Stressed and need advice

Anonymous #1
Report Thread starter 6 years ago
Recently I've been feeling really stressed out and feel like I can't do my A-level exams. Last year I didn't do very well and I'm worried that this is going to happen again which means if I do worse then I will not be able to go to my top choice university. Today I had a bit of a meltdown and just started crying in my lesson in front of my head of sixth form who is my teacher, however I stayed in lesson but I just shut off completely. Once I left to go to my next lesson I saw my friend who knew something was wrong and I just couldn't stop crying. A few of my other teachers saw me and I spoke to one who told me it was perfectly normal to feel like this as it's very stressful for everyone ect. My head of year came in and agreed, and when I told them I kept feeling sick they told me this was normal too.
This afternoon I had a revision class with my head of sixth form and I just kept shutting everything off as I feel like I just don't know anything. He knows this is a problem of mine and despite his and my best efforts I can't seem to get out of this mindset. He then told me he needed to speak to me after and after having another meltdown he basically told me that I need to be more positive and stop closing everything off. I told him that I was worried of a repeat of last year and that I feel so stressed. He said by my behaviour and attitude wasn't normal and I need to speak to my doctor for some temporary help. I'm usually very positive and happy. He asked if my parents knew of the pressure and stress I am feeling and he told me I need to tell them or he was going too. My mum is on holiday and my dad doesn't really understand so I can't talk about it too him. I just really don't know what to do as I don't want to let my parents down by not doing very well and by telling them I don't want them to worry about me. My biggest problem is that I seem like I'm okay when in fact I just want to cry all the time and give up. I know a lot of people feel like this but at the moment I've been feeling really sick and today, twice I've tried to make myself be sick as this is the only way it will stop. I don't want to tell my teachers this as not only do I not think this is serious, I also do not want my parents to find out about this.
I really don't want my friends to know either as at the moment they have some issues with one of their A levels and I don't want them to think I'm just being dramatic.
Badges: 15
Report 6 years ago
Don't force yourself to be sick because that won't actually help at all and will just leave you feeling worse. These feelings are to some extent normal - everyone feels stressed and worried to some degree. Some people experience it extremely badly, others not so bad. You'll be surprised just how common it is, although many out there are good at hiding it.

Now I'm going to be blunt and say you can't completely cure these emotions; but there are many ways to dampen and manage them.

First understand that emotions are just emotions. They aren't a physical thing and you can, at least partially, ignore the emotions by distracting yourself with other work.

Second learn what will make these feelings better or worse.

Reduce stress and worry
Revise plenty, but take regular breaks.
Setup a revision timetable so you can see how much you are doing.
Focus on the here and now, not on your exams.
Remember that there are backup options if things don't go so well.

Increase stress and worry (avoid these!)
Revise constantly with no breaks. AVOID
Don't socialise or relax enough. AVOID. Talk to others and see that they are in the same situation as you.
Procrastinate. AVOID. This may provide short term relief, but in the long run it will worsen things.
Sleep in too much. AVOID. Get plenty of sleep and do lie in for a bit if you want to, but getting started on work early in the day can quell feelings of stress and prevent them from recurring later in the day too.

Third, dream.
Remember why you are doing this and where you want to be in the future. This work will lead you there. Do the work. Get the grades. Everything will be fine
Badges: 11
Report 6 years ago
bro, i remembered when i failed my exams some years back, i was torn apart, i felt like the whole world was crashing down on me, but at a point in time deep inside of me , i knew i dont want to let my parents down. it normal to feel stressed up, but just dont let it eat you up.Take some few minute to relax and search deep inside of you. ask yourself do you want to let your parents down, do you want there hard earn money spent on you to be in vain? Since the answer is NO. Then make up your mind, what ever you do, DONT EVER PUT PRESSURE ON YOURSELF, do it the way that pleases you, always feel relax and always have this big hope that, THIS EXAM WILL BE YOUR LAST A LEVEL.What ever you do, you need to be calm on yourself and dont ever blame yourself for any mistake, instead use that as a step up ladder, put that HARDWORK AND DEDICATION.
Badges: 0
Report 6 years ago
It sounds like things are very very hard for you... I'm amazed by your attitude & determination though... Keep working your butt off and cry your eyes out if you feel like it...

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