Loneliness and Depression at university
Hey guys,
Sorry for the long story.
I started a 5 year medicine course in Manchester in 2013. The first semester of 1st year went really well and I was beginning to enjoy university life with a small group of friends; since i returned from my xmas break in January last year everything changed. I have always been incredibly close to my family and have had issues with my self-esteem from a young age, with some social anxiety and difficulty making friends.
I was feeling very lonely and depressed in January being away from my family and home life; i only had made 2-3 true friends, but near towards the end of the year they also distanced themselves from me as we did not agree on the type of house we wanted to share for the next year. So I was approached by an acquaintance (who i thought was my friend at the time) to move in with him and his friend next year; they were all medics and i had made decent friends with them so thought it would be a good idea.
However, things got from bad to worse. We went on holiday together during the summer and there were several arguments between us; it was like living with them in a dorm made me realise what was about to come. Despite my gut feeling, I moved in with them last September. Constant arguments and bickering (as well as harassment from them knocking on my door at night and talking about me in corridors, as-well as demanding money from me) led to my depression getting worse.
In december last year, i finally decided to move out despite not finding a replacement for my tenancy, so losing 2 months rent (£800) until a new tenant has been found. The private student halls i'm living in at the moment is a block of international students, with whom i have no communication and feel even more isolated; my family is in london so i spend every weekend there despite it being so expensive my parents are helping me financially. Despite all my issues, i managed to pass my 1st year with distinctions and merits; but 2nd year is too demanding academically.
I don't think I can cope with the course anymore, and am seeing a psychologist and my GP (who doesn't think medication is necessary at this stage). I'm not sure what to do; should i leave my course due to its effect on my mental health? (when it's not the course but everything but that!?)
Thanks for reading
Sorry for the long story.
I started a 5 year medicine course in Manchester in 2013. The first semester of 1st year went really well and I was beginning to enjoy university life with a small group of friends; since i returned from my xmas break in January last year everything changed. I have always been incredibly close to my family and have had issues with my self-esteem from a young age, with some social anxiety and difficulty making friends.
I was feeling very lonely and depressed in January being away from my family and home life; i only had made 2-3 true friends, but near towards the end of the year they also distanced themselves from me as we did not agree on the type of house we wanted to share for the next year. So I was approached by an acquaintance (who i thought was my friend at the time) to move in with him and his friend next year; they were all medics and i had made decent friends with them so thought it would be a good idea.
However, things got from bad to worse. We went on holiday together during the summer and there were several arguments between us; it was like living with them in a dorm made me realise what was about to come. Despite my gut feeling, I moved in with them last September. Constant arguments and bickering (as well as harassment from them knocking on my door at night and talking about me in corridors, as-well as demanding money from me) led to my depression getting worse.
In december last year, i finally decided to move out despite not finding a replacement for my tenancy, so losing 2 months rent (£800) until a new tenant has been found. The private student halls i'm living in at the moment is a block of international students, with whom i have no communication and feel even more isolated; my family is in london so i spend every weekend there despite it being so expensive my parents are helping me financially. Despite all my issues, i managed to pass my 1st year with distinctions and merits; but 2nd year is too demanding academically.
I don't think I can cope with the course anymore, and am seeing a psychologist and my GP (who doesn't think medication is necessary at this stage). I'm not sure what to do; should i leave my course due to its effect on my mental health? (when it's not the course but everything but that!?)
Thanks for reading
Original post by Anonymous
Hey guys,
Sorry for the long story.
I started a 5 year medicine course in Manchester in 2013. The first semester of 1st year went really well and I was beginning to enjoy university life with a small group of friends; since i returned from my xmas break in January last year everything changed. I have always been incredibly close to my family and have had issues with my self-esteem from a young age, with some social anxiety and difficulty making friends.
I was feeling very lonely and depressed in January being away from my family and home life; i only had made 2-3 true friends, but near towards the end of the year they also distanced themselves from me as we did not agree on the type of house we wanted to share for the next year. So I was approached by an acquaintance (who i thought was my friend at the time) to move in with him and his friend next year; they were all medics and i had made decent friends with them so thought it would be a good idea.
However, things got from bad to worse. We went on holiday together during the summer and there were several arguments between us; it was like living with them in a dorm made me realise what was about to come. Despite my gut feeling, I moved in with them last September. Constant arguments and bickering (as well as harassment from them knocking on my door at night and talking about me in corridors, as-well as demanding money from me) led to my depression getting worse.
In december last year, i finally decided to move out despite not finding a replacement for my tenancy, so losing 2 months rent (£800) until a new tenant has been found. The private student halls i'm living in at the moment is a block of international students, with whom i have no communication and feel even more isolated; my family is in london so i spend every weekend there despite it being so expensive my parents are helping me financially. Despite all my issues, i managed to pass my 1st year with distinctions and merits; but 2nd year is too demanding academically.
I don't think I can cope with the course anymore, and am seeing a psychologist and my GP (who doesn't think medication is necessary at this stage). I'm not sure what to do; should i leave my course due to its effect on my mental health? (when it's not the course but everything but that!?)
Thanks for reading
Sorry for the long story.
I started a 5 year medicine course in Manchester in 2013. The first semester of 1st year went really well and I was beginning to enjoy university life with a small group of friends; since i returned from my xmas break in January last year everything changed. I have always been incredibly close to my family and have had issues with my self-esteem from a young age, with some social anxiety and difficulty making friends.
I was feeling very lonely and depressed in January being away from my family and home life; i only had made 2-3 true friends, but near towards the end of the year they also distanced themselves from me as we did not agree on the type of house we wanted to share for the next year. So I was approached by an acquaintance (who i thought was my friend at the time) to move in with him and his friend next year; they were all medics and i had made decent friends with them so thought it would be a good idea.
However, things got from bad to worse. We went on holiday together during the summer and there were several arguments between us; it was like living with them in a dorm made me realise what was about to come. Despite my gut feeling, I moved in with them last September. Constant arguments and bickering (as well as harassment from them knocking on my door at night and talking about me in corridors, as-well as demanding money from me) led to my depression getting worse.
In december last year, i finally decided to move out despite not finding a replacement for my tenancy, so losing 2 months rent (£800) until a new tenant has been found. The private student halls i'm living in at the moment is a block of international students, with whom i have no communication and feel even more isolated; my family is in london so i spend every weekend there despite it being so expensive my parents are helping me financially. Despite all my issues, i managed to pass my 1st year with distinctions and merits; but 2nd year is too demanding academically.
I don't think I can cope with the course anymore, and am seeing a psychologist and my GP (who doesn't think medication is necessary at this stage). I'm not sure what to do; should i leave my course due to its effect on my mental health? (when it's not the course but everything but that!?)
Thanks for reading
I was sorry to read about your challenging situation and how despondent you're now feeling about everything. Kudos to you, though, for being so honest about your situation - that takes considerable guts for anyone in your situation, and I view it as a positive step. As someone who's dealt with precisely the same issues, and spent some time on SSRIs, I know the sort of thing you're going through. I shan't bore you with my own history (which is long and complex, but PM me if you're curious) but in the end I decided that, for me personally, studying a distance learning course from home, where I can be surrounded by (very supportive) family and friends was by far the best thing for me - even though a part of me still felt that I could give mainstream, away-from-home uni' a good 'go'.
As I say, do message me if you want to talk in more detail, as I am always happy to listen and advise. It may very well be that things improve for you on their own, even if it's quite gradual, but you should also think about whether you might better-suited to studying from somewhere much nearer home.
Hi, I'm sorry that your feeling that way but you should definitely not give up your course if its everything else making you feel that way. First of all you need to make your university aware of your situation (contact student support or your uni disabled students department) it is imperative that your uni knows about your situation and give you the correct support.
Secondly is it possible to switch rooms i.e. another room in halls or maybe another halls altogether?
Also have you thought about a leave of absence? This will give you the time needed to breath and then commence your studies when your feeling more stable?
Secondly is it possible to switch rooms i.e. another room in halls or maybe another halls altogether?
Also have you thought about a leave of absence? This will give you the time needed to breath and then commence your studies when your feeling more stable?
