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I need help! School is making me depressed Watch

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    I don't know what to do anymore or who to talk to so I thought maybe this would help me out a bit. I hate school, there isn't any other way to describe it other than hate. Not the kind of hate every teenager says about having to do work, im 100% fine and motivated to do the work to get me somewhere in life, i hate it in a way that's really starting to affect me emotionally. I get sick in my stomach when i think about school, i get nervous and anxious and i just feel like breaking down and crying my eyes out. I don't get bullied and I'm not struggling academically, its more the social side of it i guess. I cry every single night before school, i just uncontrollably cry my eyes out dreading the next day. When friday comes its like a dream come true. I'm in year 10 so it isn't a recent thing ive been feeling this way towards school for a long time, i just feel so bad talking to my parents about it. Don't get me wrong my parents are the best parents i could ever ask and i love them to death, i just cant ever approach them about how unhappy i am at school. The times I've tried they always come to the conclusion that I'm over tired or over exaggerating. I don't know how to describe it they just don't understand. They really are true angels though, i could never worry them about my happiness because i know how much it would hurt them. I have a bit of a group at school, they just aren't friends. I don't have a bestfriend, I can't name 10 friends and that is really depressing. I find myself wondering around a lot of the time, I just can't fit in no matter how hard i try. Ive been to every group in my year and sat with them trying to make more friends and they just all seem to leave after a day. I talk to them, i laugh and am really polite i just don't belong. Theres only so many times i can invade peoples friend groups trying to fit in before it gets pointless. Im so jealous of my older sisters friends! I can't imagine how happy she is. She always has someone by her side. Someone to talk too. Someone to sit with. They seem like the bestest friends anyone could ask for and i would give up anything in my life to have that. I just feel so targeted by everyone including teachers. I wear alot of makeup, theres no other way to put it rather than the fact i hate my face, i just hate it. Im stupidly self conscious, its taking over my life. People in my grade don't like that and dont wear makeup so whenever i talk to anyone they just stare at my face while I speak and it makes me feel like crying its so hard. Also i feel targeted by every teacher that walks past me. The second they look at me i feel scared and like i have to run away. I feel so shaky and anxious. Ive had people call out relating makeup jokes to my name in class and the teacher has laughed along with them before. Im just so close to giving up, I'm not happy about anything in my life anymore but my family and this stupid boy called jack who strangely means so much to me. Sorry for babbling on so much i just dont know what to do. Im terrified to move schools and to talk to anyone about this. No one should be this unhappy at school.
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    You have one year and 5 months left of that school before you either go into 6th form or to a college. Stick it out. Because ultimately when change to a 6th form that isn't at your school or a college you are in the same position as everyone else without prior friendship groups that have been formed.

    Even if that doesn't work out you go to Uni and its the same score again but with one vital difference. Even more % of the tool bags has been filtered out.
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    (Original post by RoseannaAvery)
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    have you ever had panic attacks before? I'm not a doctor but maybe you have an anxiety disorder?
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