Met A Guy I Really Like, But Not Good Enough For A Relationship...

I joined a sports club yesterday, and met a guy I really, really liked, even after talking to him once. We have a lot in common and he's really nice and flirted with me a bit. I will be seeing him twice a week there.

I was really nervous around him though, because I'm not sure if I'm "good enough" for a relationship or even ready. I'm 21 but have never had a boyfriend, dropped out of uni and spent a year struggling with depression, and just need to get my social life back on track. I also have major family issues to sort out. I am attractive and nice but what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?

I am trying to focus on myself but can't stop thinking about him and how much I want him :frown:

I won't be good enough for a boyfriend for ages, probably.

Help, what should I do? :frown:

Reply 1

MinionMogul

1

Thought this was you saying he's not good enough lol.

Trust me, you needn't over-think this in the way some might. Only person you need to think about is you, and whether you would really be happy in an reship yet, or need more time to recover.

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 2

Momma's Kumquat

11

Keep your head up.

See how things go -- if you keep having positive interactions, go and have a coffee with him or grab a drink.

Everyone has their problems, just because of the nature of yours, it doesn't mean you don't deserve a relationship or happiness with somebody else.

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 3

username47781

20

Original post by Anonymous

I joined a sports club yesterday, and met a guy I really, really liked, even after talking to him once. We have a lot in common and he's really nice and flirted with me a bit. I will be seeing him twice a week there.

I was really nervous around him though, because I'm not sure if I'm "good enough" for a relationship or even ready. I'm 21 but have never had a boyfriend, dropped out of uni and spent a year struggling with depression, and just need to get my social life back on track. I also have major family issues to sort out. I am attractive and nice but what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?

I am trying to focus on myself but can't stop thinking about him and how much I want him :frown:

I won't be good enough for a boyfriend for ages, probably.

Help, what should I do? :frown:

All you can do is maybe get to know him more and see what happens, just go with the flow.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Momma's Kumquat

Keep your head up.

See how things go -- if you keep having positive interactions, go and have a coffee with him or grab a drink.

Everyone has their problems, just because of the nature of yours, it doesn't mean you don't deserve a relationship or happiness with somebody else.

Thanks, so just stay friends for now? :smile:

I'm worried that even being friends I'll end up liking him more but he likes me less if he finds out I was depressed :frown:

I'm also quite shy around him even tho generally super confident..

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Rock Fan

All you can do is maybe get to know him more and see what happens, just go with the flow.

I defo want to continue as friends, worried he'll like me less if he finds out I had depression etc. tho :frown:

I wish I was less conventionally attractive tbh - no Cara Delavingne, but sometimes guys seem attracted to me for my looks but I think they'd be turned off by my depression/lack of a degree.

Reply 6

Momma's Kumquat

11

Original post by Anonymous

Thanks, so just stay friends for now? :smile:

I'm worried that even being friends I'll end up liking him more but he likes me less if he finds out I was depressed :frown:

I'm also quite shy around him even tho generally super confident..

Just get to know him. After a short while, suggest you grab a coffee, and just take it from there.

Don't over think or second guess anything, you're worrying about what might happen, but what if he does like you?

The only way you'll find out is if you make a brave choice. :smile:

Reply 7

withlove

14

"what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?" If a guy doesn't like the good, the bad and the ugly then he really isn't worth your time at all. There is someone for everyone and you never know, he may just be that person!

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I joined a sports club yesterday, and met a guy I really, really liked, even after talking to him once. We have a lot in common and he's really nice and flirted with me a bit. I will be seeing him twice a week there.

I was really nervous around him though, because I'm not sure if I'm "good enough" for a relationship or even ready. I'm 21 but have never had a boyfriend, dropped out of uni and spent a year struggling with depression, and just need to get my social life back on track. I also have major family issues to sort out. I am attractive and nice but what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?

I am trying to focus on myself but can't stop thinking about him and how much I want him :frown:

I won't be good enough for a boyfriend for ages, probably.

Help, what should I do? :frown:

What did you like about him?
And rate his looks out of 10?

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Momma's Kumquat

Just get to know him. After a short while, suggest you grab a coffee, and just take it from there.

Don't over think or second guess anything, you're worrying about what might happen, but what if he does like you?

The only way you'll find out is if you make a brave choice. :smile:

Thanks

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by withlove

"what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?" If a guy doesn't like the good, the bad and the ugly then he really isn't worth your time at all. There is someone for everyone and you never know, he may just be that person!

Thats true, thanks :smile:

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Foo.mp3

Everyone has their baggage honey. Nothing ventured.. 'n' all that :smile:

Good point, unfortunately there's a lot of stigma against dropping out of uni/not having a degree *and* being depressed. His parents (who are also at the club) are a bit strict/judgmental too (I could tell by the way they were talking about another person at the club, though he wasnt around at the time) and the last thing I need is peeps judging me for what Ive had to deal with. :smile:

Reply 12

DerMann

8

Original post by Anonymous

I joined a sports club yesterday, and met a guy I really, really liked, even after talking to him once. We have a lot in common and he's really nice and flirted with me a bit. I will be seeing him twice a week there.

I was really nervous around him though, because I'm not sure if I'm "good enough" for a relationship or even ready. I'm 21 but have never had a boyfriend, dropped out of uni and spent a year struggling with depression, and just need to get my social life back on track. I also have major family issues to sort out. I am attractive and nice but what if a guy doesn't like me for the other parts of me?

I am trying to focus on myself but can't stop thinking about him and how much I want him :frown: