I posted a few days ago. I met up with a guy who is nearly twice my age (I'm 24, he's 40) and stayed over at his. We kind of made it explicit that we would happily engage in sexual relations in text before meeting, but it never happened (only mild intimate things like touching). I wasn't so nervous because he has seen me in person before, I met him on a social networking site about 3 years ago, and we were both going to the same festival, so we met up in person. Things were fine, and obviously he liked me enough to carry on speaking with me after that occasion. So a year passed, and because I was travelling up north, we arranged for me to stay there. We are both kind of shy, and we were both aware of that.
The night wasn't awkward, I mean there was good conversation and we got on great. The morning after I went to the train station and he hugged me and kissed me goodbye. But lacking with self confidence, I naturally assumed sex never happened because he wasn't attracted to me. So, I left it a day or two, and plucked up the courage to message him. I thanked him for the night, and for the birthday present he got me, and that I hope things wouldn't be awkward between us. He replied and said of course not etc. I didn't want to just leave it at that, as deep down I wanted to know why we never got intimate. So in a jokey way, I asked him why things didn't 'develop'. He replied saying that he wasn't very well. In retrospect, it does add up. He did go to the toilet quite a lot, and he was drinking water, and stuff he said on the day, such as only having soup for breakfast, obviously in retrospect may be indicative that he was feeling ill. So I message back saying he should have told me, and he hasn't replied. I mean, it was a good day before I viewed his first reply to me, and I daren't see if he has been online and 'seenscoped' me.
I deactivated my Facebook a few weeks ago, not related, but I just wanted some time away from it. I went on it last night and did notice that on Monday he only posted one status, and since then there has been nothing, so that may suggest he isn't well.
I know he's a nice guy, and he's mature. I know when I asked him in a round about way why we never had sex, he wouldn't say 'because I wasn't attracted to you.' But, I would much rather him say that. He could have easily said he was shy or whatnot, so I cannot work out whether he is actually ill, or it's a cover up.
Where shall I go from here? I sent the last message, and he hasn't replied yet. We play on the same game as well, and he hasn't been online. Would he go through all that trouble just to distance himself? Even on Facebook when I'm not even on there? I just don't know if I believe he was ill, and I'm beating myself up about it because he didn't like me in person even though we've met before.
x Turn on thread page Beta
Is he being nice, when really he didn't like me? watch
- Thread Starter
- 08-01-2015 19:44
- 08-01-2015 19:46
I would wait for his reply, you don't want to come across as clingy.