Just need some advice

I'm at uni at the moment, have just started my second year, and I'm really loving my independence. Thing is, my parents seperated in August last year, and now my dad's being a bit clingy - always asking if I will go over to his to stop for a night or two, calling quite a lot and making me feel quite guilty if I say I can't.

I'm having huge financial issues at the moment (stupid ****ing loans people) and I'm working all the hours I can outside of uni. My uni work load has tripled this year and I'm already behind because of working.

My dad's trying to guilt me into coming over for a few days, when I really have to work, and I can't miss any more uni (I've been off most of this week with tonsillitis). I don't want my dad to think I don't love him or want to see him, but I feel so guilty about saying no.

He's trying to convince me to have him and my brother over for tea on Saturday, and I know I wont be up for it - I'm working a 9 hour shift till 8 on Saturday and then I've got an essay to do a tonne of research for AND i'm in all day at work on Sunday. He seems to think I'm fobbing him off with excuses which is making me feel worse.

I don't know what to do :frown:

Reply 1

Navajo

To be honest I know it sounds harsh... but in my experience and opinion you have to look after number 1!!

just have it out with your Dad... if he's nice then he'll understand and he may even help you out financially.

Play the "I love you, but I need help to move on in life" card. Of course your Dad is important in life but Uni is more important at the moment, if you end up failing the year due to finance then it's such a waste!! Just have it out with him and tell him how you feel... I'm sure he'll understand... and if not then what kind of Dad is he...? (didn't mean it to sound that harsh)

Reply 2

Leisure17

I guess you can make it quite clear to your father that you will not have time on sat. Why not tell him you appreciate that he likes your company, but your schedule is a bit heavy right now. Sort of: "I will come as soon, as I can, promise" (and then keep the promise)