What to do if have no friends? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 49 years ago
#1
I have [practically] no friends outside of college, thus I never go out. My parents never seem to go out much so I don't go with them and I have no life. Obvious solution is to ask friends out from college etc but it's more complicated than that on many levels. They don't seem bothered and live a bit away. Summers coming up, college won't be occupying me so what can I do? I'm just some skinny guy so over summer I plan on starting to work out and exercise more, I'll sort my diet out too. I don't really have hobbies outside the house and in a sense socially awkward, I don't know what hobby I could develop or just anything to pass the time. It does seem a bit 'new years resolution which never will happen' but I'm determined to make this summer as good as I can. I'll probably start self-studying my subjects for A2s cos why the hell not and it'll put me ahead. I'm asking this mainly because from experience as I get lonely over the past few summers I just go into a spurt of depression from pure loneliness and I don't want that.Didn't know which subforum this would come under, but I guess it is advice because I want to prevent what will inevitably happen if I take no action. I think the main thing for me is the motivation to leave the house, I think I could force myself to do that but there's just nothing to do it for in my life right now.
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number23
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#2
Report 4 years ago
#2
Focuss on yourself and what makes you happy

Work on your health maybe get in shape a bit, eat better

Get some.hobbies going

Enjoy your own company

then things will fall into place
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Piledriver
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#3
Report 4 years ago
#3
Have you considered getting a job over the summer to keep yourself occupied,or if you've already got one taking on some additional hours? It doesn't have to be anything too major, maybe just a couple days a week. It will keep you occupied, you'll be saving for uni and perhaps even socialise with your colleagues
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ilovereading
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#4
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#4
I totally get you. During last Summer, I spent a lot of time alone and I did spiral in to a depressive state. The internet has helped me loads. Majority of my good/close friends are my "internet" friends who I spend a lot of time with on Skype. It has made me feel less lonely even if I dont go out much. I am even thinking of meeting up with a couple of them. Most of them I found on a site called "tinychat.com" and some I have found on tsr. I'll be your friend if you want - just pm

If this whole internet friend thing sounds sad then ignore me xD but from my experience, its helped :P
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holmes221
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#5
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#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
I have [practically] no friends outside of college, thus I never go out. My parents never seem to go out much so I don't go with them and I have no life. Obvious solution is to ask friends out from college etc but it's more complicated than that on many levels. They don't seem bothered and live a bit away. Summers coming up, college won't be occupying me so what can I do? I'm just some skinny guy so over summer I plan on starting to work out and exercise more, I'll sort my diet out too. I don't really have hobbies outside the house and in a sense socially awkward, I don't know what hobby I could develop or just anything to pass the time. It does seem a bit 'new years resolution which never will happen' but I'm determined to make this summer as good as I can. I'll probably start self-studying my subjects for A2s cos why the hell not and it'll put me ahead. I'm asking this mainly because from experience as I get lonely over the past few summers I just go into a spurt of depression from pure loneliness and I don't want that.Didn't know which subforum this would come under, but I guess it is advice because I want to prevent what will inevitably happen if I take no action. I think the main thing for me is the motivation to leave the house, I think I could force myself to do that but there's just nothing to do it for in my life right now.
I don't know if this helps but as soon as I got myself busy in projects and my hobbies it felt like people I knew wanted to hang out more and for me to do them favours. Sometimes its too much! that I have to refuse as I need more time to myself to do things.

I think a lot of your problems come from boredom more than anything, and your mind turns to depression. If you were busy making something you would be less num.
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Little Popcorns
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#6
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#6
I know where you're coming from summer can be a lonely time. If you want you could try getting a summer job as someone's suggested. Join a sports club or some other type of activity. Plan for the coming year. If you find you're becoming down speak to people online and if things get really bad speak to Samaritans.
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CalebFudgeBrownie
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#7
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Hi there,

I'm sorry you're not feeling all that upbeat at the moment, but hopefully this summer will bring lots of positive experiences your way.

As you've said yourself, it's unfortunate that your college friends live quite far away, but that doesn't mean that you can't enjoy yourself closer to home. Please don't think that your friends aren't bothered about meeting up with you - I'm sure they'd love to, if they didn't live so far away. Okay, so maybe your parents don't go out that much, but just remember that you are your own person - you're not merely an extension of them. You're entitled to go out and do whatever you enjoy and whatever makes you happy, regardless of what they decide for themselves.

I think it's good that you've decided to focus on doing more exercise and improving your diet, as both of these things will be really beneficial for your mental and physical health. Once you begin to notice positive changes in your appearance, this should, hopefully, boost your confidence and self esteem, equipping you a little more to deal with social situations.

I would definitely suggest you make some time to get out there and try something new, as this will help to lessen your social awkwardness. Whether it's trying out a new hobby, joining a club or doing some voluntary work, all these activities are people-oriented, meaning they'll give you the opportunity to meet new people and forge solid friendships over time. Another advantage of doing something of this kind is that it'll keep you occupied and help to pass some time.

Just remember to pace yourself and only do what you feel comfortable doing. If you find that a particular hobby isn't for you, for example, don't worry about giving it up - there are plenty of opportunities out there for you, particularly as you've got so much free time on your hands.

Personally, I think it would be more beneficial to you to focus on rest and relaxation, rather than getting ahead with A2 work. Sure, it won't do any harm to get a feel for what you'll be doing after summer, but I wouldn't make work your sole focus. After all, you've only just finished your AS exams - you deserve to enjoy yourself!

I'm sorry to hear about the depression and feelings of loneliness you've experienced, and I hope things will be different for you this summer. Just try to keep yourself busy doing everyday things, look to your family and friends for love and support (I presume you're able keep in contact with the latter via social media/email) and fill your time with things you enjoy doing, whilst gradually easing yourself into new social situations.

If you feel you need a little reassurance when it comes to trying something new, don't be afraid to tell whoever you feel most comfortable talking to.

Wishing you an enjoyable summer break
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username418231
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#8
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#8
Perhaps get a hobby.
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liaente
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#9
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#9
Lol you don't need friends. What I hear from you sounds excellent! Focus on yourself and improve on yourself. Love yourself because if you can't, who will?
I personally like my own company so you should too! Why would summer be boring w/out friends? I go out in nature because it's FAB.
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