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Do many girls think like this? watch

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    I developed a crush for a girl who doesn't "quite" see me romantically.

    We are almost polar opposites. I am not very affectionate, I am not very popular with girls (I am introverted and quiet so it's not easy to approach me) and I am very serious about my studies (studying towards a PhD).

    She on the other hand is very affectionate (she always wants to hug and kiss me, she calls me "super cute" all the time, she plays with my hair, etc), she is very social and annoyingly popular with guys (I understand that is normal for someone who has her looks - she's the prettiest girl I know - but I am still bothered by it) and she's not serious about her studies (she's quite intelligent though).

    When I told her I liked her she replied that she liked me too but "not *quite* like that". I didn't fully understand so I asked her to explain. She told me that she will likely end up with someone like me but right now she doesn't want a relationship (she's 21). Apparently, that doesn't mean no guys, it means she has fwb or ONS with guys she likes but nothing exclusive.

    Is this thinking common among girls? do you consider some guys to be dating or bf material but not short-term flings?
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    >She told me that she will likely end up with someone like me but right now she doesn't want a relationship (she's 21).

    Can see where this is going :teehee:
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    >She told me that she will likely end up with someone like me but right now she doesn't want a relationship (she's 21).

    Can see where this is going :teehee:
    What...?
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    Just forget about her and move on. Contrary to Hollywood, polar opposites with the attributes you mentioned rarely attract and work.
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    (Original post by LordFarquaad)
    What...?
    If you have seen the TV show, The Big Bang Theory, don't be Leonard Hofstadter
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    If you have seen the TV show, The Big Bang Theory, don't be Leonard Hofstadter
    What...?
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    If you have seen the TV show, The Big Bang Theory, don't be Leonard Hofstadter
    I agree! The girl is flirting with you but then she doesn't want to date you and the chances are she isn't going to until she stops having fun with all the guys she's having flings with now. I'm sorry to break it to you, but she's not worth the wait in my opinion. You sound like a great guy - intelligent with a great future ahead of you and she sees you as the 'settling' type. As in the type she'd end up with but not for a long while yet. So why should you put your romantic life on hold just for her? There are other - more deserving girls out there for you. I wouldn't want to be the last choice for anyone. Hope this helps!
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    (Original post by manjotboyal)
    I agree! The girl is flirting with you but then she doesn't want to date you and the chances are she isn't going to until she stops having fun with all the guys she's having flings with now. I'm sorry to break it to you, but she's not worth the wait in my opinion. You sound like a great guy - intelligent with a great future ahead of you and she sees you as the 'settling' type. As in the type she'd end up with but not for a long while yet. So why should you put your romantic life on hold just for her? There are other - more deserving girls out there for you. I wouldn't want to be the last choice for anyone. Hope this helps!
    Somebody actually understood the point I was making.
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    Is it common? I don't understand why that's relevant. This is the girl you like and there are reasons why you might not be able to take it further with her because you have different priorities at the moment. I don't see how it being common or uncommon has any effect on your future with or without her.
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    Welcome Squad
    You're better than her OP.
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    Somebody actually understood the point I was making.
    Just because you watch ****ty sitcoms like The Big Bang Theory doesn't mean everyone else does. Next time you have a point to make, just say it.
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    (Original post by JohnnytheFox)
    Just because you watch ****ty sitcoms like The Big Bang Theory doesn't mean everyone else does. Next time you have a point to make, just say it.
    I probably watch less TV than most


    In my experience, the only guys who hate the show, are those for whom it reminds them of their painful inadequacies.
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    She wants to f*ck around.

    You're boyfriend material, not f*ckbuddy material. Simple.

    She's not in the same place as you, so you need to move on from her. Even if you talked her round, you'd be worried about whether she is being faithful, and even if she is, you would be hung up on her 'past' with other guys,and the attention she gets, and her friendships with other guys, etc...
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    (Original post by manjotboyal)
    I agree! The girl is flirting with you but then she doesn't want to date you and the chances are she isn't going to until she stops having fun with all the guys she's having flings with now. I'm sorry to break it to you, but she's not worth the wait in my opinion. You sound like a great guy - intelligent with a great future ahead of you and she sees you as the 'settling' type. As in the type she'd end up with but not for a long while yet. So why should you put your romantic life on hold just for her? There are other - more deserving girls out there for you. I wouldn't want to be the last choice for anyone. Hope this helps!
    I agree with this. I did have FWB relationships for about 6 months, then settled down, but I think she's letting her hair down for a while yet. You'll find someone else, I'm sure
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    I probably watch less TV than most


    In my experience, the only guys who hate the show, are those for whom it reminds them of their painful inadequacies.
    Or those who find it woefully unfunny.
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    (Original post by Ebony19)
    Is it common? I don't understand why that's relevant. This is the girl you like and there are reasons why you might not be able to take it further with her because you have different priorities at the moment. I don't see how it being common or uncommon has any effect on your future with or without her.
    Umm, I'm painfully aware that I have no future with her. I've known her for 2 years now, we're very close so I know a lot of...details (that I wish I never knew) about her life. She has not been in a serious relationship since she was like 17 - I know she's not gonna be in one with me either. So I was not asking whether I have a future with her.

    It's relevant because I haven't been as devastated in my life and if many girls think like her, I want to avoid feeling this in the future.
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    (Original post by LordFarquaad)
    Umm, I'm painfully aware that I have no future with her. I've known her for 2 years now, we're very close so I know a lot of...details (that I wish I never knew) about her life. She has not been in a serious relationship since she was like 17 - I know she's not gonna be in one with me either. So I was not asking whether I have a future with her.

    It's relevant because I haven't been as devastated in my life and if many girls think like her, I want to avoid feeling this in the future.
    You can't know what any one girl is gonna think like because every girl is different. No one can give you a summary on the way girls think. At the end of the day why do you even want anything serious from someone who doesn't want anything serious from you? Oh that's right, you want her exactly because she doesn't want anything serious from you. Look up 'guys like the chase' on google, it will show you that the basis of your attraction is based on unattainability. You could never have a serious romantic relationship with this girl and thats entirely why you want her. As soon as you understand the basis of your stupidity on this matter, and that there is nothing special about her, you will be able to overcome the problem. Good luck
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    It seems like she's messing you around to be honest; move on and find someone else.
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    if she dont like you make her like you
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    (Original post by matthewduncan)
    if she dont like you make her like you
    That sounds pretty dangerous
 
 
 
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