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    I'm year 10, and the time has come for the SLT to pick prefects. The application has to be in by Friday. I'm a straight A/A* student, with a perfect behaviour record, and all of my teachers love me. Sounds great, right?
    except that I can't write applications to save my life, and the SLT don't know me. Our teachers don't get involved until the interview stage
    I was just wondering if I could have some feedback or tips on how to improve my current application letter.

    Dear Ms Costen,
    I am writing this letter in application for the position of Prefect, or perhaps Senior Prefect. Over the past four years, Brighton Hill school has helped me develop my education, and character. It has made me confident, has helped me make friends, and has also helped me to grow as a person. Prefects are essential in schools, carrying out numbers of vital tasks, and I think I am the right person to take on that responsibility.
    I would like to be (senior) Prefect, as the school has given me a number of things, from good qualities to an education, as I feel as though this role would be a perfect opportunity to repay it for all of the good it has done me in my time here. Also, I love to help others with anything, academic or not. I enjoy the sense of accomplishment, knowing that I’ve made a difference to other people’s lives. In addition to this, I like working with other people, of all ages; children younger than me, people the same age as me, or adults, too. I feel as though taking on the role of a (senior) Prefect would also help me develop my skills as a person even more, and I like to think that it builds a character. Also, I would like to become a (senior) Prefect as it would be taking on yet another position in the school, truly giving something back.
    Whilst in school, I am not majorly sporty or in any of those clubs, I am a Science Ambassador, which has given me experience with working with children of all ages. Last summer, we went to St Marks Primary School, and taught science to year fours. Not only did they learn, but so did I; I realised how important it is to communicate with others, working as a team. In addition to this, I am currently working in STEM club (science, technology, engineering and maths,) again, working in a team, leading my group through the project. Outside of school, although I have no job, I am looking for volunteer work, helping with less fortunate people. In the past, I’ve held mini fundraisers for charities such as Children in Need, raising hundreds of pounds. This helped me to see how fortunate I am, and how much of a necessity it is to help others, whether it be donating money or something as simple as time, to ensure they’re coping in whatever it may be, which is why I always help people, no matter who they are to me, or with what.
    I think that I include many essential qualities needed for the role of a Prefect, or Senior Prefect. I work well in teams, which is vital, especially when working with other prefects, pursuing tasks. Along with teamwork, goes leadership; I’m a confident, strong and fair leader. I can listen to others, as well as help them, which is needed when working alongside prefects, other students, or younger children.
    ((This is not finished, I have yet to finish the final paragraph, but if it needs a lot of work doing, I would rather get that done than finish it all now))
    Any feedback, positive or negative, would be appreciated; i'm new to this forum

    I've only given it a quick look, but a couple of things stand out:

    - Don't say stuff like 'I'm not majorly sporty' or 'I have no job'. It sounds awfully negative and it's probably better not to mention it.

    - It'd probably do you good to have a few more examples of your personal qualities. Saying 'I have good leadership skills' carries much more weight if you give an example of when you led something. Make sure you link it all together.

    - Personally I'd try to avoid writing in generalities. Every time you mention a quality of a good prefect, link it to you directly.

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