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    Hi. I'm posting this on a new account as I don't really want this on the one I use...

    I just got home to a letter saying I had been rejected by Oxford, and as you can imagine, it was quite disappointing. Academically I did well (GCSE mostly A*s, 4As at AS) and I thought that the interviews were good (obviously they weren't). I'm not one of those cocky people who just expected to get in, but equally I thought that my application was good enough that i could perhaps actually get in.

    I didn't really want to go anywhere else. For the course I was applying to, I always preferred Oxford, and I worked so hard trying to get there. I spent hours reading and reading and doing so much work towards my subject, I pretty much devoted the last 6 months entirely to this and blocked everything else out. Getting rejected is awful and I feel like **** and like I've let everyone down.

    To everyone else who has got rejected, how have you dealt with it? I'm lying on my bed and am so depressed. I have never felt so awful and don't know what to do. I could always reapply if my A2s are good, but being rejected sends out the message '"you're **** and we don't want you. Go away", so there might not even be any point.

    I'm so lost
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    Hi,
    The first paragraph pretty much applies to me perfectly as well; I've got good grades, and felt that I'd done well enough to possibly get in.
    I was disappointed at first, as I saw Oxford as being the 'best' university, and I really loved the college whilst I was up there for the interview. But I realise that Oxford is probably not the best uni for me, and perhaps I mainly wanted to go there because it sounded impressive. In reality, I think I'd really struggle with the workload and pressure, and I would probably hate my time there: the only person I know at Oxford is in that situation.
    I'm now feeling better about going to a 'normal' uni (Bristol)- I think I'll have a much better time, and it's still very much a decent uni!
    So I guess what I'm saying is that although the rejection is tough, there are definitely upsides to not going to Oxford.


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    Hi,
    In the same boat as both of you; thought I had a decent chance, but they can't accept everyone! I'm obviously really disappointed and my school were really rooting for me. (bit scared to tell my teachers and friends tomorrow)
    I feel a bit lost too! But you have to remember we did brilliantly to get as far as we did and will hopefully have a great time at our other unis. I personally made sure I was excited about them too by applying to year abroad courses, which is something oxford don't offer! But annoyingly I'll have to learn how to cook now!
    Its ok to be upset, especially when you have devoted so much time to it. Try to think about what you've gained from the process; all the experiences of staying there and being grilled on your subject. Its definitely given me a lot and made me better at my subject!
    I hope you find your way again
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    Hey :-)

    I'm actually really relieved about being rejected from Oxford. I know I was not as set on going there in the first place but let me at least explain why I'm happy about not getting in.

    1. There is a lot of stigma about having been rejected from Oxford. I mean come on, we have our own wikipedia page! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxbridge_reject It's a lot easier for me to deal with it when I notice that actually most of the pain comes from having to carry the reject badge from now on.
    2. You learn more from being rejected than you do from being accepted. Yeah maybe the people who got in might get a better education in the long-term, but getting the offer itself will not build you up the way getting rejected does. Honestly I'd rather be resilient than well-educated, but that's my personal opinion.
    3. I finally got rid of these stupid expectations. I felt like everyone around me thought I would get in, and it really brought me down. Getting a rejection helps me give my own personal middle finger to what other people want or expect from me.
    4. Most importantly, I got a healthy dose of humility from it. I don't feel like I have to be better than anyone else or 'prove myself'. I noticed a lot of people were incredibly gifted for their subject and I feel genuinely happy for the people that got in!

    Once you can let go of this, which you eventually will, it will feel so much easier. I don't know if this helps you but I hope it does!
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    (Original post by Karoel)
    Hey :-)

    I'm actually really relieved about being rejected from Oxford. I know I was not as set on going there in the first place but let me at least explain why I'm happy about not getting in.

    1. There is a lot of stigma about having been rejected from Oxford. I mean come on, we have our own wikipedia page! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxbridge_reject It's a lot easier for me to deal with it when I notice that actually most of the pain comes from having to carry the reject badge from now on.
    2. You learn more from being rejected than you do from being accepted. Yeah maybe the people who got in might get a better education in the long-term, but getting the offer itself will not build you up the way getting rejected does. Honestly I'd rather be resilient than well-educated, but that's my personal opinion.
    3. I finally got rid of these stupid expectations. I felt like everyone around me thought I would get in, and it really brought me down. Getting a rejection helps me give my own personal middle finger to what other people want or expect from me.
    4. Most importantly, I got a healthy dose of humility from it. I don't feel like I have to be better than anyone else or 'prove myself'. I noticed a lot of people were incredibly gifted for their subject and I feel genuinely happy for the people that got in!

    Once you can let go of this, which you eventually will, it will feel so much easier. I don't know if this helps you but I hope it does!
    Thanks everyone for the replies

    I really agree with your 3rd point. Everyone around me thought I'd get in without a problem and had such high expectations, which put a lot of pressure on me and ended up being totally crushing. Having to say 'I didn't get in' to people is probably going to be worse than not actually getting in itself.
 
 
 
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