Should I buy a house with my boyfriend or wait until I can afford it alone?

So me and my boyfriend of 2 years are sort of at different life stages.....
He is in his first graduate job, on a low salary and isn't managing to save anything due to high commuting costs. We're about to move closer to where he works and he will get a pay rise in September so should start being able to save.

I have been working full time since I graduated 3.5 years ago and have about £32K saved up towards a house deposit. After 8 years of renting, I've had enough of paying other peoples mortgages now and in an ideal world would buy in 6-12 months time.

My difficulty is, my boyfriend won't be able to contribute to a deposit at all, although if I have his salary taken into account when I/we apply for a mortgage then I might be offered a more competitive rate.

I'm also thinking about just waiting another 18-24 months until he has some savings built up and I might be able to achieve a 20% deposit. Renting does at least offer flexibility of moving house which I do appreciate, it wouldn't be the end of the world if I had to wait.

Any advice?

Reply 1

Limpopo

Do you see this as a longer term relationship/marriage etc? Could he support a mortgage application?

If you buy alone will he live with you as a lodger or...err..what?

Reply 2

Smile88egc

Yes his salary could support an application but just no help with the deposit.....

Yeah it's a long term relationship and we will live together whatever happens so I guess yeah if I were to buy alone he would technically be a lodger! I have floated the idea with him and he's not opposed to it as he knows that if it was just him on his own, he wouldn't be in a position to buy for at least 3-5 years.

Reply 3

Pipsico

If you're in a position to buy now, why not just buy it outright, and have your boyfriend pay you rent?

As you said, you don't want to 'throw' money down the drain. And until you're both in a committed relationship and about to marry, then there's no way you should even consider buying a house together.

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Reply 4

Smile88egc

Well with the costs of a mortgage and moving, I'd likely only be able to secure a 10% deposit, meaning I wouldn't be entitled to some of the better mortgage rates.

The main thing that puts me off is just the weirdness of potentially being my boyfriends landlord! It just seems as though this situation isn't that common so I was hoping there would be someone out there in a similar position.

Also on paper my spending habits look a bit haywire so I'd probably have to be a bit sensible for 6 months anyway before anyone would consider lending me a lot of money haha!

Reply 5

claireestelle

You know you can buy it with him but sign a document saying you own slightly more since he can't contribute to the deposit so you could own 60% and he 40% anything happens and the house gets sold and spilt in the way you agreed on paper,something you could consider ?

Reply 6

Pipsico

Original post by Smile88egc

Ok - so if rent is a problem, let's frame it differently. Seeing as you are providing house and home, he could pay the bills/grocery shopping. You take care of the mortgage.

Work out how much you're comfortable with.

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Reply 7

Alfissti

Original post by Smile88egc

Any advice?

Both of you are at somewhat of a different stage of life. Its best to talk to him about the situation and see where he stands on the matter. Also you haven't really been with him for all that long.

Personally I never advise anyone to buy a home together unless you both can contribute equally towards it. Otherwise it will be the source of all kinds of conflicts and arguments.

In terms of how he contributes. If he isn't contributing towards the deposit then you should still charge him some rent to live in the house, bills should be shared equally regardless as should household chores. There really is nothing weird or abnormal about the whole situation, many working adults in similar situation does so. However one thing you should take into account is whether you could still afford the house should there be a situation where he refuses to make any contribution towards the house, say he had a big night out with his mates and drank all his bills money away, owing money to a partner somehow or usually is the case that it isn't deemed to be as much of a debt as one to say a landlord or credit card company.

Personally, the way I'd do it is to go ahead and buy the best you could afford on your own, then rent it out for a few years. In the interim find a place to rent to live with your partner till he is ready to move into his own place. At that time collect a "deposit" for him, use it to renovate the house and also put his name on the title before moving in with him. The other alternative would be to when he is ready then you sell off the house and buy something else together.

Yes, when it comes to this type of issues you simply do need to have an element of tough love.

Reply 8

ebam_uk

I dont know, I think like you say if you can buy something since you know you can buy and rent out. ( ie buy the investment)... rent close to his work.

I stick with the mantra buy the investment ( ie buy to let in upcoming area... milk the rent + equity growth), rent the lifestyle you need... That sounds like the most financially secure then you could even use your investment as a geared leverage to get the lifestyle needed later.

Reply 9

parentlurker

never buy with a boyfriend unless you have separate legal advice. You can own a property in unequal shares but when you buy with anyone you need a clear legal agreement about what happens if you split up.

I'd suggest you rent a bit longer and see how the relationship goes.

Reply 10

Smile88egc

Thanks for all the advice. I'm not keen on buying and immediately renting it out to someone else, I think many mortgage deals don't less you (unless you pay a higher rate), and also I'm a bit to sentimental, if I'm buying a house for the first time, I want to be able to live in it!

I'm hoping with the advent of help to buy isas that my bf will be encouraged to save a little more quickly, I just wish they'd hurry up and introduce them!

Reply 11

ParadoxSocks

Original post by Smile88egc

How soon are you thinking? The buy to rent isas won't work for anyone almost ready to buy. You have to feed it too slowly for it to work out. We've just met with the same disappointment.

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Reply 12

Flather

Why buy houses anyway? **** that **** be mobile and save some money and rent

Reply 13

Smile88egc

Original post by ParadoxSocks

I think realistically for my bf to save enough to contribute for a deposit then we'll be looking at 18-24 months anyway so should be enough to get some benefit from having an ISA each.
I wouldn't want to wait until the end of the ISA period anyway, I think there's a risk that house prices could be affected if all first time buyers want to start using their ISA savings all at once!

Reply 14

Reue

Original post by Smile88egc

Any advice?

Get your conveyancer to put the house equity in un-equal parts. So if you contribute the 10% deposit, you get 55% of the house equity.

You then split all future mortgage payments equally.

It's very common and your conveyancer should be able to do this with ease.

Reply 15

louamie91

I'm in a similar situation myself, but I would be the one that cant afford the mortgage but my boyfriend can as he is looking at selling his first house so we can live in a bigger one, this would also be our first time living together. What did you end up doing? :smile: