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Really struggling to talk to this guy watch

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    There's a guy at uni who I've always found attracted but never thought he was interested so dismissed, and who I've only spoken to him a couple of times. But a few months ago I added him on Facebook and since then he's commented on my statuses a lot (more than most other people's despite the fact that we barely know each other), and we started to have eye contact when we see each other at our society's club/social and I've seen him stare at me but I've always been too shy to say hi (and also still didn't think he was interested at this point and wasn't considering him romantically). But recently I've considered the possibility after lots of FB activity I said to myself I'd talk to him when I see him at our society's club night this Friday, but when I got there I literally walked straight past him in the door way without looking at him and then finally later on I made one comment to him but didn't know what else to say and that didn't really go anywhere, though he entertained what I said. I did see him looking at me after that a few times but it just seemed awkward and now I can't tell if I'm imaging things now that I've grown interested in him. I don't even know if he likes me and he probably doesn't think I like him either.

    But basically because I fail so badly at talking to him at nights out I'm considering talking to him at uni, cause we're in the same (small) campus (I see him sometimes but run away basically). I'm not actually sure why I find it so hard to talk to him. I guess I've always been unconfident with guys despite the fact that guys are usually attracted to me, but when it's someone I like myself and I just can't tell (I just find out when it's too late that they were in fact interested). I also find him quite eccentric and feel like I have to come up something 'cool' to say to him, but I just can't think of much. But I'm thinking if I see him on campus this week I'll try and talk to him. When he's on campus he's usually with his course mate also who I vaguely also know Any advice? Thanks!
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    Anyone?
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    He'll either be flattered that a girl has shown interest in him
    OR
    He already has a girlfriend
    (But you can still have a mutual friendship with him)

    You'll never know unless you try
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    There's a guy at uni who I've always found attracted but never thought he was interested so dismissed, and who I've only spoken to him a couple of times. But a few months ago I added him on Facebook and since then he's commented on my statuses a lot (more than most other people's despite the fact that we barely know each other), and we started to have eye contact when we see each other at our society's club/social and I've seen him stare at me but I've always been too shy to say hi (and also still didn't think he was interested at this point and wasn't considering him romantically). But recently I've considered the possibility after lots of FB activity I said to myself I'd talk to him when I see him at our society's club night this Friday, but when I got there I literally walked straight past him in the door way without looking at him and then finally later on I made one comment to him but didn't know what else to say and that didn't really go anywhere, though he entertained what I said. I did see him looking at me after that a few times but it just seemed awkward and now I can't tell if I'm imaging things now that I've grown interested in him. I don't even know if he likes me and he probably doesn't think I like him either.

    But basically because I fail so badly at talking to him at nights out I'm considering talking to him at uni, cause we're in the same (small) campus (I see him sometimes but run away basically). I'm not actually sure why I find it so hard to talk to him. I guess I've always been unconfident with guys despite the fact that guys are usually attracted to me, but when it's someone I like myself and I just can't tell (I just find out when it's too late that they were in fact interested). I also find him quite eccentric and feel like I have to come up something 'cool' to say to him, but I just can't think of much. But I'm thinking if I see him on campus this week I'll try and talk to him. When he's on campus he's usually with his course mate also who I vaguely also know Any advice? Thanks!

    either speak to him when you do see him alone, send him a note writing down your intentions e.g. to go for a drink with him, that you like him etc. or ask a friend to speak to him about you on your behalf, or ask a male friend to speak to him on your behalf - may be a bit easier and less awkward. good luck!
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    I know he's single as it says so on his facebook. And I *want* to try but I just don't know how to go about it.
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    I completely understand what you are going through,I had the same issues fortunately he talked to me...just try to be more interactive with him(or his friends)
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    You just have to go for it, in a way that doesn't look too aggressive. Hint you like him, but wait for him to make the move. That's what usually happens to me, anwyay. I notice a girl giving hints (it takes me a good while to figure out what she's playing at) and then when I'm certain she is interested, I'll approach her.
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    Thanks guys

    (Original post by Expired Potato)
    You just have to go for it, in a way that doesn't look too aggressive. Hint you like him, but wait for him to make the move. That's what usually happens to me, anwyay. I notice a girl giving hints (it takes me a good while to figure out what she's playing at) and then when I'm certain she is interested, I'll approach her.
    What sort of signals are you used to getting from girls? Like which ones are you not sure what they mean and which ones will make you feel like you have a green light to approach them?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks guys



    What sort of signals are you used to getting from girls? Like which ones are you not sure what they mean and which ones will make you feel like you have a green light to approach them?
    - looking at me longer than they should, and then when I glance back they aren't looking anymore
    - smiling more than usual around me, and slight differences in how they act around me compared to other guys (for instance, maybe a bit quieter, but willing to talk in a heartbeat)
    - ability to keep up conversation about ANYTHING: I go off on a tangent and the conversation topics end up being really strange/random. Each of my past-relationships I've had, my other half has been able to keep up with me.

    Those three are the ones I find subtle, but they hook me in and make me guess. When I begin to notice, things just progress naturally.

    Usually I notice the most when I can somewhat see that she treats me better than other guys - for instance she smiles more, she's happier to talk, she's slightly more flirtatious and careful not to give the game away, but she sometimes has (unintentional/intentional) slips that surprise me and show that she really, just may be interested in me.

    And by that I mean a slip of words. Like I used to work with a girl in RI and when I was trying on uniform and asking for her opinion she was like 'yeah, I prefer the shirt without the polka dots. Still hot though!' We ended up dating from side comments like these, but you have to make sure that those comments don't go unnoticed, and that there is a tinge of emotion in it, because it's easy to mistake it for just playing around when you intend it to be a deeper meaning.
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    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Expired Potato)
    - looking at me longer than they should, and then when I glance back they aren't looking anymore
    - smiling more than usual around me, and slight differences in how they act around me compared to other guys (for instance, maybe a bit quieter, but willing to talk in a heartbeat)
    - ability to keep up conversation about ANYTHING: I go off on a tangent and the conversation topics end up being really strange/random. Each of my past-relationships I've had, my other half has been able to keep up with me.

    Those three are the ones I find subtle, but they hook me in and make me guess. When I begin to notice, things just progress naturally.

    Usually I notice the most when I can somewhat see that she treats me better than other guys - for instance she smiles more, she's happier to talk, she's slightly more flirtatious and careful not to give the game away, but she sometimes has (unintentional/intentional) slips that surprise me and show that she really, just may be interested in me.

    And by that I mean a slip of words. Like I used to work with a girl in RI and when I was trying on uniform and asking for her opinion she was like 'yeah, I prefer the shirt without the polka dots. Still hot though!' We ended up dating from side comments like these, but you have to make sure that those comments don't go unnoticed, and that there is a tinge of emotion in it, because it's easy to mistake it for just playing around when you intend it to be a deeper meaning.
    Thanks makes sense, thanks!
 
 
 
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