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Not sure if I'm bisexual watch

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    I'm not sure if I'm bicurious or actually bisexual, but recently I've become more attracted to girls and less attracted to guys. When I'm drunk it really comes out - I'm seriously attracted to my lesbian friend and even more so when intoxicated as I flirt with her and touch her a lot.
    The other night I went out with one of my friends and a few of her friends, some of whom I'd just met for the first time - I really really got along with this one girl and a few hours in I had my arm round her waist and just couldn't keep my hands off her... A few times we looked at each other flirtatiously but she has a boyfriend so the following day I felt stupid and regretted the way I acted although I didn't try anything with her. She then followed me on instagram and just looking at her pictures I want to get with her so so badly. I still feel a bit silly - I don't know if she'd even remember as we were all really drunk - as it was obvious I was really in to her and this is really the first time I've liked a girl.
    I don't know if I'm just bicurious but I know that I definitely want to have sex with a girl to have the experience and to know for certain. Sometimes I do just think it's a phase but I'm not sure. For those of you that are bi how did you know for certain?
    • #1
    #1

    (Original post by peanutbuttercup)
    I'm not sure if I'm bicurious or actually bisexual, but recently I've become more attracted to girls and less attracted to guys. When I'm drunk it really comes out - I'm seriously attracted to my lesbian friend and even more so when intoxicated as I flirt with her and touch her a lot.
    The other night I went out with one of my friends and a few of her friends, some of whom I'd just met for the first time - I really really got along with this one girl and a few hours in I had my arm round her waist and just couldn't keep my hands off her... A few times we looked at each other flirtatiously but she has a boyfriend so the following day I felt stupid and regretted the way I acted although I didn't try anything with her. She then followed me on instagram and just looking at her pictures I want to get with her so so badly. I still feel a bit silly - I don't know if she'd even remember as we were all really drunk - as it was obvious I was really in to her and this is really the first time I've liked a girl.
    I don't know if I'm just bicurious but I know that I definitely want to have sex with a girl to have the experience and to know for certain. Sometimes I do just think it's a phase but I'm not sure. For those of you that are bi how did you know for certain?
    You're bicurious everyone goes through the phase. Your bisexual if you know you've always been attracted to both genders equally as much.
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    It just depends on what you want to call yourself, there's no strict definition for each orientation/sexuality. I used to think of myself as straight, but then I had my first girl crush when I was 15, and a few others since. What I've noticed is that I have much higher standards for women than for men, and find far fewer of them attractive. Therefore, I call myself heterosexual because there is only a very small chance that I'd enter a long-term relationship with a girl. I think you should just ask yourself which gender fits you better personality-wise. Ask yourself if you could have a lifelong female partner that you'd marry, or if you'd miss the 'male' vibes too much. I think that if your attraction to girls is more based on lust than willing to have a relationship, your orientation could be described as 'bi-curious' rather than bisexual.
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    Experiment. See if you like it in the sack with a girl. If you don't,then cool, don't do it again. If yo do, then cool, do it again.
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    (Original post by peanutbuttercup)
    I'm not sure if I'm bicurious or actually bisexual, but recently I've become more attracted to girls and less attracted to guys. When I'm drunk it really comes out - I'm seriously attracted to my lesbian friend and even more so when intoxicated as I flirt with her and touch her a lot.
    The other night I went out with one of my friends and a few of her friends, some of whom I'd just met for the first time - I really really got along with this one girl and a few hours in I had my arm round her waist and just couldn't keep my hands off her... A few times we looked at each other flirtatiously but she has a boyfriend so the following day I felt stupid and regretted the way I acted although I didn't try anything with her. She then followed me on instagram and just looking at her pictures I want to get with her so so badly. I still feel a bit silly - I don't know if she'd even remember as we were all really drunk - as it was obvious I was really in to her and this is really the first time I've liked a girl.
    I don't know if I'm just bicurious but I know that I definitely want to have sex with a girl to have the experience and to know for certain. Sometimes I do just think it's a phase but I'm not sure. For those of you that are bi how did you know for certain?
    Maybe you should focus on your school work and give your libido a rest. Television and other media are screwing people up these days. Natural bisexuality is extremely rare and homosexuality is about 3-4%, but if you watch enough TV, then 10-20% of the population is gay and half the rest have bisexual fantasies. It's not true. It's all about screwing people up. I don't know you personally, but I am saying that 90%-ish of women are programmed to be satisfied in a monogamous relationship with a man who cares for her. In any case, you're surely better off not getting drunk and hooking up with anyone. Sort yourself out and get serious. Life is serious.
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    I think it's hard to do when you first dealing with these things but you need to try not to stress it and give yourself space to work it out.You will work it out but you can't force it. The problem with uncertainty is usually lack of experience. I'm not saying you need to go out and have sex with a girl- though by all means do if you want. Just let yourself go with how you feel. If a possibly partner (of whatever sort or gender) asks, then be up front and say you're still not sure- otherwise you are dicking folk about, it's fair to let them know if they care. Try not to worry about getting labelled by other people, it's their issue if they think people should always be clearly labelled.


    I'm 24, I've know I was queer for 10 years. I'm still not entirely sure what my attraction to men is so I've concluded at this point the problem must be I can't generalise to all men and gender/sex are not suitable categories to define my sexuality by. That means there's kind of no certain terms I c an articulate by sexuality by that's more precise than queer. The difference between now and 10 years ago is I'm fine with it.
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    (Original post by I. Dzhugashvili)
    Maybe you should focus on your school work and give your libido a rest. Television and other media are screwing people up these days. Natural bisexuality is extremely rare and homosexuality is about 3-4%, but if you watch enough TV, then 10-20% of the population is gay and half the rest have bisexual fantasies. It's not true. It's all about screwing people up. I don't know you personally, but I am saying that 90%-ish of women are programmed to be satisfied in a monogamous relationship with a man who cares for her. In any case, you're surely better off not getting drunk and hooking up with anyone. Sort yourself out and get serious. Life is serious.
    What makes you think that discussing sexuality is not something that should be 'taken seriously?' Of course school work is important but relationships with people - particularly those we want to share part or all of our lives with is equally if not more important.

    Whilst I appreciate what you say about the media, you make no effort to back up your assertions with fact; indeed there are no 'proven' statistics to state exactly how many people are gay, so one can only speculate in reality.

    Some studies, both older and more recent - have discussed that no one is really potentially 100% either straight or gay.

    Some statistics report less than 2% of the UK population are gay, others 10%, but they are just that: numbers - irrelevant on a personal level.

    Ultimately how we feel about sexuality depends very much on how we are influenced by our own environment. Many of my friends are straight; many of my friends are straight and have had 'things' with people of the same sex, drunk and/or sober; some of my friends are bisexual, some more are gay.

    What isn't as dependent on our environment is what sexuality we actually are. I'm bisexual, and currently having to deal with a potentially ignorant father which is putting strain on our relationship.

    So please don't ever belittle anyone's dealing with sexuality, it is a very different situation for everyone so don't make an assumption as to how important it should or shouldn't be in their lives, it certainly isn't constructive to do that.

    If the OP is exploring her sexuality, then let it be so, it is important; besides, far too much is focused on doing exams and making the grades these days, and for what? :unimpressed:

    I find either seeing or being in a mutually loving relationship is both far more rewarding and inspiring, and when it eventually happens with whatever person the OP decides to be with, it will be worth it's weight in gold, because she knows it will be real and natural.

    As for the OP: if you're curious, and attracted to a girl, try it. If you enjoy it and it feels natural, it probably is. From personal experience I am more attracted to one sex than the other but both feel natural, just in different ways. Either way, if you find someone you like and they like you back, go for it, it doesn't happen often (at least for me).

    EDIT: Surely the most questionable part of your statement, unless I've misread it - is that any sexuality other than straight can be presumably, 'screwed up?!' Is that what all that learning teaches you? If so, I question your learning methods
    • #2
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    I'm bisexual, and the definition I (and many others in the bisexual community) use to identify myself is the attraction to two or more genders, not necessarily in the same way, not necessarily to the same degree, and not necessarily at the same time. If you feel you have an attraction towards women as well as men then there is no reason you can't label yourself as bisexual.

    This is from The Bisexual Index:
    If you're asking yourself "Am I Bisexual?" then here's a handy checklist:


    1. Thinking about the people you've been attracted to, so far in your life, were they all of the same gender?


    If you answered "No", to any or all of the questions in our list above then we feel it's okay for you to call yourself bisexual. We don't care how attracted you are to the genders around you - you're bisexual as soon as you stop being exclusively attracted to only one sex.
    Of course, there are loads of other orientations you might want to call yourself. All of them are absolutely okay. If you feel pressured to choose a label, don't worry about it - your sexuality is as real and valid with or without a name attached to it, and you don't have to pick until you've experimented as comfortably and thoroughly as you want. ^__^
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    In bicurious aswell, I just want to experience smething new but it's hard to find anyone who feels the same way and wants to go about it. It's starting to get stronger the feeling but I what can i do. I kissed a girl for the first time and when we are alone at her place sometimes I really want to try it because we both flirt but then she's like no we should stop. Also did with another girl and she says no we shouldn't. It makes me feel annoyed 😔 because they are new to it as well, I really want to talk about it to someone who understands me. I'm 21 and want a new experience. But people over think it too much.


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    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You're bicurious everyone goes through the phase. Your bisexual if you know you've always been attracted to both genders equally as much.
    that´s not right. bisexuality isnt about loving both genders equally, its about being able to be attracted to someone of either gender
 
 
 
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