The Student Room Group

Is 11 hours at nursery a day too much for a toddler?

I want to put my son into nursery from 7:30am-6:00pm as that's when his dad can get him and take him there.

I start and finish uni at 9:00am and finish at 4:00pm but I don't drive, the nursery isn't on a bus route from my house and is a 20 minute walk uphill. I then have to walk to the train station for uni from the nursery which is around 15 mins for uni.

I've been finding this a bit hard and I thought the the logical thing was for my sons dad to collect and drop him off but he cannot possibly have him at nursery later than 7:30am or picked up before 6pm.

my mum (who hates nurseries) says this is far too long a day. Do you think she's right? I don't need all those hours away from him as I'm not at uni until 9:00am and it's not too far from the the uni to my house (20 mins train journey). It's just that the walks to and from uni are quite a walk. The journey is also along a canal some of the way so all bumpy and rubbish with a pram.

any advice as I'm not sure what to do. I originally wAnted a childminder but there are no good ones with spaces
available.
(edited 9 years ago)

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Reply 1
He turned 17 months yesterday
That's what we do with our DS (this is mumsnet right?). So long as its a good nursery. How often does he go?
Reply 3
He goes 2 days a week and for 7 months will go full time until I've finished the practice element for my course. Then after that 15 hours a week.

My mum worked in a bad nursery so hates them and refuses to believe there are good ones.

She's told i'm putting my own needs above my sons and it's cruel to have him in that long. It's cruel to put him in nursery and should only be done when absolutely necessary.

Of course I know that's nonsense and I've ignored her but I have listened to the fact she thinks it's too long a day and think maybe it is true. But don't want to make a load of work for myself by bringing him to nursery myself when there's nothing wrong with the extended day
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 4
Yes 11 hours is definitely too long. He is probably only awake for 12-15 hours of the day, and 11 of those would be spent away from you.
Yeah we do the same 2x 7:30-6 a week. He loves it, the nursery is very good, dedicated potty trainer etc. Don't let anyone make you feel that you are a bad parent for doing this...mums can be especially judgmental. Make sure you have quality family dinner after nursery and encourage him to talk about his day as he learns to talk.
He will probably still nap at nursery so the day isn't really much longer for him.
Full time bit will be a stretch but sounds like its necessary. How Can you afford this much child care?
Reply 8
I get all my childcare paid by a bursary so I don't pay a penny :-)
Reply 9
Original post by earthworm
Full time bit will be a stretch but sounds like its necessary. How Can you afford this much child care?


I've replies. Meant to include this quote in my reply. I thought all
Students for their childcare paid
For. I must be wrong
Reply 10
I've decided to try and carry on picking him up and see how it goes once I get a placement. All will then depend on where the placement is
Not a student again yet, going back to do PGCE in sep. That's why I'm on TSR. What are you studying?
Reply 12
Original post by earthworm
Not a student again yet, going back to do PGCE in sep. That's why I'm on TSR. What are you studying?


Social work. There's funding for PGCE students too. :-)
Original post by Mezza362
Social work. There's funding for PGCE students too. :-)


Where from? I get a big training bursary so might not be eligible.
Reply 14
Original post by earthworm
Where from? I get a big training bursary so might not be eligible.


http://www.kingston.ac.uk/postgraduate/fees-and-funding/funding-your-course/pgce-students/students-with-dependents/#childcare

This explains quite well.
You should still be entitled to the grant but I'd you have a partner who works may not be.
11 hours for a 17 month old is too long, imo. :frown:
I may be shot down in flames, but the most important years of a child's life should be spent with his mother, nurturing him full time.

Rather than force him through his most formative years of life being without his mother, have you not thought an OU course would be more appropriate in your circumstances? Or even waiting until he is school age before thinking of yourself?

After all, it was your choice to have him and your choice to want full time university.

Where is his choice?

Being an adult with the responsibility of caring for a very young child, means making sacrifices.

For what it's worth, I think your priorities should be for him and any compromises you make should be your own, not his.
How many days a week are you putting your toddler in nursery? If this is only for a couple of days a week then I'd say it's ok, if it's for all five weekdays then it's probably a bit much. Nursery can play an important part in a child's development, especially from a social aspect and they get the ball rolling with education as well. It helps prepare them for school as well.
Original post by uberteknik
I may be shot down in flames, but the most important years of a child's life should be spent with his mother, nurturing him full time.

Rather than force him through his most formative years of life being without his mother, have you not thought an OU course would be more appropriate in your circumstances? Or even waiting until he is school age before thinking of yourself?

After all, it was your choice to have him and your choice to want full time university.

Where is his choice?

Being an adult with the responsibility of caring for a very young child, means making sacrifices.

For what it's worth, I think your priorities should be for him and any compromises you make should be your own, not his.


Its the social work practice that is the problem- not sure you can you get an accredited social work degree without practice?

I was raised by 2 full time jr doctors (before the working time directive) and I have a great relationship with them.

If it is going to be a problem couldn't dad work part time? I worked 37 hrs in 4 days to get an extra day with DS, the company will have to consider his request by law. You might also be able to ask the uni if you can spread hours outside of term time. Unis can be flexible with this too.

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