But so far the most rewarding thing I've ever done.

    Also internet dating. Absolutely. The more people you expose yourself to the better. The great thing about internet dating is that there is no ambiguity about why you are there.

    Normal time from initial message to date is two/three nights for me. I would go out before the date to a pub in the middle of the city and just talk to people to get myself in the mood for the date.
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    Maybe go to a nice bar and talk to women there? It can be very nerve wracking but it feels great. It's a good confidence booster and you may have a few interesting conversations, and even a few dates.

    If you have the patience, definitely try internet dating. There are a lot of time wasters/creeps on internet dating sites but then you do find the few hidden gems. When I used to do internet dating, I had a few dates with really decent people and ended up having a 9 month long relationship. There will be many people on dating sites who will be in the exact same situation as you are, so it's definitely worth a try.

    Sometimes, that special person does just pop up into your life out of nowhere. No matter how cliche that may sound. Nearly a year ago, I went to get a new tattoo. Ended up falling for the tattoo artist and we have been together for a while now. I never expected it whatsoever and I wanted a meaningful relationship for so long. However, I would advise against getting a tattoo just to see if you like your artist
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    (Original post by lou 22)
    You sound like a male me, I am at the point of wanting a relationship, I though am not intending on using dating sites although I swear my friend is going to set up an account on my behalf . My method is to try to expand my social circle and be more out going. I am still a working progress.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's not like me to come on the internet and make posts like this, which is why it's anon. I'm a 21 year old, going on 22. As with many self-conscious people on this forum, I'm single, and yes, a virgin. I've never been in a relationship with a girl, but I've never really gone out actively looking for one.

    To be honest, I've only ever really fancied three girls. I'm a quiet person and am not really likely to approach someone. It's only really now that I'm thinking that I'm ready for a relationship.

    But, I don't really know as many people since I've left Uni. At sixth form, I had quite a wide circle of both male and female friends who I saw regularly. At Uni, my friends again were quite evenly split between males and females. I was happy just having them as friends and never really thought anything more.

    I've now come back home from Uni. My friendship group is now smaller. My Uni friends now live in different cities and we see each other rarely. At home, I only really see the males now. At work, a lot of people are my own age, but I would consider them as colleagues and not friends.

    Anyway, to the point, with my friendship group going smaller, I'm wondering how to reverse this trend. I feel ready for a relationship, but have no idea where to start looking. I was wondering where the people of TSR found their partners? Would it be worth looking into dating websites, or should I stay offline for this?

    As an aside, I'm quiet a shy and reserved person, particularly around new people and in new situations. I was wondering about people who may have been in similar situations, and if/how they overcame similar issues.

    Apologies for the slight rambling, but I'm a bit of a dating novice
    Problem Solved?
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    All over the place tbh. My fiance and I met through my landlady when I did my masters degree (he is her boyfriends friend). My best mate met her boyfriend on tinder! Another met a partner speed dating, quite a few are through work connections.

    I think, as annoying as it is to say, you just have to meet people. Through work, hobbies....any way.of getting out and about and you increase your chances. Dont be afraid of dating sites, just remember to be safe and that you will face a lot of rejection. Probably no more than in real life (people walk away in clubs, dont feel a connection at work etc) but it might feel more direct and therefore hurtful.

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    (Original post by ,,,,)
    Problem Solved?
    Don’t play cupid stupid, sorry about the last bit lol I just have been doing that lately.


    Problem not solved .
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    (Original post by lou 22)
    Don’t play cupid stupid, sorry about the last bit lol I just have been doing that lately.


    Problem not solved .
    Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommu, WHAT?!?!?..................HIII

    Haha, just an idea? Even though it won't happen, you two might hit it off!

    Let me play cupid, stupid!
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    (Original post by ,,,,)
    Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommu, WHAT?!?!?..................HIII

    Haha, just an idea? Even though it won't happen, you two might hit it off!

    Let me play cupid, stupid!

    Love the stewie reference .

    You may be right, doubt it though .

    I wont be stupid you can play cupid .
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    (Original post by lou 22)
    Love the stewie reference .

    You may be right, doubt it though .

    I wont be stupid you can play cupid .
    Haha thanks! Gooo for it! Crap he's anonymous, hmmm.

    Have fun dodging my arrows bruh I'm an expert!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's not like me to come on the internet and make posts like this, which is why it's anon. I'm a 21 year old, going on 22. As with many self-conscious people on this forum, I'm single, and yes, a virgin. I've never been in a relationship with a girl, but I've never really gone out actively looking for one.

    To be honest, I've only ever really fancied three girls. I'm a quiet person and am not really likely to approach someone. It's only really now that I'm thinking that I'm ready for a relationship.

    But, I don't really know as many people since I've left Uni. At sixth form, I had quite a wide circle of both male and female friends who I saw regularly. At Uni, my friends again were quite evenly split between males and females. I was happy just having them as friends and never really thought anything more.

    I've now come back home from Uni. My friendship group is now smaller. My Uni friends now live in different cities and we see each other rarely. At home, I only really see the males now. At work, a lot of people are my own age, but I would consider them as colleagues and not friends.

    Anyway, to the point, with my friendship group going smaller, I'm wondering how to reverse this trend. I feel ready for a relationship, but have no idea where to start looking. I was wondering where the people of TSR found their partners? Would it be worth looking into dating websites, or should I stay offline for this?

    As an aside, I'm quiet a shy and reserved person, particularly around new people and in new situations. I was wondering about people who may have been in similar situations, and if/how they overcame similar issues.

    Apologies for the slight rambling, but I'm a bit of a dating novice
    Sorry but your not allowed a relationship. If you can't figure it out don't bother.
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    (Original post by holmes221)
    Sorry but your not allowed a relationship. If you can't figure it out don't bother.

    Rude.

    OP, get out of you comfort zone and try as much as you can to approach girls. They're everywhere! Approach them with this thought in mind 'for every 10 no's, there will be a yes'.
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    (Original post by catsis)
    Rude.

    OP, get out of you comfort zone and try as much as you can to approach girls. They're everywhere! Approach them with this thought in mind 'for every 10 no's, there will be a yes'.
    This is good advice! I guess it is? It might hurt his confidence if he get's 10 no's though? But when that yes comes, it will be worth it!
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    (Original post by ,,,,)
    This is good advice! I guess it is? It might hurt his confidence if he get's 10 no's though? But when that yes comes, it will be worth it!
    Exactly. It gives you strength not to give up.
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    Oh god, please don't harass women everywhere as implied by an above post.

    My brother started up salsa in order to meet women, you could always take up a new activity? (I'm guessing salsa was my bro's choice because there was likely to be a majority of women.) Also, nothing wrong with Tinder/internet dating, and they're a good way to get out there and get your confidence up talking to new people.
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    I'm in a similar position to you, having recently graduated university and lost quite a bit of contact with my university friends. Oh, and also single.

    The best way your going to find a potential partner, is by meeting new people and getting to know them. The worst thing you can do is set off on the mindset that you have to find a girlfriend/boyfriend in order to be happy. Instead, focus on meeting new people and really getting to know them, since this will expand your group of friends and lead to more opportunities.

    Confidence is probably the most important thing, so you're going to have to go out of your comfort zone for this one. You don't have to approach girls in clubs, but you need to be willing to strike up conversation with people you've just met. It's all practise, so just have a quick chat with cashiers at shops and other people you don't normally speak to, and this will help with confidence as well as making conversation.

    Online dating isn't a bad idea if you want to start meeting new people with similar intentions, but just be careful.
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    (Original post by ,,,,)
    Haha thanks! Gooo for it! Crap he's anonymous, hmmm.

    Have fun dodging my arrows bruh I'm an expert!

    Damn, your hopes of playing cupid have been squashed .

    I am agile so bring it .
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    (Original post by lou 22)
    Damn, your hopes of playing cupid have been squashed .

    I am agile so bring it .
    CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! I'm actually being serious, I'm getting some bows ready as I type.

    I really hope you can run and have quick reflexes, we shall see :rolleyes:
 
 
 
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