Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    At the weekend I got involved in a rather heavy debate about whether a wife would forgive her husband if she found out he had cheated on her with someone from work. (This is going on at my friend's workplace)

    I personally couldn't even imagine continuing with someone who had betrayed me- and in the case outlined above the husband has been telling someone at work that he could make them so happy etc, and for me that kind of emotional cheating is even more unforgivable...

    Would you/have you ever forgiven cheating?
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Queen Cersei)
    At the weekend I got involved in a rather heavy debate about whether a wife would forgive her husband if she found out he had cheated on her with someone from work.

    I personally couldn't even imagine continuing with someone who had betrayed me- and in the case outlined above the husband has been telling someone at work that he could make them so happy etc, and for me that kind of emotional cheating is even more unforgivable...

    Would you/have you ever forgiven cheating?
    ditto. The fact he's said that to some other girl would make me feel worthless.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    I'm in the process of being cheated on right now, and I'm yet to confront my girlfriend that I know.
    But as for forgiving her, no, I couldn't and wouldn't want to.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    I know of two people who have been married for 20+ and 40+ years who have forgiven, because they felt the alternative is worse.

    I couldn't forgive, I think.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Never. And if I did it would mean I lost my self respect.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Baloney)
    I'm in the process of being cheated on right now, and I'm yet to confront my girlfriend that I know.
    But as for forgiving her, no, I couldn't and wouldn't want to.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    That's horrible it must be really tough to face up to it but you should tell her you know soon because trust me you feel a wash of relief!
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    No forgiveness, why sell yourself short.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    A one off incident maybe, I could put that down to a moment of weakness. An on going affair? Not a chance.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Nothing is true until it is repeated.
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    This is why I don't believe in love but I think it's just attraction. If people cheat, and people don't forgive, then where is this supposed 'love' out of attraction? It's just attraction.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    Thankfully I've never been in this position but no, I don't think I could.

    In the short term I might be able to shove it to the back of my mind, but I know myself enough to know I don't think I could ever trust them fully again. Even if it was 'just a drunken mistake', that wouldn't really matter to me as it would play on my mind.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    Hell no. I deserve so much better than that.
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Nope. Never.
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    No. How do I know it won't happen again?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by RoyalMarine)
    This is why I don't believe in love but I think it's just attraction. If people cheat, and people don't forgive, then where is this supposed 'love' out of attraction? It's just attraction.
    So are you saying that if someone can't forgive a cheating partner this is because they don't truly love them? Not being funny, just haven't heard this point of view before.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OU Student)
    No. How do I know it won't happen again?
    Exactly! I would spend every day in a fit of paranoia!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I wouldn't be able to. I suppose it depends exactly on what sort of relationship the parties involved are in.
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by Queen Cersei)
    Exactly! I would spend every day in a fit of paranoia!
    Indeed. I am not who generally has trusts issues, nor do I generally care who my partner is friends with, in terms of the opposite sex. (the majority of my friends are male, for example) But if you've cheated on me once, I'd be concerned that you're going to do it again and I don't think I could ever trust you enough to be with you.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    Nope.

    Even if I was with them for 60 years or something I'd show them the door.

    I'd never disrespect anyone and do that and I expect to be show the same courtesy.

    You've got to understand the sheer disrespect in messing about with someone else while you have someone you are with who loves and cares for you.

    They want to have their cake and eat it too.
    They want to mess about and get away with it.
    There is never an excuse. Ever.

    How hard is it to dump someone? Even by text 'It's over' then you are free to go and sleep with whoever. But you can't mess with someone's heart like that.
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Welcome Squad
    No. I've been cheated on, and I tried to forgive and forget, but it kept playing around in my mind. The disrespect. The placing me at risk of STDs. In this particular case, the disrespect towards others as well - it was with the girlfriend of his best friend. That best friend and his girlfriend had a little daughter together. That's a lot of messing up! In the end, I wondered who I was kidding. Why should I be with someone who does that sort of stuff? I broke up with him and am glad that I did. I met someone a whole lot better .
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: January 22, 2015
Poll
Do you agree with the PM's proposal to cut tuition fees for some courses?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.