The Student Room Group

Feelings for flatmate and a strange situation?

First of all, I have feelings for someone I live with who's in a relationship... We get on well and are good friends, however recently I've noticed that their behaviour is a little more than just platonic.

The situation: we stayed in one night together and watched movies, however during the films she'd play footsie and rub her legs against mine. At one point she ended up sitting on me, while we were messing around.

The issue: I am confused by her change in behaviour and that seems more comfortable with physical contact , but I do not want to provoke anything as she's in a relationship and I don't want to ruin our friendship.

Am I just interpreting it all incorrectly? I have no idea what to do (if anything at all)

Please help!
Reply 1
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Reply 2
I think you should stay away from her. I don't mean anything horrible like not talking anymore etc, but just try to keep the distance. If you see that she's comfortable with physical contact with you, don't be a d*ck and don't use the situation.

Imagine yourself in her boyfriend's position. I'm sure you wouldn't be happy if some bastard was trying to steal your girlfriend.

Their relationship is their business, they're probably just having some temporary difficulties, etc. Every relationship has that.
Reply 3
Original post by daryZ
I think you should stay away from her. I don't mean anything horrible like not talking anymore etc, but just try to keep the distance. If you see that she's comfortable with physical contact with you, don't be a d*ck and don't use the situation.

Imagine yourself in her boyfriend's position. I'm sure you wouldn't be happy if some bastard was trying to steal your girlfriend.

Their relationship is their business, they're probably just having some temporary difficulties, etc. Every relationship has that.


Thats completely the right thing to do and is what I was ore than likely going to do. I just really wanted some clarity on what she is thinking and I would only move things forward if she was single. I just need to find someone else.
Original post by Anonymous
Thats completely the right thing to do and is what I was ore than likely going to do. I just really wanted some clarity on what she is thinking and I would only move things forward if she was single. I just need to find someone else.


She seems like a ****. Stay away from her.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
She seems like a ****. Stay away from her.


I don't think she is tbh. I've never seen her like this with anyone. Maybe she is just very flirty? I really do not want to ruin my friendship with but I would 100% date her if I had the chance to
Reply 6
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Reply 7
BUMP!!
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
First of all, I have feelings for someone I live with who's in a relationship... We get on well and are good friends, however recently I've noticed that their behaviour is a little more than just platonic.

The situation: we stayed in one night together and watched movies, however during the films she'd play footsie and rub her legs against mine. At one point she ended up sitting on me, while we were messing around.

The issue: I am confused by her change in behaviour and that seems more comfortable with physical contact , but I do not want to provoke anything as she's in a relationship and I don't want to ruin our friendship.

Am I just interpreting it all incorrectly? I have no idea what to do (if anything at all)

Please help!


I have been there before - girls do this flirty chit all the time to their guy friends. They do it for attention/they want to feel desired (even by men they're not in a relationship with). It does not necessarily mean she fancies you. Unless she makes a more direct sign, I would not act on the assumptions she's interested.
(edited 9 years ago)
Keep the distance bro, but don't be too awkward about it.

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