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    I went on four dates with a guy I met online, and then we slept together, about a day ago. How do I know whether it was just sex or whether he's interested in seeing me again? He didn't pressure me into it, checked I was happy to go all the way, and throughout the night kept asking me if I was okay and having fun. We also kissed, cuddled, napped, held hands, and he was concerned that I come, seemingly caring more about my pleasure than his. We were sleeping in a single bed and we both had work the next day. He left very early, and I'm concerned because I've heard this is a bad sign. When he left, he just said 'See you' without making reference to meeting up again.

    Usually, I don't hear from him after a date for about three days before he contacts me again either chatting or to say he'd like to see me again. Should I panic that I'm never going to hear from him again, based on the way he left things? Do guys really change their mind about a girl they're keen on if they don't enjoy the sex?
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    Nothing to worry about.
    Although if you were only with him for sex then I beg to differ
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    Nothing to worry about.
    Although if you were only with him for sex then I beg to differ
    No, I genuinely really like this guy and would love to get to know him better (something each of us said to the other after the first date, at which point he also said he doesn't necessarily want a serious relationship as he might be going away, but also doesn't just want a one-night thing). We spend hours chatting about politics, religion etc as we both like a good intellectual row. It may be silly, but this also leads me to believe he wants more than just sex. I find it so hard to tell nowadays, though.
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    He seems to be making all the 'first' moves. Why don't you ask him if he'd like to meet up again?
    Maybe you'll be able to tell if he's still interested by his response.
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    (Original post by Classified.)
    He seems to be making all the 'first' moves. Why don't you ask him if he'd like to meet up again?
    Maybe you'll be able to tell if he's still interested by his response.
    Interesting, what makes you say that?

    I've asked him out for the last two drinks, although he has then been the first to express the fact he's looking forward to it and then that he enjoyed the dates.

    If I don't hear from him, I think I'll text him! Thank you for your answer.
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    (Original post by Classified.)
    He seems to be making all the 'first' moves. Why don't you ask him if he'd like to meet up again?
    Maybe you'll be able to tell if he's still interested by his response.
    And yes, you're right - I'll be able to tell according to his response. I'm just so nervous I'm going to text him and hear nothing back; that happened to me once before (when I thought the guy was interested in me beyond sex) and it was awful.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Interesting, what makes you say that?

    I've asked him out for the last two drinks, although he has then been the first to express the fact he's looking forward to it and then that he enjoyed the dates.

    If I don't hear from him, I think I'll text him! Thank you for your answer.
    I suppose it's because of this statement: "Usually, I don't hear from him after a date for about three days before he contacts me again either chatting or to say he'd like to see me again."
    But it looks like it was the wrong assumption, I don't mean any offense by it.

    If he usually does wait around 3 days, there's still hope :P
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    (Original post by Classified.)
    I suppose it's because of this statement: "Usually, I don't hear from him after a date for about three days before he contacts me again either chatting or to say he'd like to see me again."
    But it looks like it was the wrong assumption, I don't mean any offense by it.

    If he usually does wait around 3 days, there's still hope :P
    Oh of course, I know you don't mean any offense, none at all taken! I was simply curious, it's always interesting to have an outside view on things, especially as I have a tendency to automatically assume the worst!
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    He ran for the hills.
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    well how long has it been if he usually messages after three days
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    (Original post by Enoxial)
    He ran for the hills.
    Do you think so?
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    (Original post by Guy Secretan)
    well how long has it been if he usually messages after three days
    Only a couple of days, so I am of course being premature in worrying. I was just concerned by his swift exit.
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    (Original post by GraceLawton)
    yes, yes it was
    Would you mind saying why you think so?
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    just relax he may or may not have just watch this space
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I went on four dates with a guy I met online, and then we slept together, about a day ago. How do I know whether it was just sex or whether he's interested in seeing me again? He didn't pressure me into it, checked I was happy to go all the way, and throughout the night kept asking me if I was okay and having fun. We also kissed, cuddled, napped, held hands, and he was concerned that I come, seemingly caring more about my pleasure than his. We were sleeping in a single bed and we both had work the next day. He left very early, and I'm concerned because I've heard this is a bad sign. When he left, he just said 'See you' without making reference to meeting up again.

    Usually, I don't hear from him after a date for about three days before he contacts me again either chatting or to say he'd like to see me again. Should I panic that I'm never going to hear from him again, based on the way he left things? Do guys really change their mind about a girl they're keen on if they don't enjoy the sex?
    Unless he really is into just increasing his 'number' and doesn't want to sleep with anyone twice, I would not start worrying - some of the responses here are just deliberately playing with your insecurity about this.

    "I really enjoyed X. Would you like to do it again?", where X = 'meeting up' and/or the sleeping together.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I went on four dates with a guy I met online, and then we slept together, about a day ago. How do I know whether it was just sex or whether he's interested in seeing me again? He didn't pressure me into it, checked I was happy to go all the way, and throughout the night kept asking me if I was okay and having fun. We also kissed, cuddled, napped, held hands, and he was concerned that I come, seemingly caring more about my pleasure than his. We were sleeping in a single bed and we both had work the next day. He left very early, and I'm concerned because I've heard this is a bad sign. When he left, he just said 'See you' without making reference to meeting up again.

    Usually, I don't hear from him after a date for about three days before he contacts me again either chatting or to say he'd like to see me again. Should I panic that I'm never going to hear from him again, based on the way he left things? Do guys really change their mind about a girl they're keen on if they don't enjoy the sex?
    English is not my native language but isn't "see you" a "reference to meeting up again"?

    EDIT: I'd strongly caution against taking advice from randomers on here. Don't take anything too seriously please.
    EDIT2: Exactly what unprinted said above.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We were sleeping in a single bed and we both had work the next day. He left very early, and I'm concerned because I've heard this is a bad sign.
    Am I missing something, or could he just have been leaving due to work?
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    (Original post by unprinted)
    Unless he really is into just increasing his 'number' and doesn't want to sleep with anyone twice, I would not start worrying - some of the responses here are just deliberately playing with your insecurity about this.

    "I really enjoyed X. Would you like to do it again?", where X = 'meeting up' and/or the sleeping together.
    Thank you for your response, it was reassuring. You're right, one can't take things too seriously on an internet forum. I think I will text him if I don't hear from in a few days, with something along the lines of your above suggestion.
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    (Original post by Cornelius)
    English is not my native language but isn't "see you" a "reference to meeting up again"?

    EDIT: I'd strongly caution against taking advice from randomers on here. Don't take anything too seriously please.
    EDIT2: Exactly what unprinted said above.
    I didn't think of that! You could well be right, especially as he also isn't a native speaker...
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    (Original post by TurboCretin)
    Am I missing something, or could he just have been leaving due to work?
    That could have been it, yes! I definitely seem to be over-thinking this...
 
 
 
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