Could you please mark my 20 mark essay on poems? GCSE English Literature

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randommariah
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Hey
Im doing Edexcel iGCSE English Literature this year and im wondering if anyone can mark my essay that i did from a past paper. I have provided the website with the mark scheme i just dont really know how to use it.( Edexcel iGCSE English Literature Paper 2 June 2013)
Im doing my English Lit paper in less than 2 weeks and im soooo bad. My targets and A and i just got one of my mocks back saying im a 16/40 D (i think)
I know i repeated a lot of things but i did it under timed conditions and i only attempted the unseen question.
Thanks any help appreciated including criticisms and everything
heres the website with the mark scheme:
http://qualifications.pearson.com/en/support/support-topics/exams/past-papers.html?Qualification-Family=International-GCSE&Qualification-Subject=English%20Literature%20( 2011)&Status=Pearson-UKtatus%2FLive&Specification-Code=Pearson-UKpecification-Code%2Figcse11-eng-lit&Exam-Series=June-2013#step4


Q1. Grace Nichols' poem 'Island Man' is about a man who wishes to escape his current life back to his previous life where he used to live on a tropical island quite different to London where he is now. He wishes to be in the island rather than where he is as it is more appealing to him.
Nichols creates a sense of place, familiarity and belonging in her poem through the use of her descriptive language. We know that the island in the man's dreams/ memories is the place where he belongs because of the line "the steady breaking and wombing". This line suggests that the island man has lived through his dream/memory many times and now knows how the waves will act. The word "steady" suggests to us the readers that the sea was calming and peaceful unlike the hectic London life that he lives through. The word "breaking" may also imply that his dream like state is being broken just as the waves are breaking.


The use of the line "his small emerald island" is significant as it shows how the man is possessive over the island's memory/dream and his will to live there and 'belong' to it. The man thinks the island is precious to him just like an emerald is precious to its owner due to its physical value however the island has a more heartfelt value. The colour of the emerald , vivid green, contrasts to the "dull metallic" London for which the man has no obvious passion unlike his willingness to live on "his island".
Nichols names the road "North Circular" which implies that the road is important as it is named showing that the man also subconsciously acknowledges his belonging to the place of his residence (London).


The capitalisation of the word "Another" emphasizes the word which makes it sound repetitive and relatively uneventful which may be the reason that the island man wants to move, his lack of adventure in London may make him want to move to his island as it seems more tropical, exciting, vivid and colourful the exact opposite of the description of London.
The mood change is at the end of the second stanza when it says "he always come back groggily groggily". The irregular positioning of the word groggily shows that the island man is coming back to reality and yet he is unwilling to do so. The mood change is also when we realise that the island is just a dream or memory from the man. The use of the word "always" in this line plays with our emotions as it makes us have sympathy for the man as he may be homesick and is waking up to the disappointment and dull London day. In the same line the phrase "comes back" suggests that London is always there whether the man likes it or not and so he has to make it part of his sense of belonging in a place.
In all, Nichols uses her poem 'Island Man' to show how the place where you belong may not always be where you expect. It can be where you originate like the island man who belonged with "his island" and where you live although less people acknowledge the second as 'their' place.




I know its a lot but thanks for any help whatsoever
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