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    Hi,

    A few days ago, me and a friend applied to become a Head Boy and as we had to do campaigns to be voted, during lesson he got his 'IT friends' to make him a full social media campaign and to also make posters and badges, and I never even thought of doing my campaign yet.

    The problem was that yesterday I was very rude to him by refusing to help him and I think it was just jealousy that I think he'd get the role.

    What should I do? Should I apologise to him? I feel really guilty now about it and he is a very close friend too, so it must have come to a shock that I was quite aggressive.

    The Head Boy thing has got me to be really competitive and aggressive at the same time, and it's not about that. I shouldn't really apply for that and drop out of the ballot but I'm not sure because I'm guilty for being rude to a friend.

    Please help!
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    Does said friend mean more to you than a 'title' that you'll hold for max a year? This is the obvious yet fundamental question to consider. I would apologise and perhaps explain your outburst.
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    Me and my friend applied for head girl. We were very competitive too, even though I may have not wanted to help her campaign, I wasn't rude to her.
    I suggest you apologise however explain that you don't want to give help if it will be a disadvantage to your campaign.

    Good luck
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    Yes, you should definitely apologise
    If you really are competitive and want to win, you should probably get a move on with your campaign too

    However, don't let something as irrelevant as being Head Boy ruin friendships, and most importantly ruin you

    PM me if you want more advice
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    #1

    Thank you guys. Yeah, you all make a good point; I should really apologise to him and explain my outburst. The competitiveness never hit me before, so I hope it doesn't ruin the friendship between us..I'll still and try to work on my campaign and hopefully have a bit more friendly competition.
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    Evening,

    I was in a similar boat for when I was applying for Head Boy, over 30 separate candidates applied for the Head Boy position. After the large group had been whittled down to 12, tempers started to flare. I was lucky enough to get Deputy Head Boy and one of my mates got Head Boy, it was good for both of us as we got along very well and this came across in speeches/events we completed at the school.

    Although I did not experience what 'you guys' did with a campaign/posters etc, our system just consisted of people voting for you and then the Head Master would have the final decision over the top 3.

    Anyway, competitiveness and competition is good for humans as it makes us achieve greater than would we would of done if just one single person always got the role in question. However, competition is not good if it starts to become personal and fuelled by jealously and anger.

    My advice is sincerely apologise asap, as a man who admits he is wrong looks stupid for a minute, but a man who does not admit he is wrong looks stupid for life. Besides if he is a true friend he will know your character and realise that it was something said in the heat of the moment and will all be forgotten by the weekend.
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    (Original post by JBurt)
    Evening,

    I was in a similar boat for when I was applying for Head Boy, over 30 separate candidates applied for the Head Boy position. After the large group had been whittled down to 12, tempers started to flare. I was lucky enough to get Deputy Head Boy and one of my mates got Head Boy, it was good for both of us as we got along very well and this came across in speeches/events we completed at the school.

    Although I did not experience what 'you guys' did with a campaign/posters etc, our system just consisted of people voting for you and then the Head Master would have the final decision over the top 3.

    Anyway, competitiveness and competition is good for humans as it makes us achieve greater than would we would of done if just one single person always got the role in question. However, competition is not good if it starts to become personal and fuelled by jealously and anger.

    My advice is sincerely apologise asap, as a man who admits he is wrong looks stupid for a minute, but a man who does not admit he is wrong looks stupid for life. Besides if he is a true friend he will know your character and realise that it was something said in the heat of the moment and will all be forgotten by the weekend.
    Thanks for your reply. Yeah competition is good and it's something I don't really come across that often, as I'd really like to compete with my friend. Jealousy shouldn't be a part of that, and a true friendship would actually mean working together to achieve greater. I'll sincerely apologise and I'll see how it goes - it's something that I don't want to regret.
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    Why would you help him with him campaign when you're going for the same position? I wouldn't expect, or even ask, someone I was competing against to help me beat them.
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    I find it remarkable that some kids actually cared about this.
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    Head boy? My goodness, the traditions are getting filthier by the year...
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    Just to add to what I previously said and others have...

    Go for what you want as a person, would you being Head or Deputy Head Boy, help you with your career path and/or personal goals. Yes, going for Head Boy makes your CV look a 'smidge' better than another candidate, but ultimately being a Head Boy/Girl is just a lot of work when you are in an already busy and important year of school.

    When I was deputy, yes I got a silly gold badge and a title, but apart from that it did not really help me, it only caused me more work as I had to deal with other pupils problems before addressing my own.

    My final advice is go for what would make you happy...If by chance you accidentally upset someone else be sorry, but remember you are doing this for yourself, not for other people. Personally, I would become a prefect, as it adds to your CV, but does not have the competition and work load of being a Head boy/girl

    And remember being a Head involves doing many speeches, events, staying late after school most days, helping pupils etc.

    And with WoodyMKC's, Twinpeaks &pjm600 replies, I strongly agree schools are becoming a competition now, not a place of happiness and learning, besides secondary school (although you may not think it now) is a very light and enjoyable experience to college and uni, enjoy and thrive in it as much as you can...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi,

    A few days ago, me and a friend applied to become a Head Boy and as we had to do campaigns to be voted, during lesson he got his 'IT friends' to make him a full social media campaign and to also make posters and badges, and I never even thought of doing my campaign yet.

    The problem was that yesterday I was very rude to him by refusing to help him and I think it was just jealousy that I think he'd get the role.

    What should I do? Should I apologise to him? I feel really guilty now about it and he is a very close friend too, so it must have come to a shock that I was quite aggressive.

    The Head Boy thing has got me to be really competitive and aggressive at the same time, and it's not about that. I shouldn't really apply for that and drop out of the ballot but I'm not sure because I'm guilty for being rude to a friend.

    Please help!
    It's not completely your fault that you got dragged into that kind of acting - the whole elections for HB/HG thing can be a total competition-fest, it's like the schools design it to bring out the worst in people and although they can be fun, they can also lead to breaking up of friendships. :sad:

    So yeah, don't make a huge thing of it, but find a way to say sorry that doesn't make it sound as if you really meant anything bad that happened and without blaming yourself too much. I'm sure you are both good people and you didn't really want to be mean or anything.
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    Well, yeh you should apologise.

    No one is going to care about your head-boy thing apart from your parents.

    Your friend will be there for life.
 
 
 
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