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My boyfriend is obssesed with another woman

So we have been talking for 5 months now and have been official for a month and his obsession over this other woman is still going on...

We "met" via twitter and his header was this woman with a big ass and big boobs (https://twitter.com/inihelene) and he would always tweet her pics or RT them and I didn't think much of it. Then just before new years he said sorry I got lost on twitter (he said sorry for replying late) and I was like haha yeah in Ines' ass (he tweeted a pic of her) and he's like yeah haha that always happens.... then he's like I think I have a problem I was like oh no what is it and he sends me 15 pictures of her.... and then listed everything perfect about her to me and obviously I went stone cold I did not like what had just happened he even said how she follows him I was like "Dm her then" AND HE SAID I MIGHT????????????? and HE KNOWS I am very insecure about my body (my body is perfectly fine but I do wish I had bigger boobs and stuff anywaysssss) but he knows I am an insecure person in general anyway we fell out over that and patched up but he didn't really acknowledge that he did anything wrong.

We finally met on the night before valentines and went out and had some fun in London and then spent the night cuddling and kissing it was all special and emotional. (btw when we met I had my friend with me he had his and they were together in another bed lmao bc in a flat) anyway yeah then I talked to him about what we are we became official and then he started to you know, be "controlling", making me block a guy friend for calling me etc things like that. I told him can you please not comment on other girls pictures out of respect for me, and then the same night I snapchatted videos of this famous beauty guru and her tag with her boyfriend when they were talking about liking commenting fav'ing RTing other girls pictures... he GOT THE MESSAGE LOUD AND CLEAR because he mentioned it to me the next day when we were talking about snapchat, I wanted to see his views so I said how I like to post stuff like that to see what others say about it but nobody snapped me their opinion and he's like "haha maybe they agree??" sooooooooo he deffo got the message

Then I check his twitter yesterday and find that he fav'd that Ines Helene girls picture. I CRACKED, I was so cold with him he could tell something was wrong, he was tryna get it out of me all day but tbh that day I wasn't in the mood for drama that it might cause, at the end I was like haha nothing b it's nothing dw and then later on he told me how he's been having a rough day (basically his problems) and we moved on from the topic...

tbh I have a lot of anger about this, if it was Kim K or Beyonce I wouldn't care but he can't give me rules and I stick to them but then not abstain from going out his way to fav her pic? This woman doesn't even resemble me so how insulting that his ideal woman who is his header on twitter etc is nothing like me, so I am therefore NOT his ideal, just something to settle with, it's baffling like why is he even with me then? Why would he make her an exception to the one thing I asked him to do which was not fav or comment on other girls pics? Shes not even a celeb crush she follows him fgs am I justified in reacting like this? I am sooooo so so angry. I shouldn't be in this position. Whats your views?

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Reply 1
How should I go about mentioning this, I don't want to be taken as a mug who just lets things slide, the longer I leave this the longer he goes thinking it's okay, I am worried he will just "side" with her (if that makes any sense) and things ending badly.
Reply 2
TL;DR required..
My ex did a similar thing with that bitch Jessica Nigri which I don't even understand because all she has is huge tits and her face isn't even that nice, she wears a **** ton of make up. It disgusted me to be honest with you. He even wanted to fly to america to just see her at comic con. There's a reason he's my ex now and not boyfriend. If I were you I would break it off with him OP. You deserve all his attention, he should be making you feel good about yourself, not make you feel more insecure than you already are.
(edited 8 years ago)
I totally understand why you feel like this, it's disrespectful to look at another woman/man in a sexual way when you're in a relationship. Of course there are going to be other people that you both find attractive, however you control those feelings because it's respectful and fair on your partner. What's even more annoying is that this woman isn't even a celebrity, just a normal girl who's not afraid to flaunt what she's got.

Your boyfriend really needs to buck up his ideas if he plans on keeping you. I think it's rather pathetic that he can't stop himself from favouriting and tweeting this girls photos.
Just seen her twitter and I don't blame your boyfriend at all, she's bloody fit i'd give her one.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
My ex did a similar thing with that bitch Jessica Nigri which I don't even understand because all she has is huge tits and her face isn't even that nice, she wears a f*ck ton of make up. It disgusted me to be honest with you. He even wanted to fly to america to just see her at comic con. There's a reason he's my ex now and not boyfriend. If I were you I would break it off with him OP. You deserve all his attention, he should be making you feel good about yourself, not make you feel more insecure than you already are.


THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL!! This woman is alllll fake, her nose, cheeks, ass, boobs, and she's just a normal girl not some celeb, and alllwaayyyssss caked in makeup!! disgusts me that this is his idea of beauty!!

but girl he does try his best to make me feel good about myself I just dunno what went up with him that day, it's like he was tryna get me jealous or confirm I like him for some ego boost and it didn't go how he expected it to :mad: this was loooong before we even met nevermind became a couple but he was doing so well until this ffs
Reply 7
Original post by jordanhenderson.
I totally understand why you feel like this, it's disrespectful to look at another woman/man in a sexual way when you're in a relationship. Of course there are going to be other people that you both find attractive, however you control those feelings because it's respectful and fair on your partner. What's even more annoying is that this woman isn't even a celebrity, just a normal girl who's not afraid to flaunt what she's got.

Your boyfriend really needs to buck up his ideas if he plans on keeping you. I think it's rather pathetic that he can't stop himself from favouriting and tweeting this girls photos.


Yeah there's always gonna be someone better looking than me and the same goes for him, but I am not salivating over these other guys or obsessing over them! UGH! And yeah exactly AND she follows him... so really she is a lot more accessible than a celebrity therefore not a celeb crush he's frickin infatuated! All his favs are her pics, a lot of his tweets are her pics, now we have met and became official I would've liked to have seen him out a stop to this especially after I made it clear not to go liking other girtls pics
Original post by jordanhenderson.
I totally understand why you feel like this, it's disrespectful to look at another woman/man in a sexual way when you're in a relationship. Of course there are going to be other people that you both find attractive, however you control those feelings because it's respectful and fair on your partner. What's even more annoying is that this woman isn't even a celebrity, just a normal girl who's not afraid to flaunt what she's got.

Your boyfriend really needs to buck up his ideas if he plans on keeping you. I think it's rather pathetic that he can't stop himself from favouriting and tweeting this girls photos.


Agree with everything apart from the 'looking at other women in a sexual way' part. It's one thing to be respectful while you're in a relationship, but you can't just stop noticing things. Also, guys watch porn, relationship or not.

Back on topic, this is pretty different - she's not some anonymous person. He's singled her out in particular, and she's following him back on Twitter. I think that goes beyond the normal exceptions to the rule. I'd be pissed if I were you, OP.
Does this sound like your boyfriend, OP?

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Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah there's always gonna be someone better looking than me and the same goes for him, but I am not salivating over these other guys or obsessing over them! UGH! And yeah exactly AND she follows him... so really she is a lot more accessible than a celebrity therefore not a celeb crush he's frickin infatuated! All his favs are her pics, a lot of his tweets are her pics, now we have met and became official I would've liked to have seen him out a stop to this especially after I made it clear not to go liking other girtls pics

I couldn't be with someone who was clearly constantly fantasising about being in a relationship with someone else. He doesn't sound particularly committed to a relationship with you. Sounds like he's playing at having a relationship but doesn't actually know what it entails. I'd dump but that's just me.
Original post by TurboCretin
Agree with everything apart from the 'looking at other women in a sexual way' part. It's one thing to be respectful while you're in a relationship, but you can't just stop noticing things. Also, guys watch porn, relationship or not.

Back on topic, this is pretty different - she's not some anonymous person. He's singled her out in particular, and she's following him back on Twitter. I think that goes beyond the normal exceptions to the rule. I'd be pissed if I were you, OP.


Yeah I agree 1000000%!!! It's really bothering me and tbh I feel like a fool. inadequate. second best, easily pleased, too soft etc etc

I have typed up a whole frickin essay about how i feel about this to him and Idk whether to send it or not, it's gonna be a huge shock looool and idc if he's stressed with his dad and uni work etc ffs man
Original post by Ronove
I couldn't be with someone who was clearly constantly fantasising about being in a relationship with someone else. He doesn't sound particularly committed to a relationship with you. Sounds like he's playing at having a relationship but doesn't actually know what it entails. I'd dump but that's just me.


He has no problem staying committed, we do like eachother a lot but this crush he has bugs me a lotttt
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah I agree 1000000%!!! It's really bothering me and tbh I feel like a fool. inadequate. second best, easily pleased, too soft etc etc

I have typed up a whole frickin essay about how i feel about this to him and Idk whether to send it or not, it's gonna be a huge shock looool and idc if he's stressed with his dad and uni work etc ffs man


All he has to do is not obsess over this girl anymore. The fact he has other stuff going on doesn't make the task any harder.

He must be a complete dullard to have made it so obvious to you in the first place.
Original post by Anonymous
So we have been talking for 5 months now and have been official for a month and his obsession over this other woman is still going on...

We "met" via twitter and his header was this woman with a big ass and big boobs (https://twitter.com/inihelene) and he would always tweet her pics or RT them and I didn't think much of it. Then just before new years he said sorry I got lost on twitter (he said sorry for replying late) and I was like haha yeah in Ines' ass (he tweeted a pic of her) and he's like yeah haha that always happens.... then he's like I think I have a problem I was like oh no what is it and he sends me 15 pictures of her.... and then listed everything perfect about her to me and obviously I went stone cold I did not like what had just happened he even said how she follows him I was like "Dm her then" AND HE SAID I MIGHT????????????? and HE KNOWS I am very insecure about my body (my body is perfectly fine but I do wish I had bigger boobs and stuff anywaysssss) but he knows I am an insecure person in general anyway we fell out over that and patched up but he didn't really acknowledge that he did anything wrong.

We finally met on the night before valentines and went out and had some fun in London and then spent the night cuddling and kissing it was all special and emotional. (btw when we met I had my friend with me he had his and they were together in another bed lmao bc in a flat) anyway yeah then I talked to him about what we are we became official and then he started to you know, be "controlling", making me block a guy friend for calling me etc things like that. I told him can you please not comment on other girls pictures out of respect for me, and then the same night I snapchatted videos of this famous beauty guru and her tag with her boyfriend when they were talking about liking commenting fav'ing RTing other girls pictures... he GOT THE MESSAGE LOUD AND CLEAR because he mentioned it to me the next day when we were talking about snapchat, I wanted to see his views so I said how I like to post stuff like that to see what others say about it but nobody snapped me their opinion and he's like "haha maybe they agree??" sooooooooo he deffo got the message

Then I check his twitter yesterday and find that he fav'd that Ines Helene girls picture. I CRACKED, I was so cold with him he could tell something was wrong, he was tryna get it out of me all day but tbh that day I wasn't in the mood for drama that it might cause, at the end I was like haha nothing b it's nothing dw and then later on he told me how he's been having a rough day (basically his problems) and we moved on from the topic...

tbh I have a lot of anger about this, if it was Kim K or Beyonce I wouldn't care but he can't give me rules and I stick to them but then not abstain from going out his way to fav her pic? This woman doesn't even resemble me so how insulting that his ideal woman who is his header on twitter etc is nothing like me, so I am therefore NOT his ideal, just something to settle with, it's baffling like why is he even with me then? Why would he make her an exception to the one thing I asked him to do which was not fav or comment on other girls pics? Shes not even a celeb crush she follows him fgs am I justified in reacting like this? I am sooooo so so angry. I shouldn't be in this position. Whats your views?
:rolleyes:


foreals though. He'd leave you if that girl ever showed interest in him lol
(edited 8 years ago)
Reply 15
Original post by Anonymous
He has no problem staying committed, we do like eachother a lot but this crush he has bugs me a lotttt

He actively and publicly feeds a crush on someone, with two-way contact (to an extent - the reciprocal following, at least), right under your nose, through the same medium he met and got into a relationship with you, no? That's not committed in my book. If she showed any interest at all, would he dump you for her?
Original post by TurboCretin


He must be a complete dullard to have made it so obvious to you in the first place.


Or just honest?
Original post by Ronove
He actively and publicly feeds a crush on someone, with two-way contact (to an extent - the reciprocal following, at least), right under your nose, through the same medium he met and got into a relationship with you, no? That's not committed in my book. If she showed any interest at all, would he dump you for her?


Honestly I dont know, I have thought about that, but me ansd him are both in early stages, we JUST got into a relationship
holy crap just saw her twitter. That ass. Can't be real life lol.

(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by ChickenMadness
holy crap just saw her twitter. That ass. Can't be real life lol.


lmaoooooo it's deffo out of this world, and out of my bank budget

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