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I feel way too lonely watch

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    It's horrible. I can't sleep and laying in bed just makes me feel so much more lonely than I am. It makes me love think stuff that I usually push away because of my hectic days.

    There was once a time where I used to be really popular, I was well known and I had a lot of friends, a few of which were my 'best friends'. Over the years I drifted away from them and just recently I've had to walk away from my to 'best friends', and now I just feel like I'm left with nothing. I act strong for the majority of the times but its times like tonight where I feel so weak. Where I wish I had someone. Where I miss my previous relationship, even though I pretty much hate my ex and all she did to me. Where I miss my friends even though I know they aren't really my friends.

    I think it's more the idea of having a relationship and true friends that I miss. It's believing that I'm cared for, like I did for so many years.

    This feeling will go sooner or later but it'll come back again. Whenever it comes back it comes back stronger and harsher and I don't know how much longer I can deal with this.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's horrible. I can't sleep and laying in bed just makes me feel so much more lonely than I am. It makes me love think stuff that I usually push away because of my hectic days.

    There was once a time where I used to be really popular, I was well known and I had a lot of friends, a few of which were my 'best friends'. Over the years I drifted away from them and just recently I've had to walk away from my to 'best friends', and now I just feel like I'm left with nothing. I act strong for the majority of the times but its times like tonight where I feel so weak. Where I wish I had someone. Where I miss my previous relationship, even though I pretty much hate my ex and all she did to me. Where I miss my friends even though I know they aren't really my friends.

    I think it's more the idea of having a relationship and true friends that I miss. It's believing that I'm cared for, like I did for so many years.

    This feeling will go sooner or later but it'll come back again. Whenever it comes back it comes back stronger and harsher and I don't know how much longer I can deal with this.
    :hugs: Sorry to hear you're going through a tough time, hopefully things improve in time.
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    I could have written that word for word. Honestly, I feel the exact same. PM me if you want to vent, I'm sure I'll understand and be able to relate to you.

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    (Original post by Afghan Warrior)
    I could have written that word for word. Honestly, I feel the exact same. PM me if you want to vent, I'm sure I'll understand and be able to relate to you.

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    'Word for word', I hope not - my grammar there was woeful haha

    To be honest theres not much to vent about, nothing is wrong as such. It's just a really really really terrible feeling that really makes me wish I hadn't had to walk away from so many people

    (Original post by Precious Illusions)
    :hugs: Sorry to hear you're going through a tough time, hopefully things improve in time.
    Hopefully
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    Me too

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    (Original post by Illegal Algebra)
    Me too

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    Anything to vent about?
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    Remember that your family care about you the way you wish you had friends that did
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's just a really really really terrible feeling that really makes me wish I hadn't had to walk away from so many people
    Why did you have to push so many people away?
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    (Original post by Ebony19)
    Why did you have to push so many people away?
    Because I had recently begun to realise that these so called "best friends" were actually far from it, and that our relationships had been characterised by my efforts. It took me long enough to realise this but when I took a step back and looked at the whole thing it was just really evident that they just kept taking things, and never gave anything back. I was only contacted if they needed money, or favours. When I contacted them for a chat, or to go out I got nothing. It got to a point where it was much harder to speak to them than not to.

    So I respected myself enough to walk away from such friendships where I wasn't valued, where I wasn't happy, where I was constantly being used and where I wasn't.. Growing if that makes sense.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Because I had recently begun to realise that these so called "best friends" were actually far from it, and that our relationships had been characterised by my efforts. It took me long enough to realise this but when I took a step back and looked at the whole thing it was just really evident that they just kept taking things, and never gave anything back. I was only contacted if they needed money, or favours. When I contacted them for a chat, or to go out I got nothing. It got to a point where it was much harder to speak to them than not to.

    So I respected myself enough to walk away from such friendships where I wasn't valued, where I wasn't happy, where I was constantly being used and where I wasn't.. Growing if that makes sense.
    I get what you mean I'm guilty of falling into these same patterns of holding on to crappy relationships and friendships with people who don't want the best for me. Now that I'm in a crappy place myself I'm realising the extent of how many of my friendships and relationships are like this.

    I suppose we just have to be proactive where we can and find different ways to connect with people. I also think variety helps. Like not just having two friends who are similar in nature and you do the same things with.

    Are you at school, uni, work?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Because I had recently begun to realise that these so called "best friends" were actually far from it, and that our relationships had been characterised by my efforts. It took me long enough to realise this but when I took a step back and looked at the whole thing it was just really evident that they just kept taking things, and never gave anything back. I was only contacted if they needed money, or favours. When I contacted them for a chat, or to go out I got nothing. It got to a point where it was much harder to speak to them than not to.

    I know this is late, so if you dont want to think about it again, just don't read this, i don't want to make you think about something that dont feel upset about on a normal day to day basis. (though maybe it could help to tackle it when arent feeling so vulnerable?)

    So I respected myself enough to walk away from such friendships where I wasn't valued, where I wasn't happy, where I was constantly being used and where I wasn't.. Growing if that makes sense.
    I really respect you for that. It's a very hard thing to do.
    I was put in a similar situation by my old friend, but it did not end as clearly as that, they tried to get rid of me because I wasn't like that and wouldn't take any credit for the failed friendships, then the other friends just took her side and left me, like I meant nothing to them.
    It was a very bad time, but luckily i had someone there for me, so its extremely admirable that you did this yourself. I had to forced away by being ignored and abandoned when I need them.
    I understand how you get low sometimes, for a long time i would randomly get upset about it and miss them and wish i was friends with them, whilst knowing that they weren't really my friends and they never really understood or valued my opinion (that can be quite strong) anyway.
    All it took was time, and meeting new people, luckily i was in college and had one friend left who i not spoken to for a while, who introduced me to people that im still friend with like two years later, and my boyfriend of two years as well.
    Whats your situation?
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    I know how you feel, I'm going through something similar. PM me if you want to talk


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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's horrible. I can't sleep and laying in bed just makes me feel so much more lonely than I am. It makes me love think stuff that I usually push away because of my hectic days.

    There was once a time where I used to be really popular, I was well known and I had a lot of friends, a few of which were my 'best friends'. Over the years I drifted away from them and just recently I've had to walk away from my to 'best friends', and now I just feel like I'm left with nothing. I act strong for the majority of the times but its times like tonight where I feel so weak. Where I wish I had someone. Where I miss my previous relationship, even though I pretty much hate my ex and all she did to me. Where I miss my friends even though I know they aren't really my friends.

    I think it's more the idea of having a relationship and true friends that I miss. It's believing that I'm cared for, like I did for so many years.

    This feeling will go sooner or later but it'll come back again. Whenever it comes back it comes back stronger and harsher and I don't know how much longer I can deal with this.
    Take up sport or partake in activities you enjoy, that way you meet people that are likely to have similar interests to yourself It will also bring back self-esteem which is never bad thing eh

    That being said, I think there is a difference to being alone, and being lonely. Whats so bad about being alone? You miss your friends a lot, have you totally lost contact? Tried reaching them, asking how they're doing or what they're up to?

    Anyways, losing friends is part of life as we all go in different directions of course. But its also a chance to make new ones! Try to stay positive and don't lose hope :console:
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    Me too. Even the person I considered my best friend never sees me and never makes any effort to speak to me.

    (Original post by awkwardshortguy)
    Remember that your family care about you the way you wish you had friends that did
    Not necessarily.
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    (Original post by sr90)
    Not necessarily.
    Not necessarily but it's true in most cases and a fact people can forget.
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    (Original post by Ebony19)
    I get what you mean I'm guilty of falling into these same patterns of holding on to crappy relationships and friendships with people who don't want the best for me. Now that I'm in a crappy place myself I'm realising the extent of how many of my friendships and relationships are like this.

    I suppose we just have to be proactive where we can and find different ways to connect with people. I also think variety helps. Like not just having two friends who are similar in nature and you do the same things with.

    Are you at school, uni, work?
    Yeah, see the problem is that even though I have a pretty hectic schedule, these thoughts still come to me. They come when I lay in bed and have a moment or two to think, and thats when it really effects me. I obviously try hard to take my mind off it and to sleep it off but that's easier said than done.

    I'm at uni (final year), and I'm working part time. From a distance you can never tell how lonely I am, I don't even like talking about it because when I do it just brings out inner emotions
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    (Original post by Lulalou)
    I really respect you for that. It's a very hard thing to do.
    I was put in a similar situation by my old friend, but it did not end as clearly as that, they tried to get rid of me because I wasn't like that and wouldn't take any credit for the failed friendships, then the other friends just took her side and left me, like I meant nothing to them.
    It was a very bad time, but luckily i had someone there for me, so its extremely admirable that you did this yourself. I had to forced away by being ignored and abandoned when I need them.
    I understand how you get low sometimes, for a long time i would randomly get upset about it and miss them and wish i was friends with them, whilst knowing that they weren't really my friends and they never really understood or valued my opinion (that can be quite strong) anyway.
    All it took was time, and meeting new people, luckily i was in college and had one friend left who i not spoken to for a while, who introduced me to people that im still friend with like two years later, and my boyfriend of two years as well.
    Whats your situation?
    I'm sorry you've had to deal with such let downs - it's the worst feeling ever when people let you down time and time again. I get that too, but its more the idea of having someone there who genuinely cares that I miss.

    I do meet new people but most are at a stage in their life where they already have the ones they need and aren't really willing to be approachable. Theres only so much I can do from my part before I start coming across like a creep, you know? I'm very approachable and very sociable too, I genuinely have no trouble in socialising and like I mentioned above, from a distance you can never tell how I really feel.

    Where things started looking up for you they went down hill for me (not to sound like I'm begging for sympathy). My ex girlfriend of five years and I parted, and then after a year trying to build myself up again after feeling like I was emotionally destroyed, I had to walk away from my friendships. That feeling of being left with absolutely nothing has now hit me twice, it seems like when things begin to get better.. they only do for the worst.

    I still count on things improving though, ya know.. 1 step backwards to take 2 steps forwards sort of thing.
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    (Original post by sr90)
    Me too. Even the person I considered my best friend never sees me and never makes any effort to speak to me.



    Not necessarily.
    Really bro? From chatting to you on the footy threads it doesn't seem like it at all.

    Takes the piss though doesn't it, when someone you've considered to be a huge part of your life actually turns out to be so selfish and just so unbothered.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah, see the problem is that even though I have a pretty hectic schedule, these thoughts still come to me. They come when I lay in bed and have a moment or two to think, and thats when it really effects me. I obviously try hard to take my mind off it and to sleep it off but that's easier said than done.

    I'm at uni (final year), and I'm working part time. From a distance you can never tell how lonely I am, I don't even like talking about it because when I do it just brings out inner emotions
    Aw sounds like you're really busy but it's not good enough because you're having making enough good emotional connections. You need to carve out some time to devote to forging better relationships. So I know you feel lonely but can you think of who you're closest to at the moment?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Take up sport or partake in activities you enjoy, that way you meet people that are likely to have similar interests to yourself It will also bring back self-esteem which is never bad thing eh

    That being said, I think there is a difference to being alone, and being lonely. Whats so bad about being alone? You miss your friends a lot, have you totally lost contact? Tried reaching them, asking how they're doing or what they're up to?

    Anyways, losing friends is part of life as we all go in different directions of course. But its also a chance to make new ones! Try to stay positive and don't lose hope :console:
    I think it's just a constant feeling of unhappiness that probably stems from my break up. Its the feeling of envy when I look at friendships that have lasted. The sadness when you know that had things been a little bit different, I probably would have been the same social little monster that I once was, where I had loads of people to turn to. It's the feeling of having many people to no one.

    I've tried to contact people from my past but they've all seemed to have moved on, and part of that is my own fault.. for letting them go.

    Hope is the only thing I derive some sort of happiness from, I know that I will eventually bump in to someone. Just hope it happens soon because quite frankly, I'm sick of being alone. And I hope its not someone who lets me down again
 
 
 
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