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    I'm in a bit of a difficult situation and I'm not sure about how to deal with it.

    I've had a really tough term at Uni and one of my best friends has been helping me through it. The only problem is that I have started to fall for my best friend (dangerous line I know). I don't see myself ever being with him and a relationship would just ruin our friendship but this crush is causing me to avoid him and feel awkward around him. I can't create distance because I still really need him to help me get through this tough time (he has been there for me from day 1). I'm pretty sure he's in love with someone else anyway and that hurts...

    I don't know how to quash this crush once and for all and go back to being friends. I've been assured by other people that it will go with time but it's just really hard to deal with right now with everything else going on (it's the last thing I need). Does anyone know how I can deal with this without ruining my friendship? He's very dear to me and I don't want either of us to get hurt...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm in a bit of a difficult situation and I'm not sure about how to deal with it.

    I've had a really tough term at Uni and one of my best friends has been helping me through it. The only problem is that I have started to fall for my best friend (dangerous line I know). I don't see myself ever being with him and a relationship would just ruin our friendship but this crush is causing me to avoid him and feel awkward around him. I can't create distance because I still really need him to help me get through this tough time (he has been there for me from day 1). I'm pretty sure he's in love with someone else anyway and that hurts...

    I don't know how to quash this crush once and for all and go back to being friends. I've been assured by other people that it will go with time but it's just really hard to deal with right now with everything else going on (it's the last thing I need). Does anyone know how I can deal with this without ruining my friendship? He's very dear to me and I don't want either of us to get hurt...
    I'm going through a similar situation myself. Feel free to PM me if you wish to talk about this in further detail.
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    Sounds to me that you need to get a better spread in who you share your feelings with. This guy's there for you and by the sounds of it each and every day. That's nice. That's the kind of friend you need and don't want to go messing things up with, especially if he has his mind set on someone else.

    So what do you do? You chat to more people, see who's trustworthy and share some of your feelings with them. Eventually your reliance on this guy will slowly ease off. He won't be that central figure any longer. It'll hurt at first because there's a part of you that's attracted to the feeling of self-absurdness he gives you, though once you're sharing your feelings with others you'll slowly wean yourself off this guy, and you may even find someone else that's available in the process.

    Telling this guy you like him isn't a bad idea, though I certainly don't think it's the best. If he does start feeling awkward, or scared even, about talking to you that could make this term even harder than it has already been. I say share the load, ease off him a touch and reach out to other people with other opinions on how to help you. It can't hurt
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm in a bit of a difficult situation and I'm not sure about how to deal with it.

    I've had a really tough term at Uni and one of my best friends has been helping me through it. The only problem is that I have started to fall for my best friend (dangerous line I know). I don't see myself ever being with him and a relationship would just ruin our friendship but this crush is causing me to avoid him and feel awkward around him. I can't create distance because I still really need him to help me get through this tough time (he has been there for me from day 1). I'm pretty sure he's in love with someone else anyway and that hurts...

    I don't know how to quash this crush once and for all and go back to being friends. I've been assured by other people that it will go with time but it's just really hard to deal with right now with everything else going on (it's the last thing I need). Does anyone know how I can deal with this without ruining my friendship? He's very dear to me and I don't want either of us to get hurt...
    If you actually have feelings for him, tell him. Having feelings doesn't ruin a friendship; actually friendship makes the best foundation for a good relationship, and if you're good friends already it could work very well and last a very long time.

    Just tell him. If he feels the same, he'll let you know. If he doesn't, he'll let you know - and when it's a guy there's a lot less 'risk' than were the positions to be reversed.
 
 
 
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