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    #1

    Hi,

    I feel like I have so much going on....im making bad decisions and im worried about myself

    Basically, I am on my year abroad and have exams next week. Lately I have been skipping classes... but I have been working really hard independently and am aiming to do well in these exams. But part of the reason is I have become SO comfortable staying in my flat... and its like a cycle where I will just not go out. I have anxiety that if I walk into the exam they will say "sorry you missed too many classes, you cant do it". But I feel if i keep working hard on my own, then attend my exams, this suits me better for now...

    ...which bring me to the key reason i am not leaving the house.. i get uncomfortable and shy around people.. sometimes im fine, but i find social situations draning... and its all in another language so its harder....

    and lastly i am struggling with my sexuality. i am a girl and am bisexual.... well no one knows. i met a girl online from france and we occasionally skype.... i reallly really like her. first she was really flirty with me, and now she seems to just be friendly.. and she wants to do a skype voice call but i feel kinda nervous.... even though i want to. im scared she will see me as boring...

    welll basically, i have always focussed so much on my studies.. and been deatched from people. and suddenly i feel like i am emotionally needy and want someone else in my life.....

    so i feel just in a downhill slump.



    can someone advise me?
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    Hey

    ''But I feel if i keep working hard on my own, then attend my exams, this suits me better for now...'' If you're skipping classes that's really not good! Attend to all of them! -Unless impossible!

    It's fine to feel comfortable in your flat and chill out


    ''have anxiety that if I walk into the exam they will say "sorry you missed too many classes, you cant do it". '' You said you're skipping classes DON'T do that!!! You don't gain anything but stress from doing that!


    Uncomfortable and shy, That's totally fine Don't worry Don't let it weigh on you! You can fake confidence!! You say you have a language barrier? My advice would be to start out small is there someone who you can talk to in your flat? And become more fluent in that language? Maybe some online tools like ''Rosetta Stone'' - I have no idea if that's any good haha !

    Sexuality - It's okay to be bi-sexual seriously people around you are at the age that they won't judge and trust me you won't we the only one ! You don't have to stand in the middle of the pub and shout to the world you're BI, so please don't let that bring you down!

    ''im scared she will see me as boring...'' HEY Don't worry! Seriously if you carry on with not self-confidence you won't live a fun and enjoyable life! Life starts at the end of your comfort zone, you and the girl in France must have a few things in common, expand on those topics and when there's an awkward silence don't worry! I go through periods of not speaking to my best friend for 30mins (On skype voice call) and it's totally fine, once you find something you want to talk about expand on it, she will enjoy you making an effort believe me!

    You say you're focused on your studies, you know what that's excellent Smile about it be proud be happy, because not everyone will work as hard as you

    Finally you say you want someone in your life, but that means you will have to go through hardships to reach your goals its totally worth it! Try speaking to someone you know well? maybe someone on your course? Go upto them speak to them, see what they;re interests are, I mean if you're on the same course that's an interest right.

    I hope this helps, feel free to message me
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Andrew657Thomas)
    Hey

    ''But I feel if i keep working hard on my own, then attend my exams, this suits me better for now...'' If you're skipping classes that's really not good! Attend to all of them! -Unless impossible!

    It's fine to feel comfortable in your flat and chill out


    ''have anxiety that if I walk into the exam they will say "sorry you missed too many classes, you cant do it". '' You said you're skipping classes DON'T do that!!! You don't gain anything but stress from doing that!


    Uncomfortable and shy, That's totally fine Don't worry Don't let it weigh on you! You can fake confidence!! You say you have a language barrier? My advice would be to start out small is there someone who you can talk to in your flat? And become more fluent in that language? Maybe some online tools like ''Rosetta Stone'' - I have no idea if that's any good haha !

    Sexuality - It's okay to be bi-sexual seriously people around you are at the age that they won't judge and trust me you won't we the only one ! You don't have to stand in the middle of the pub and shout to the world you're BI, so please don't let that bring you down!

    ''im scared she will see me as boring...'' HEY Don't worry! Seriously if you carry on with not self-confidence you won't live a fun and enjoyable life! Life starts at the end of your comfort zone, you and the girl in France must have a few things in common, expand on those topics and when there's an awkward silence don't worry! I go through periods of not speaking to my best friend for 30mins (On skype voice call) and it's totally fine, once you find something you want to talk about expand on it, she will enjoy you making an effort believe me!

    You say you're focused on your studies, you know what that's excellent Smile about it be proud be happy, because not everyone will work as hard as you

    Finally you say you want someone in your life, but that means you will have to go through hardships to reach your goals its totally worth it! Try speaking to someone you know well? maybe someone on your course? Go upto them speak to them, see what they;re interests are, I mean if you're on the same course that's an interest right.

    I hope this helps, feel free to message me
    Thanks a lot for the reply, I really appreciate that.

    You are right that skipping classes is bad. Well I only have one more day of classes (tomorrow) so I am juat going to stick to my solo revision plan. My exams are next week, so I am going to try and work hard for them and do well.

    I am on my erasmus year so my grades dont count. But if i do well in these exams it will show to my advisor that im on the right track.

    Next term I am taking new classes, and my goal next term is to go to all my classes. I hope its ok that ive been bad at attendance so far

    And with the girl.... Maybe i will jiat focusss on my studies. I have a few friends here and after exams i will meet them more i guess.. Also i wanna to lots more travelling...

    Do u think this plan is ok? I just got myself on a bit f a downward spiral but i wanna do better next term
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    Yeah the plan sounds great It's fine for this to be a time of a ''downward spiral'' however you will learn from this (Don't skip classes haha I hope you do as well as you want, good luck!
 
 
 
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