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Why are you single?

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Reply 100
Because of baby face. I frequently get taken for a tall 14 year old. I'm 18.
And I find it really hard to outwardly express any interest in anyone.
Probably doesn't help the first and only boy I had a crush on is now gay. (as i found out a week ago...)
Original post by kenni12
What's that supposed to mean?


It means I agree with what you said or it applies to me. Especially bold

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Original post by Dr Pesto
Does anyone else think this is a strange thing to ask someone? I've been asked why I don't have a girlfriend a couple of times already this year, and I never really know what to say in response. It's as if, in many people's eyes, being in a relationship should be the default for human beings, and if you aren't in one you should have a reason or excuse for yourself.

I'm comfortable being single, but I can't help going on the defensive when somebody asks me why I am, even though I know sometimes it's said almost as a compliment. Does anyone else feel like this?


We can't all be suave and goodlooking like you mate.
Original post by ChaoticButterfly
You make it sound like you buy them from a shop.


It's not that hard to find a girl.
Theres this pattern that's happened in my life. I fall in love too deeply, the people I have fallen always fall for me too at the start, and it's really intense and amazing... but then they back off because I can't play it cool, I can't manipulate anyone or lie about the fact I really like them, I can't act disinterested when actually I'm fascinated. So they got bored of me and cheat. I find out they cheat and we break up. This is what usually happens. I also have no example of how a relationship functions since my parents were at loggerheads my entire existence, and I have no aunts or uncles to observe in a relationship. So maybe that's why I fail in every relationship I've ever been in. I don't want to fall again because I am highly sensitive, despite all my facades, and I get easily hurt.
Personal choice from having a messy break up and that I'm not sure I'm ready to trust another yet. I do find the guy I attract are too forward and rush things which makes me bolt :frown: so I'd rather be friends with guys and hang out with them than have them be a boyfriend.


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Haven't found the right one - most I have come across either want a rebound relationship, or casual sex! I went down the FwB route, and I actually haven't enjoyed it - constantly feeling dirty thereafter 'the deed', cheap and used.

All I want is a decent bf - not asking for much, clearly I am though!
I'm 19 now and have never been in a relationship. This might have bothered me before, but I have a longtime friend/classmate (10 years) who is basically a male version of myself. There are definitely feelings. I'm happy to take it slow.
I asked the same to one of my old friends and he was like ; "Pockets are empty".
Reply 109
Original post by Lwin
Because of baby face. I frequently get taken for a tall 14 year old. I'm 18.
And I find it really hard to outwardly express any interest in anyone.
Probably doesn't help the first and only boy I had a crush on is now gay. (as i found out a week ago...)


Well I imagine he was always gay, so it's not like you "turned" him or anything.
Reply 110
Original post by OU Student
When I was at uni, (I was 20, btw) someone had made this huge issue out of me being single, saying how if I didn;t find someone now, I'd never find someone. She then went on to talk about me having kids and other stuff.

I'm happy being single. If it happens, it happens. But if it doesn't, then so what? I can't say I'm bothered.


Was it an older member of your family? Because I'm finding that whenever I speak to my Grandma and aunties, they have want to have that kind of conversation with me, increasingly as I get older.
I have high standards. Not impossibly high but I like a guy to be very educated and reasonably good looking. I have been asked out many times but never by someone I would ever consider. Basically, I'm too fussy. But it's better than settling
Original post by Dr Pesto
Was it an older member of your family? Because I'm finding that whenever I speak to my Grandma and aunties, they have want to have that kind of conversation with me, increasingly as I get older.


Nope. It was someone I lived with who was a few years younger than me. I think my parents have kinda accepted that I have no interest in relationships.
Original post by Dr Pesto
That's also something I've never been terribly good at. I think it's because my father is very reserved in stereotypically English way, and I was the same for a long time.


So ur no longer afraid to open up?
Reply 114
Original post by Anonymous
So ur no longer afraid to open up?


No afraid, but I still find it hard to share my feelings with people. But that no longer comes from a place of insecurity like it did when I was a teenager; now it's more like I'm learning.

That was pretty deep for a Saturday night.
Original post by omegaSQU4RED
That was more of a cynical joke than anything, I commented on a thread like this before and someone jokingly insinuated that I'd be less likely to meet people because of me being a PhD student, especially in a STEM subject.


I have been informed that it is actually an attractive quality apparently.

Who knew :dontknow:

I went through an entire physics degree pretty much, thinking it was a negative attribute :P
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by ChaoticButterfly
I have been informed that it is actually an attractive quality apparently.

Who knew :dontknow:

I went through an entire physics degree pretty much, thinking it was a negative attribute :P


I suppose there's a bit of this "you do maths? You must be clever" type of thing, when actually you don't need to be clever to be able to do and study maths, you just need to put in the work.
because everyone bullies me and hates me. Also im ugly and noone at school would want to go out with someone lyk me
and coz im autistic
Original post by omegaSQU4RED
I suppose there's a bit of this "you do maths? You must be clever" type of thing, when actually you don't need to be clever to be able to do and study maths, you just need to put in the work.


Certainly the case with me :sigh:

I'm just good at parrot fashion remembering techniques and methods. It does make you seem like a genius to those who can't do maths though :biggrin:

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