Worried I could be pregnant, just need some advice :( Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
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First of all please don't judge me, I know I have been incredibly foolish and ****ed up but I don't need any one else telling me that as I've taken it out on myself enough. I'm just so ashamed and disappointed with myself and don't know what i was thinking.

Last week I met up with a guy for drinks on the monday and things seemed to be going really well. Ended up seeing him every day last week. On wednesday we went out for dinner and I ended up going back to his for a bit. well one thing led to another and we ended up having unprotected sex (he didn't finish inside me as we stopped before that could happen). The next day I woke up ****ting myself so after being on the phone for an hour with my friend crying I booked an emergency appointment at the doctors and got the morning after pill.

I ended up seeing him again later and well the same thing happened again and we ended up having unprotected sex (again he didn't finish inside me as we stopped before it could get to that stage).

I'm honestly so disappointed with myself

I stopped taking the pill (Rivegidon) a couple of months ago as I was a hormonal mess and broke up with my ex at the time so didn't really see the need in finding a new one. When i went to the doctors to get the morning after pill I was given a different pill to cry (cilest). I've read the pamphlet and it says I can take it up to 5 days before the start of my period but tbh I don't know when that will next be as my periods are so irregular and I was told by the doctor that the morning after pill can cause your next period to come early or later than usual. My friend told me to start taking cilest asap after I told her what happened but I haven't because I have no idea when my next period is.

What makes it even harder is that i'm now out of the country until the 16th of April so I can't take a test right now or go to the clinic to be tested for infections. I come home for a day on the 7th so I was planning on using that time to take a test and hopefully go to the clinic as it would have been 2 weeks then. I'm just worried that if I don't have time to do it then is leaving it until i'm back for good on the 16th too late to do anything?!

I'm honestly so scared and ashamed with myself and I haven't really got anyone I can talk too about this. I can't tell my parents (strict Catholics) and I'm not particularly close to them so a conversation like this would be difficult. This isn't the right time in life for me to have a child as much as i love them, I haven't got a well paid job, i go to uni in september and Im not experienced enough with life. I don't know what to say to the guy, he likes me and wants to continue seeing me when i'm home but do i wait and see if my period comes or should I tell him now that i'm worried?

I'm absolutely terrified and really don't know what to do
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scrunkie
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What exactly are you worried about? He didn't "finish" inside you so the likelihood you're pregnant is significantly lowered due to that. Also, you took the morning after pill... so what's the issue?

Why not just do a test and then worry about it if it's positive instead of stressing when you have no idea what could happen? I'm sure there are pregnancy tests in the country you're in...
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futbol
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If you have a shred of respect for the Catholic Church then keep the thing and raise it Catho...
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GeorgeTownsend
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I think the best course of action for the moment is to remain calm. There's no evidence you're pregnant and he didn't ejaculate inside you so that lowers the probability even more. Also, there are pregnancy tests in practically every country in the world now, just buy one from a pharmacy and use it
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Anonymous #1
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I'm in quite a rural area where I am right now, the only shops near me are small grocery/farm type shops which is of no help whatsoever.

I know but I'm still a worrier, all Iv'e done since iv'e been back out here is cry and worry

Personally I don't believe in religion and I am in no position right now to look after a child properly
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GeorgeTownsend
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in quite a rural area where I am right now, the only shops near me are small grocery/farm type shops which is of no help whatsoever.

I know but I'm still a worrier, all Iv'e done since iv'e been back out here is cry and worry

Personally I don't believe in religion and I am in no position right now to look after a child properly
Couldn't you order some online or travel into the nearest town/city to buy one?
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Malevolent
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In all likelihood you are fine, he didn't finish inside you so don't assume the worst.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GeorgeTownsend)
Couldn't you order some online or travel into the nearest town/city to buy one?
I'm trying to see about buses etc. The nearest train station is a couple of towns along and at the moment I have no way of getting there. I really am in the middle of no where
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georgiaswift
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(Original post by scrunkie)
What exactly are you worried about? He didn't "finish" inside you so the likelihood you're pregnant is significantly lowered due to that.
(Original post by GeorgeTownsend)
he didn't ejaculate inside you so that lowers the probability even more.
(Original post by Malevolent)
In all likelihood you are fine, he didn't finish inside you so don't assume the worst.
Just so you guys know, you don't have to finish inside a girl to get her pregnant. The stuff that comes out before is just as effective at doing the job...
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Duncan2012
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Do you have access to a doctor/clinic/someone to talk to in whichever country you are in? It sounds like you need to talk to a professional. It's not clear if you've taken the morning after pill at all. Could it be worth coming back early? You need to stop being an idiot and having unprotected sex. A one-off 'mistake' could be understandable, but you've done it twice now. Apart from that it sounds like you have a rational understanding of the situation, and you'll find plenty of support when you ask for it. The worst thing you can do is do nothing. Good luck.
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scrunkie
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(Original post by georgiaswift)
Just so you guys know, you don't have to finish inside a girl to get her pregnant. The stuff that comes out before is just as effective at doing the job...
I didn't say it wasn't possible, I said the likelihood is significantly reduced.
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CherryWine
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in quite a rural area where I am right now, the only shops near me are small grocery/farm type shops which is of no help whatsoever.

I know but I'm still a worrier, all Iv'e done since iv'e been back out here is cry and worry

Personally I don't believe in religion and I am in no position right now to look after a child properly

Calm down and stop crying, you've taken the morning after pill and the fact that he didn't finish inside of you reduces the chances. Just wait for your next period and take a test. Then decide what step to take next, that is all you can do and worrying isn't going to change that. Keep a straight head and deal with one thing at a time.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Duncan2012)
Do you have access to a doctor/clinic/someone to talk to in whichever country you are in? It sounds like you need to talk to a professional. It's not clear if you've taken the morning after pill at all. Could it be worth coming back early? You need to stop being an idiot and having unprotected sex. A one-off 'mistake' could be understandable, but you've done it twice now. Apart from that it sounds like you have a rational understanding of the situation, and you'll find plenty of support when you ask for it. The worst thing you can do is do nothing. Good luck.

I'm trying to see whats near me but at the moment i'm not having much luck. I have taken the morning after pill after the first time but not the second. Unfortunately the reason I'm out here (and the amount of money it has cost to come out here) makes it impossible to come home any earlier than I am already.

Look, I said I didn't want anyone giving me grief for what i did. It's not something I have done before and it's not something i will do again. I know what i did was stupid and wrong
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Anonymous #2
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U dun goofd
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GeorgeTownsend
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(Original post by georgiaswift)
Just so you guys know, you don't have to finish inside a girl to get her pregnant. The stuff that comes out before is just as effective at doing the job...
I know, that's why I said the fact he didn't finish inside her meant there was a lower probability, not that it was impossible for her to be.
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Anonymοοse
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The morning after pill is effective for at least 72 hours after unprotected sex. It seems you managed to get hold of it fairly quickly (within 24 hours) so there's a very good chance you aren't pregnant. I wouldn't worry too much about your period coming a little early/little late than expected or it being a little heavy/light because the morning after pill does play around with your hormones.

If you're finding your usual hormonal contraception (the pill) unpleasant and it's putting you off taking it, there are many other forms you could try instead such as diaphragms/caps and of course male/female condoms. It may not be as convenient as the pill and it may change the way sex feels but you need to bear in mind that hormonal contraception does not provide protection against STI's. It's always advised you use a barrier method of contraception, such as condoms, if you aren't with a long term partner or somebody you trust and know is disease free.

Finally, don't beat yourself up about it, you made a mistake but you've learnt from it and hopefully will be more careful next time
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cairnsyboyswag
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Buy some condoms.....
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The Good Doctor
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(Original post by georgiaswift)
Just so you guys know, you don't have to finish inside a girl to get her pregnant. The stuff that comes out before is just as effective at doing the job...
It's not. That's the whole point of not finishing inside.

But it's still not a reliable enough method of contraception to do all the time, however the majority of the time it will still work.
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lyrical_lie
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I'm a bit confused. You say you're away from home just now. Are you on holiday surely there is a shop you can go to and buy a pregnancy test. Also you are looking for ways to go into town, can't you just go an meet friends in an area with a boots and buy one. Even small towns have pharmacies. Buy one there? It's much better to go buy one that sit at home worrying. Also look into getting another form of contraception. I have the implant and I think it's fantastic. Definitely speak to your doctor for advice, so you can prevent the worry in future (unless you're like me and paranoid even when using two forms of contraception )
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Schmeckel
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(Original post by Anonymous)
First of all please don't judge me, I know I have been incredibly foolish and ****ed up but I don't need any one else telling me that as I've taken it out on myself enough. I'm just so ashamed and disappointed with myself and don't know what i was thinking.

Last week I met up with a guy for drinks on the monday and things seemed to be going really well. Ended up seeing him every day last week. On wednesday we went out for dinner and I ended up going back to his for a bit. well one thing led to another and we ended up having unprotected sex (he didn't finish inside me as we stopped before that could happen). The next day I woke up ****ting myself so after being on the phone for an hour with my friend crying I booked an emergency appointment at the doctors and got the morning after pill.

I ended up seeing him again later and well the same thing happened again and we ended up having unprotected sex (again he didn't finish inside me as we stopped before it could get to that stage).

I'm honestly so disappointed with myself

I stopped taking the pill (Rivegidon) a couple of months ago as I was a hormonal mess and broke up with my ex at the time so didn't really see the need in finding a new one. When i went to the doctors to get the morning after pill I was given a different pill to cry (cilest). I've read the pamphlet and it says I can take it up to 5 days before the start of my period but tbh I don't know when that will next be as my periods are so irregular and I was told by the doctor that the morning after pill can cause your next period to come early or later than usual. My friend told me to start taking cilest asap after I told her what happened but I haven't because I have no idea when my next period is.

What makes it even harder is that i'm now out of the country until the 16th of April so I can't take a test right now or go to the clinic to be tested for infections. I come home for a day on the 7th so I was planning on using that time to take a test and hopefully go to the clinic as it would have been 2 weeks then. I'm just worried that if I don't have time to do it then is leaving it until i'm back for good on the 16th too late to do anything?!

I'm honestly so scared and ashamed with myself and I haven't really got anyone I can talk too about this. I can't tell my parents (strict Catholics) and I'm not particularly close to them so a conversation like this would be difficult. This isn't the right time in life for me to have a child as much as i love them, I haven't got a well paid job, i go to uni in september and Im not experienced enough with life. I don't know what to say to the guy, he likes me and wants to continue seeing me when i'm home but do i wait and see if my period comes or should I tell him now that i'm worried?

I'm absolutely terrified and really don't know what to do
Well, there are urine tests for this sort of thing---don't need to wait till your period comes. If you do end up with a bun in the oven, the fantastic government of England has a thing called the NHS---free abortions!
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