The Student Room Group

Girls who don't offer to pay on first date shouldn't get a second date

Was reading this article about a disgusting study:

Of 17,000 women questioned, 44 percent said they don’t expect to help with the check at all. In fact, they admitted they’d be annoyed if their date expected them to pitch in on dates. And 39 percent of women said that even when they offer to pay, they’re just being polite and hope their date will insist on picking up the check.


And this in a world where young women make more money than men of the same age (both UK and US). You always hear women how they don't like cheap men. How the hell does that not apply to women too? Why should men put up with cheap women? Oh and don't get me started on Valentine's day:

In general, men planned to spend about $124 on a spouse or significant other, while women planned to spend only $54.


How about women stop being cheap and show some generosity like men have been doing for ... I don't know, ever? Entitlement much? I love when women say ''I'm old fashioned that way'' meaning ''I want to pick and choose which parts of equality I like and which I don't''. Never heard one say she's old fashioned about equal pay or the right to vote...

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Reply 1
Original post by SerenityNow
Was reading this article about a disgusting study:



And this in a world where young women make more money than men of the same age (both UK and US). You always hear women how they don't like cheap men. How the hell does that not apply to women too? Why should men put up with cheap women? Oh and don't get me started on Valentine's day:



How about women stop being cheap and show some generosity like men have been doing for ... I don't know, ever? Entitlement much? I love when women say ''I'm old fashioned that way'' meaning ''I want to pick and choose which parts of equality I like and which I don't''. Never heard one say she's old fashioned about equal pay or the right to vote...

when will women stop being cheap, for gods sake, this is when women are now getting more degrees than men and **** like this is still happening, sickening!
ye I don't like freeloaders. I put them in my acquaintance list.
Reply 3
Utterly disgusting


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Depends. A girl whose outlook is entirely old-fashioned, i.e. "I want a man who will support me and I want to look after the house and kids" I can understand.

Girls who are 'old-fashioned' only when it suits them I don't understand. If you expect guys to pay for dinners out but you can't cook yourself, there is something wrong there.
Reply 5
I used to know a guy who never paid for his date's meal etc. and one time a girl didn't even bring any money, assuming he'd pay. He paid for his meal and just left, never saw her again so he didn't know if or how she paid. The last thing he remembered was she looked like she was about to cry lol. Sounds a bit much but how else are they ever gonna learn? Too many girls grow up with this entitled princess mentality then when real life hits them in the face they think everything is against them and the ''woe is me'' stage begins.
Reply 6
Girls that do that just give feminism a bad name. I'm reluctant to use the word feminist to describe myself just because of the negative connotations it has, but I suppose in reality I am. I advocate equality between the sexes in every sense so yes, I'd go halves with my date. But if he was adamant to pay in full then I'd pick up the tab next time.
Reply 7
I don't think it's bad for the man to pay, and I don't think it undermines "equal rights" - however, I think if the woman has more money then it's immoral for her to not even offer.
I generally insist on paying for myself, but my current partner says he likes to pay for me, so we tend to compromise. Like, he buys dinner and I buy the drinks :smile:
In my view it should be a nice treat if the man pays, not something that just happens
Reply 8
Original post by niccosia
Girls that do that just give feminism a bad name. I'm reluctant to use the word feminist to describe myself just because of the negative connotations it has, but I suppose in reality I am. I advocate equality between the sexes in every sense so yes, I'd go halves with my date. But if he was adamant to pay in full then I'd pick up the tab next time.


The vast majority of women still leave most or all the approaching, courting, planning, entertaining, being funny and charming, calling or texting back to men. On top of men spending more money on women than vice-versa. This is not a small minority, almost all women still do this to some extent in 2015. Their idea of dating is basically showing up.
Definitely think both genders should make an equal contribution.
Original post by ubi1
when will women stop being cheap, for gods sake, this is when women are now getting more degrees than men and shiit like this is still happening, sickening!


You do realise the only reason more women are getting degrees than men is BECAUSE of the equality right? We need the degree in order to have an equal footing with men
Reply 11
Although I believe in equal rights, I don't believe gender roles are the spawn of Satan either. I'm pretty okay with the idea of being the breadwinner, paying for dates, and so on - I like being generous and it's just a masculine thing to do. But I do it because I want to, not because that's her expectation, and if she wanted to pay I wouldn't mind letting her.

If the lady expected me to pay then I wouldn't care much for that. I don't see her expectation as a legitimate aspect of femininity - it just communicates to me that she's high maintenance and probably not relationship material.
Reply 12
Original post by hollymae7
You do realise the only reason more women are getting degrees than men is BECAUSE of the equality right? We need the degree in order to have an equal footing with men

I agree women need degree more than men, however staying relevant to the OP, here it's about women and their generosity, if they don't offer up one first date, it sends bad signals, entitled to stuff.
Chilvarly is dead.

It's disgusting that men are counting women as 'cheap' if they expect the men to pay for dates.

Yes, you've asked a woman for the pleasure of her time in form of a date. If you genuinely see her as someone you'll like to spend time with you shouldn't even be thinking about petty things such as money or who pays what.
Original post by miser
Although I believe in equal rights, I don't believe gender roles are the spawn of Satan either. I'm pretty okay with the idea of being the breadwinner, paying for dates, and so on - I like being generous and it's just a masculine thing to do. But I do it because I want to, not because that's her expectation, and if she wanted to pay I wouldn't mind letting her.

If the lady expected me to pay then I wouldn't care much for that. I don't see her expectation as a legitimate aspect of femininity - it just communicates to me that she's high maintenance and probably not relationship material.


Exactly. If you're with a down to earth woman who you genuinely love what is the big deal in being the breadwinner.
Original post by hollymae7
You do realise the only reason more women are getting degrees than men is BECAUSE of the equality right? We need the degree in order to have an equal footing with men


Yes, a woman HAS to be educated. She has no other choice.
Reply 16
Original post by PrincessAlexis
Chilvarly is dead.

It's disgusting that men are counting women as 'cheap' if they expect the men to pay for dates.

Yes, you've asked a woman for the pleasure of her time in form of a date. If you genuinely see her as someone you'll like to spend time with you shouldn't even be thinking about petty things such as money or who pays what.

It's pleasant and delightful for both parties to split it equally.
Original post by ubi1
I agree women need degree more than men, however staying relevant to the OP, here it's about women and their generosity, if they don't offer up one first date, it sends bad signals, entitled to stuff.


Well as someone who has always paid for my half of the date, if not all of it, I would suggest that you are perhaps finding the wrong girls to take out. The ones willing to pay their share are probably not the ones who'll appreciate your meninist bs.
Original post by PrincessAlexis
Chilvarly is dead.

It's disgusting that men are counting women as 'cheap' if they expect the men to pay for dates.

Yes, you've asked a woman for the pleasure of her time in form of a date. If you genuinely see her as someone you'll like to spend time with you shouldn't even be thinking about petty things such as money or who pays what.


Why are you assuming the man asked the woman for the date?
Reply 19
Original post by hollymae7
Well as someone who has always paid for my half of the date, if not all of it, I would suggest that you are perhaps finding the wrong girls to take out. The ones willing to pay their share are probably not the ones who'll appreciate your meninist bs.

I do believe there are exceptions, like you have stated that you pay, but OP has listed the study, and it's quite the norm for the man to be the generous one when it comes to 1st date.

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