Attractiveness

Recently me and my friends were having a heated arguement Well it was more like a debate just one where we thoght we were each right and were expressing our feelings with passion.

Anyway it started with one person saying that he had had about 6 girls intrested in him in the past two years and he hadn't even tried to attract them thus meaning he was fairly attractive about a 8/10.

Wheres i've always had to approach girls before ever getting a date anyway then it turned into a contest of who had had the most girls interested in them. And finally concluding in the descision that the more people who have fancied you and asked you out shows how attractive you are.

Do ppl think that this is true and how many ppl have facied you in the past two years and does this increase your confidence.

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

i think most of the people at my school fancy me.

Reply 2

MissSurfer

Well firstly - some people don't always make it obvious that they fancy someone.. especially if either person is already in a relationship. Also, you could have 10 people interested in you but what if they're all ugly? People tend to be attracted to people who they consider to be a similar attractiveness to themself (ie the matching hypothesis)...

MissSurfer

Reply 3

Hell Boy

Anonymous

i think most of the people at my school fancy me.

reason to go anon?

Reply 4

*dicie*

Gman1617

And finally concluding in the descision that the more people who have fancied you and asked you out shows how attractive you are.

Do ppl think that this is true and how many ppl have facied you in the past two years and does this increase your confidence.

Erm.. considering that this seems to be based on past tense, no.
I think over the past year, one guy has fancied me, but my confidence hasn't really changed because of it.

Still don't think this affects your attractiveness though, as everyone finds different things attractive in people, like most people like pretty people. I like faces with a bit more character, a broken nose maybe?

Reply 5

scribble_girl

It's all about perception.
He PERCIEVES everyone as fancying him.
You PERCIEVE nobody as fancying you.

Proabably midway for the both of you, tbh.
I wouldn't worry =]

Reply 6

Ink

By "how attractive you are", do you mean looks-wise?

For me, and a lot of other girls, attraction is a whole package. If you just mean looks-wise, I'd have to say, no, how many people fancy you does not automatically indicate that you are hot or not.

You also need to define "interest". What does he mean by "girls have been interested in him"? Have they personally come up to him to confess their feelings? Or has it just been what he thought because they flirted with him?

A lot of girls are old-fashioned and think the guy should approach them, or are shy and prefer for the guy to approach them because they are afraid of rejection. You having to approach girls doesn't mean they didn't like you to begin with.

...I'm just wondering whether you were on the same page with this.

At the end of the day, the truth is, the 'hotter' people are going to have an easier time of getting dates...so maybe your friend is indeed 'more attractive' than you. Doesn't matter much though. Like I said, attraction is a whole package. There are redeeming qualities in even the ugliest people....and looks can only take a person so far. They don't make a meaningful relationship last.

As for myself...I'm a girl, and I think it's easier for us because men are more likely to approach us, but I've had...oh...11 people?...pursue me in the last two years....in terms of people I knew and saw every day.

In truth, it doesn't really help my confidence becuase I have huge guilt problems and I end up just feeling really guilty for not liking them back.

It's nice, though, if they are people I like back. That helps my confidence, but only until things go sour.

Reply 7

egg_soup

every single lad i have known in the last 2 years has fancied me. and i know this because they all told me. about 25. does that make me gorgeous?

OH HELL YEAH.

Reply 8

Onearmedbandit

I fancy wigan athletic FTW.

Reply 9

wiwarin_mir

I should just point out that attractiveness is not the most important part of a relationship and if two people get together for the sole reason of mutual attraction, chances are the relationship will end up failing. So what if he feels that there are loads of girls that fancy him, it just makes him more arrogant and cocky as he thinks that when he is in a relationship, if things arn't going his way he could just get another girl quite quickly.
He will in effect take a relationship far less seriously and therefore be less likely to have lasting relationships (take a look at the popular people at school and how some of them seem to go through a huge number of boyfriends/girlfriends). If you want a relationship because you want it to last, don't be dragged down by merely attraction, there are loads of other things to consider, like personality, interests ect.

If he thinks that he is great for being able to attract loads of girls, let him, but remember that if you find just one girl that you really click with, you have it much better than him.

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