Suffering from serious bipolar disorder......help me!

My grandfather struggled with BiPolar most of his life. The best way to deal with it is to go to a doctor and get yourself officially diagnosed, once you do this they will be able to medicate you to regulate your swings. As long as you stay on the medication you will find life is much easier to navigate and you will stop having those terrible downward spirals.

Is there any other ways that I can cure all by myself? I mean without any assistance of a doctor.

Not being funny or nothing but bipolar disorder, at least in its classic form, (manic depression) is an extremely severe and profoundly incapacitating form of mental illness. You don't self-diagnosis such a massive psychiatric disease on Google even if you had a mild form, and certainly if your bipolar was serious you'd have most likely been sectioned at least once.

I never spoke of the things I did to myself. My parents already thinks I
need some medication along with meditation, because they have seen me
many times getting killed by myself, you can say more like suicidal
attempts but it's not that I like doing these things, out of nowhere I
feel bad and I can't control of what I do. But at the same time I'm
aware of my actions and I don't understand why I do the things that my mind wants to ignore. I'm not kinda person who would quit so easily on anything but surprisingly I will do something you wouldn't expect nor i can control my anger or my ego. I look normal, but my cuts on my body which i did to myself was not intentionally. Five years ago, I got too much fascinated watching myself bleed with a blade etc. and that turned into a habbit, this lasted like 3 to 4 years and now I don't feel like doing self harm anymore, maybe I'm tired of going to hospitals. Even to reduce this pressure out of my mind I started taking drugs or weeds and my health started becoming worse and then I stopped all at my own will. Now I don't have any urge of doing me a self harm but as i said out of nowhere I become numb and too much deppressed. I want to have a partner or someone to share all thoughts and get secured by emotionally but it seemed I can't connect myself to anyone or I feel every one is judgemental and no one seems to understand me. If you say so I will try seeing a doctor, but i don't think it will be of any use.

I'm sorry to hear you have to go through with all that but the fact remains that true bipolar disorder is a severe mental illness that involves alternating periods of both depression and mania, not just the former. I genuinely do sympathise and I definitely think you should get medical care, but I'd be careful about self-diagnoses on Google. The best thing to do would be to get your GP to refer you to a psychiatrist, and see what s/he has to say. None of us are qualified to give you an accurate answer and given we don't know about your past or former (hypo)manic history I don't really think anyone's in any position to adequately inform you.

Good luck with recovery and I genuinely hope you do get better.