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    Hello, everyone. I am new to TSR and wanted to get everyone's opinion on my situation.

    I have known my boyfriend for 6 years. We have been dating for (very soon to be) 3 years; before we dated, we were just good friends. We have been through many milestones, good and bad. I have a steady job, as well as he (also being interviewed for a slightly better job), leaving us financially stable. We have talked openly about our future and what we want from our lives. We have talked about things that would end our relationship (if ever the case; for example, cheating is a big no-no! No cheater gets a second chance). We have talked about our religions and how that would effect our lives in the future. We have been living together for 8 months and have worked through all the little things that bug each other (like him leaving piles of clothes on the floor, whether they were dirty or clean; and me always nagging him about little things). As, I said, we have worked through these things in our time dating and living together. We live in the "attic" of his parents house, and they have expressed more than plenty of times that they are more than happy to have us living there, no matter the circumstances (engaged/married or having children), as long as we continue to help them out (of course!).

    I am in love with him.

    Love is a powerful thing and when you've got it, when you feel it, you'll know it. And I know. He is the absolute best thing that has happened to me, He has motivated me when I have had hardships, and I have given him the pushes he needs to get up and conquer the day with full force. Is it unreasonable that marriage is in my mind? I think about it, and subtly (I think they're subtle, at least) drop hints or bring it up. Is the time we've been together reasonable to feel this way?

    Now, with all that in mind, think about it with this in mind as well. We are both 19 and full time college students as well. In the few, brief moments we have talked about it, I have expressed that I am alright with staying engaged throughout the duration of school and getting married after we both graduate from college. I don't look at marriage as "once you're engaged, you get married" type of occasion. Marriage to me is "taking everyday one step at a time, working out whatever complications that may arise, and living life together, fully and happily". To be frank, I feel that being engaged is more exciting than being married. But that's an entirely different story....

    They say, "'Cause how you get there is the worthier part."

    I would like to know, in your own opinion, what you believe marriage is about and if it is unreasonable for me to want to be engaged.

    Thanks for any and all advice you can give <3 you're a true friend, even though we will, more than likely, never meet.

    P.S. If anyone is looking to be negative, don't bother. I don't take kind to that talk and will surely delete it (if that's a thing on here...maybe block it?).

    You've known him for 6 years and you've been together for 3. You've discussed the future and you both know what you want. I don't think it's unreasonable at all to be thinking about marriage.

    However, marriage also isn't something you just walk into. It's a sacrifice and a sacrament and a bold choice for both you and you're partner. It's a wonderful thing that can be full of Love and passion if you both choose to honour it.

    Obviously you guys are both 19 which may be considered a bit young but you can always have a long engagement. If you're both in Love and know what you want then there should be no rush right?

    Living with parents sounds like a good idea now, but you'll probably want to move out by the time you are getting ready to get married/or have been married for a while. (And that's probably as you will most likely want to and not probably as if I'm giving you advice, lol.

    "The Magic isn't in getting Married, it's in staying Married."

    Hope everything works out.

    - xo
    • #2

    Long engagements are awesome, there is no need to marry now necessarily. Why not wait a little while and save up for the wedding you want, remember the average cost of a wedding is approximately £21,000.
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