Domestic violence against men

well - these statistics help to explain it a little....

Whatever form it takes, domestic violence is rarely a one-off incident, and should instead be seen as a pattern of abusive and controlling behaviour through which the abuser seeks power over their victim. Domestic violence occurs across society, regardless of age, gender, race, sexuality, wealth, and geography. The figures show, however, that it consists mainly of violence by men against women. Children are also affected. Not only are many traumatised by what they witness, there is also a strong connection between domestic violence and child abuse.

Domestic violence is chronically under-reported, but research shows that:

One in four women and one in six men will be a victim of domestic violence in their lifetime with women at greater risk of repeat victimisation and serious injury.
89% of those suffering four or more incidents are women

One incident of domestic violence is reported to the police every minute.

On average, two women a week are killed by a current or former male partner

Domestic violence accounts for 16 per cent of all violent crime
http://www.crimereduction.gov.uk/dv/dv01.htm

I think that men do suffer domestic abuse but that the stats above show that it is women who get killed....

Reply 3

Carl

There was a thing about this in Virginia Ironsides dilemmas in the Independent last Friday. A guy was being abused by his wife, refused to hit her back but wanted to divorce without losing the kids. The lengths he was advised to go to to get a safe divorce were shocking (staying another six months in order to keep a diary of events, getting the advice of two lawyers, refraining from hitting back, seeing a doctor to record every cut, bruise and scratch).

It's amazing that an abused woman can flee the home and be given the benefit of the doubt when it comes to divorce and the kids, but a man cannot do the same.

Reply 4

Actually the advice given to him is exactly the same advice given to women.

If women go to a refuge the man keeps the house and all the property.

She starts a new life with nothing - because if she takes legal steps to get her half of the family assets then he'll know where she is.

Reply 5

OP

*knowitall*

well - these statistics help to explain it a little....

Whatever form it takes, domestic violence is rarely a one-off incident, and should instead be seen as a pattern of abusive and controlling behaviour through which the abuser seeks power over their victim. Domestic violence occurs across society, regardless of age, gender, race, sexuality, wealth, and geography. The figures show, however, that it consists mainly of violence by men against women. Children are also affected. Not only are many traumatised by what they witness, there is also a strong connection between domestic violence and child abuse.

Domestic violence is chronically under-reported, but research shows that:

One in four women and one in six men will be a victim of domestic violence in their lifetime with women at greater risk of repeat victimisation and serious injury.
89% of those suffering four or more incidents are women

One incident of domestic violence is reported to the police every minute.

On average, two women a week are killed by a current or former male partner

Domestic violence accounts for 16 per cent of all violent crime
http://www.crimereduction.gov.uk/dv/dv01.htm

I think that men do suffer domestic abuse but that the stats above show that it is women who get killed....

Perhaps men are less likely to report violence made by a woman because of the social stigma attached?

Reply 6

I'm sure you're right - but it's women who die

Reply 7

OP

*knowitall*

I'm sure you're right - but it's women who die

That's really interesting - and sad :frown:

Why does the violence reach death for some women but not men?

Reply 8

Carl

because it's easier (whether with intent or not) for a man to beat a woman to death than a woman beat a man to death? it's a no-brainer.

Reply 9

Yes - the incidents of violence may be more numerically even than the deaths but unfortunatly usually men are heavier, stronger and more liable to kill when out of control.

If a couple lose their temper with each other and start trading blows the woman will generally come off worse.

Reply 10

OP

*knowitall*

Yes - the incidents of violence may be more numerically even than the deaths but unfortunatly usually men are heavier, stronger and more liable to kill when out of control.

If a couple lose their temper with each other and start trading blows the woman will generally come off worse.

That makes sense.

However I'm still confused as to why in general, society does not seem to care when a woman hits a man.

Reply 11

Bedshaped

Does this ever happen? And does the man weigh 5 stone and the woman weigh 20? Because that may be the problem.

Reply 12

MissHero

1

Princess_Peach

That's really interesting - and sad :frown:

Why does the violence reach death for some women but not men?

Becuase men are generally stronger and able to defend themselves better against a woman I guess. Unfortunately the fact that they can defend themselves tends to make people put the subject of abuse against men into a lesser catagory than visa versa. :confused:

Reply 13

high priestess fnord

9

the same reason that its funny in films when a small child hurts an adult man, because its ironic. it would be quite a feat for me to hurt my bf because hes a foot taller than me and alot stronger so if i punched him it wouldnt have half the impact that would occur if he punched me. i have gotten drunk and punched male friends in the past and their response has allways been to laugh or pick me up or tickle me or generally just prove that i cant do anything to them.

Reply 14

I think Princess Peach's point is that violence is violence whatever the outcome?

So girls getting drunk and hitting boys should be seen as just as serious as boys getting drunk and hitting girls?

I'm with her!

Reply 15

OP

*knowitall*

I think Princess Peach's point is that violence is violence whatever the outcome?

So girls getting drunk and hitting boys should be seen as just as serious as boys getting drunk and hitting girls?

I'm with her!

Yup that's my point.

And there's no use stating that "men can defend themselves". In what way exactily? They run the risk of having a violence allegation turned upon themselves!

Reply 16

Psyk

16

Bedshaped

Does this ever happen? And does the man weigh 5 stone and the woman weigh 20? Because that may be the problem.

I know a girl that can beat me in an arm wrestle so she could most likely take me in a fight too. She's definitely lighter than me too. I know it's usually the other way round but I think I'm a more likely target for domestic abuse than any potential partners would be. But I am pathetically weak.

Reply 17

Socrates

17

Princess_Peach

Yup that's my point.

And there's no use stating that "men can defend themselves". In what way exactily? They run the risk of having a violence allegation turned upon themselves!

I fully agree. But as Carl points out, there are social stigmas as well as a general biological observation.

Men carrying out domestic violence is more common; but that doesn't mean women carrying out against men should merely be ignored.

Reply 18

Bedshaped

omg you guys are a bunch of wusses lol!

Seriously. Unless the guy is disabled/really short/really skinny. This should never be a problem. Any guy that accuses a girl of beating him up should be hung, shot and cut up into little pieces.

Domestic violence against men does not exist!!!!!!!!!!

Reply 19