I think I need a bit of advice - I have been an idiot
I have been having some friendly banter & flirting with this guy who I see at work for around 2 months. I am definitely attracted to him.
One day, my work friend asked me if I liked him as she had noticed how I act around him i.e. blush a little. I accepted that I did but was unsure how he felt. She thought I should try to give it a go.
My friends have been telling me to flirt more with him & I find it extremely hard. I'm not one of those people who can flirt easily - I'm a little shy and self-conscious when I flirt.
MY PROBLEM: SInce talking to my friends about him & acknowledging that I like him - I've become too self-conscious and I am unintentionally being rude and ignoring him!! Apparently, I did this already with him recently as he told me jokingly, when I went up to speak to him, that "he wasn't speaking to me anymore as I had ignored him" - I made it clear that it was not the case. Now I am scared that the way I have acted has put him off me completely.
For example, my friend is sitting nearby and I see the guy I like, lets call him Y & he walks by and says "hi, how are you?" I don't look at him properly & just mumble quietly "hi....good good" and then walk away!!!
This is not what I typically do! After that, my friend told me that Y had a slightly upset & confused expression on his face. And that she felt sorry for Y - which made me feel bad - as I was NOT intending to do that.
A little while after, I needed to ask him a work-related question and when I asked him if I can, he says (in front of his senior colleague) that " X, you only try to talk to me when you need something from me". And instead of flirting - I basically told him I haven't had much time, it was not intentional & he shouldn't get offended. I also didn't say goodbye to him when I left the department as I usually do.
I've realised how stupid I have been and thought that I just have to be normal with him & forget about the rest of it all - including my work friends.
So today, I see him at work whilst chatting to my friends - I say "Hi Y" and he says absolutely nothing - just looked at me. I am pretty sure he heard me say him. And I actually think he is annoyed with him & now ignoring me.
Please tell me what I should do? He is such a nice guy and I would hate to not speak to him.
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Have I missed the chance for a relationship? watch
- Thread Starter
- 08-01-2015 22:56
- 08-01-2015 23:08
go up to him and show him this thread....he'll take u back in a jiffy!
- 08-01-2015 23:09
Don't worry and just do whatever you feel is best. You can't get someone else to answer a personal question.
Offline21ReputationRep:Very Important Poster
- Very Important Poster
- 08-01-2015 23:10
Get him an apology bear if you can. No one can resist the cuteness of those things.
Otherwise I would suggest writing a note on those sticky things. Something along the lines of 'I'm really sorry. I did some silly things and I wish we could start over. Would you fancy meeting up at the pub? X.
- Thread Starter
- 09-01-2015 20:47
Thanks for the advice everyone.
Saw him again today - I said "Hi Y... how are you?" He did respond but he was definitely frosty with me and didn't speak properly to me or smile, tried a bit of small talk but it was very limited. He was a bit stressed with work so that does not help matters. I asked him later if he was ok and he said he was fine....but he definitely did not look it.
I know I deserve it for the way I have acted by ignoring him. But I hope if I continue to try and talk to him - he will either mention the fact that he is was annoyed at me and then that will give me an opportunity to apologise or just eventually forgive me for how I acted.
Do you think there is anything more I can do?