Family says I'm worthless and stupid because of my degree subject Watch

Anonymous #1
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Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
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shawn_o1
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Cut them off. At least you have a boyfriend so make sure you're ready to buy your own place so that you never have to speak to them ever again
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jambojim97
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How is Economics and Politics 'worthless' when Econ is highly relevant to accountancy? Your family are jerks, and you deserve better.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by jambojim97)
How is Economics and Politics 'worthless' when Econ is highly relevant to accountancy? Your family are jerks, and you deserve better.
I understand It's not engineering but I always thought it was 'respectable' from a decent uni at a decent grade. Plus Econ is relevant to accountancy and that has put me at a significant advantage re my placement year!

I'ts just non-stop though, and it depresses me and makes me feel as if I've achieved nothing.
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NPWorld
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
Are you an Asian by any chance?
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KingStannis
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******s. This STEM **** has to stop.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by NPWorld)
Are you an Asian by any chance?
Nope! White British and female
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by KingStannis)
******s. This STEM **** has to stop.
Plus there is a quite a bit of maths in my degree... :/
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KingStannis
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Plus there is a quite a bit of maths in my degree... :/
You're degree is good; two respected subjects in a good uni. There is simply no case anyone can make against that. You're family probably just feels intimidated because you can offer an intelligent opinion on the news when they probably aren't capable of thinking these things through. I know my Dad hates it when I contradict him.
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Helloworld_95
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Well they're not entirely wrong, quite a few accountancy companies will pay you to train and do a degree, I know KPMG does, and that's the route you're expected to go down. That said your family's being quite harsh.
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NPWorld
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Nope! White British and female
What?!?! I always thought it was just us Asians who are narrow minded. :eek:

I am from an Asian family, and I have heard and seen this all too often. I seriously don't get this view, and personally I have a lot of respect for Economics and the related degrees. Just tell your relatives to wait for a couple of years, and they will see who is earning more and possibly employed. Economists are in high demand, and having a degree in Engineering doesn't exactly guarantee a job.

I am fairly sure that with your degree you will earn much more than your brother. But well done for not listening to their opinions and actually following your dream. I am sure with a persevering, resilient and tolerant attitude you will achieve a lot in life. Good luck with your studies and stop listening to their negativity.
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username360639
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My brother in-law is an Engineer - he's a smartass lol but he can't even do T accounts. If your brother claims to be able to do anything you can do, give him some accounting work provided it "doesn't need a degree". Economics is probably one of the toughest degrees you can do, don't listen to what your family says, they're just jealous of your achievements. You've got your future sorted providing you get the graduate scheme and instead of being civilised people who should be supporting you no matter what, they are just destroying your confidence. I've done an Accounting degree, in the process of doing ACCA and I can tell you this, it is rewarding. Most places ask for a degree in science, or maths related courses to get a look in - 2:1 or 1st mainly so if a degree wasn't necessary why do they state you need these grades to even have a chance.

If it's any consolation, my sister (chartered accountant) earns double what my brother in law does :rolleyes:
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TheWaffle
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
My dad is a financial director who did accountancy qualifications after a humanities degree (languages). He is really glad he didn't just do straight accountancy as he got to study what he loved and he has more skills now from doing his degree so got better jobs. Plus if you do your degree you are not limited if you want to change into a different career.

Your family sound like they treat you horribly. They are wrong to do this. It is a poor reflection on them, not on you. Just keep going with your life and you will prove them all wrong . You should be really proud of yourself- especially having turned your life around after bullying. I've been through it myself so I know how hard it is.
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-sashadasha-
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I agree kinda, not cut them off completely because when you're employed and earning good money, you'll be able to shove it in their face. Just stop going home and when (if) they ask why just say you don't see the point when all you do is get psychologically bullied whenever you come home and you are an adult and don't need to put up with such people. It's your choice in what you want to do and if they don't support that then you shouldn't even listen to their opinions because they don't know what they're talking about. They haven't taken the degree, they don't know how difficult it is and just because your brother is doing something they prefer the look of doesn't mean they're right.


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German123
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
I did not read this whole post but I can relate sort of.


After my GCSE results my dad kept talking about how I should have done better especially in maths.

I try to explain to him but does not want to listen. He also like to compare me with my older sibling.

I try to ignore him so you should try too. I know its hard but it is your life and not theirs.

Do what suits you.

If your parents truly cared they will support you regardless of your career choice.
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neal95
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Wow your family are really confused about this! Your degree is massively respected and now you have a placement you will secure that scheme pr
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neal95
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Provided you have a good attitude and are enthusiastic. Well done to you!
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WillChapman
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I don't understand why your family would treat you like that it sounds terrible At least you have supportive friends and a boyfriend that cares for you, the important thing is to not get discouraged by them and continue doing what makes you happy. Maybe its jealousy? Your brother sounds pathetic and engineering isn't exactly impressive is it? :borat:Your parents should be extremely proud of you especially since you got severely bullied and turned it around to get great grades! Don't take any notice of what they say and remember that you will be laughing in the end
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Anonymous #2
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Haven't read the whole thing, but they sound a bit like my family. They don't approve of the degree I want to take. Think academics is above our station or something. Always hinting about how they wish I would "start contributing" i.e. just work to pay the bills.
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German123
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.

Just read this fully and I would say that you should not give and just get on with life as it is.

I do not think I was academically able until I had the right support so you are not the only person who has felt like that,

Parents tend to compare the achievements of their sons/ daughters to wind them up. For example if one is doing better than the other they would want the less able one to pull his/her sucks up.

You should try and tell your parents and brother how you feel and how they should give you some space because you are a big girl now.


Edit: I hope things work out.
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