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Only turned on by shemales/sexually confused Watch

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    To compress things, with the exception of a drunken experimental mutual fellatio years ago, I've only ever had hetrosexual sex, but over the past couple of years I've found it harder to maintain an erection or get really turned on either while having sex with a woman, or watching straight porn. This may in part be due to depression.

    The only thing that really turns me on is shemale porn. I often fantasize about having sex with or being a shemale/woman and being penetrated by a man. The thing is, other the penis I don't find men attractive at all. I don't like a man's face or chest or whatever, but I could fellate a man. Good looking women can make me swoon, but I rarely want to **** one anymore.

    I thought maybe it might be a desire to be submissive, but I've always been extremely dominant in bed with women.

    I thought maybe about trying sex with a guy to see if it floats my boat, but I'm unsure how to proceed from here or how to interpret my desires/problems. Any advice/theories?
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    What treatment are you having for the depression? I wonder if it, or the lack of it, is a factor in all this.

    Human sexuality is delightfully diverse and different people like different things. They also often change over time.

    If you're not using porn, what does happen? Not being aroused or having fantasies? What of?

    Have you tried looking for a pre-op trans partner? Or for a man willing to just let you fellate him? Finding the latter is almost trivial in most places.
    • #2
    #2

    I am a guy and I am naturally feminine and have a girly face and body and there are loads of guys like you out there, dont worry. I have hips like a girl even a doctor said he hasnt seen it before. It drives guys wild
    • #1
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    #1

    (Original post by unprinted)
    What treatment are you having for the depression? I wonder if it, or the lack of it, is a factor in all this.

    Human sexuality is delightfully diverse and different people like different things. They also often change over time.

    If you're not using porn, what does happen? Not being aroused or having fantasies? What of?

    Have you tried looking for a pre-op trans partner? Or for a man willing to just let you fellate him? Finding the latter is almost trivial in most places.

    I've been on and off (mostly off) fluoxetine for my depression and have recently begun seeing a therapist, but its only been one session so far. She seems to think my depression is a result of self isolation and avoidance, but the session wasn't really long enough to determine anything. I always had bouts of depression but it has been really severe over the past year. My sex drive was definately higher before.

    Arousal without porn is only occasional, short lived and I'm never that hard. Some fantasies are about women, some about sucking ****, but I never really fantasise about kissing a man though wouldn't feel revulsion when doing so. Last year when I was having regular sex with various women, and was far less depressed, I still sometimes could only get hard if the sex was really violent.

    There is craigslist casual encounters. It would be easy enough to meet a guy from there, though most seem to be fat/ugly/hairy. If I ever save enough money I'd use a transexual escort definately. They tend to be expensive.
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    I think you might be a case of someone who enjoys the taboo. Typically people with this interest will start off with fairly vanilla sex, lose interest, and find something kinky and new to enliven the sex life. It's not merely a case of buying a couple's sex toy; it's something where you actively seek to have sex in some kind of 'abnormal' way. There are varying degrees of how far taboo it needs to be, and it depends on how great you feel the need to experiment is.

    Some people are attracted to the idea of forbidden love (an example would be incest) without being actually attracted to the person (in the context of incest, it's not the relative that's found attractive - more the idea of sleeping with the relative). Rather than being a specific fetish for something or someone, it's a short-lived fetish for something that'll usually change fast once the person has enacted the fantasy a few times.
    Your case is obviously less extreme than incest; but it would explain your attraction to the idea of sleeping with a man without being attracted to men. In the same way that you found you needed to have increasingly aggressive heterosexual sex to keep it 'interesting'.

    There's nothing wrong with this in principle, provided whatever fantasy you're enjoying doesn't cause (unconsensual) emotional or physical harm to others, and isn't illegal.
 
 
 
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