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    It's a bit long so I apologise in advance
    I'm in my final year at uni, and have been playing the field a bit. One of my flat mates had introduced me to his best friend ( guy1) who also happens to come to my uni. We ended up kissing and cuddling, consistently happening at most uni event, all of which our mutual friends are aware of.
    He told me before he wasn't interested in a relationship - but we resolved things and continued to do the same old thing kissing and ending up sleeping at his for the night, no sex though. I ended up kissing another mutual friend of ours and some foreplay - but was told to keep it a secret because guy1 supposedly likes me and it could ruin their relationship. The last time we all went out, me and guy 1 did what we usually did, except he was like ' everyone's telling me your a virgin" my flat mate rung him whilst I was with him- giving advice to him- we continued fooling about until he got up and was like 'I need to think' and wanted to call my flat mate again. I was waiting for him and then I decided to just get up and walk. On my way out, his girl flat mate rushed to help me and was like what's happened? Telling me he doesn't want to hurt anyone and genuinely likes me and cares for me. He just gets confused when he likes someone, and playing hard to get. I went back to him that night, nothing happened. I'm left confused, I don't know what he truly wants. Despite saying he wants freedom he has feelings too , I just don't understand what this means.

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    (Original post by Retroandbeyond)
    It's a bit long so I apologise in advance
    I'm in my final year at uni, and have been playing the field a bit. One of my flat mates had introduced me to his best friend ( guy1) who also happens to come to my uni. We ended up kissing and cuddling, consistently happening at most uni event, all of which our mutual friends are aware of.
    He told me before he wasn't interested in a relationship - but we resolved things and continued to do the same old thing kissing and ending up sleeping at his for the night, no sex though. I ended up kissing another mutual friend of ours and some foreplay - but was told to keep it a secret because guy1 supposedly likes me and it could ruin their relationship. The last time we all went out, me and guy 1 did what we usually did, except he was like ' everyone's telling me your a virgin" my flat mate rung him whilst I was with him- giving advice to him- we continued fooling about until he got up and was like 'I need to think' and wanted to call my flat mate again. I was waiting for him and then I decided to just get up and walk. On my way out, his girl flat mate rushed to help me and was like what's happened? Telling me he doesn't want to hurt anyone and genuinely likes me and cares for me. He just gets confused when he likes someone, and playing hard to get. I went back to him that night, nothing happened. I'm left confused, I don't know what he truly wants. Despite saying he wants freedom he has feelings too , I just don't understand what this means.

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    er seems to me he's scared of commitment
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    (Original post by Retroandbeyond)
    It's a bit long so I apologise in advance
    I'm in my final year at uni, and have been playing the field a bit. One of my flat mates had introduced me to his best friend ( guy1) who also happens to come to my uni. We ended up kissing and cuddling, consistently happening at most uni event, all of which our mutual friends are aware of.
    He told me before he wasn't interested in a relationship - but we resolved things and continued to do the same old thing kissing and ending up sleeping at his for the night, no sex though. I ended up kissing another mutual friend of ours and some foreplay - but was told to keep it a secret because guy1 supposedly likes me and it could ruin their relationship. The last time we all went out, me and guy 1 did what we usually did, except he was like ' everyone's telling me your a virgin" my flat mate rung him whilst I was with him- giving advice to him- we continued fooling about until he got up and was like 'I need to think' and wanted to call my flat mate again. I was waiting for him and then I decided to just get up and walk. On my way out, his girl flat mate rushed to help me and was like what's happened? Telling me he doesn't want to hurt anyone and genuinely likes me and cares for me. He just gets confused when he likes someone, and playing hard to get. I went back to him that night, nothing happened. I'm left confused, I don't know what he truly wants. Despite saying he wants freedom he has feelings too , I just don't understand what this means.

    I
    Okay, well first off, I want to ask you if you liked guy 1, and if so, why you were kissing one of his friends (and keeping it a secret might I add)?
    Secondly, the guy sounds genuinely worried or nervous about doing something wrong that would drive you away...I wouldn't say he had commitment issues, if anyone did, it would be you.
    Wait...how can he be 'confused' when he likes a girl and yet can still play 'hard to get'...The idea in itself that a person who is confused about something, will then start doing something bold (especially in this situation) doesn't make a whole lot of sense.
    Now, if he's calling his friend for advice on what to do (and not really hiding it well) it doesn't help your argument that he's playing hard to get..
    The only thing at all that even remotely points to him having comittment issues is the last sentence and when he said he doesn't want a relationship...which in comparison with the rest of the text makes no sense whatsoever.
    On the whole, I don't think you'd be right for eachother...mostly due to your kissing of his friend, which -let's be honest now- doesn't show the best qualities in you...either you're wayyyyy to unattached to people, or you're...lets just say not the most ethical person. If you like him (i speculate due to your 'contant' cuddling and kissing) then I see no reason for you to start kissing other people.

    Just tell him you don't want a relationship with him, because this will not end well if you get together.
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    actually yeah as what DKeane says... How come you ended up kissing a mutual friend? O.o
    and foreplay as well...
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    (Original post by amlchn)
    actually yeah as what DKeane says... How come you ended up kissing a mutual friend? O.o
    and foreplay as well...
    well that's only because guy 1 had hurt me weeks ago, and started ignoring me. I didn't do it out of spite or because I felt like it, but genuinely because me and guy 2 are good friends and both wanted to see if it would work but we both agreed we are better off as friends....didn't realise guy 1 was going to be in he picture ever again, after he ended seeing me. The only reason why I agreed to keep it quiet, was to keep everyone happy and I didn't want drama.
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    Well maybe you should really sit down and talk to guy 1 about it then and take it slow? You don't have to get into a relationship immediately. You can always have sort of a dating period which means like you go on dates and bond and learn more about each other without actually being officially a couple. If it really doesn't work out then just make it clear once and for all that a relationship cannot happen between the both of you. I don't know if you and guy 1 have ever gone on dates but go for dates and don't cuddle or kiss or anything, just go out together and talk and walk or something.
 
 
 
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